The true history of the world is told in the movies, so obviously what we need is a compilation of movie events to see what was really going on. It’s a work in progress, so there are a few gaps—the period between 1 zillion BC and 65,000,000 BC is a bit sparse on information—but more recent events are better covered. For instance, the year of my birth was quite busy:
1957 New Zealand – Lionel Pritchard and his girlfriend Paquita battle a horde of zombies (Braindead)
Camp Crystal Lake, New Jersey – Jason Voorhees drowns (Friday the 13th)
Michael Myers born (Hallowe’en)
Lana Turner meets Johnny Stompanato (L.A. Confidential, 1997)
The Iron Giant
October Sky
Zombies, supernatural mass murderers, and giant robots…oh, yeah, I remember that. The late 1950s were rife with alien invasions and mutant monsters, too. Lana Turner is a little out of place, until you realize it’s also the year my wife was born.
(via Eclecticism)
“Predators arrive for their feasting ritual on xenomorphs and humans (Alien vs Predator)”
It gets funny when you see this line being repeated every years.
What is so bizzare about that timeline is that they don’t distinguish actual historical events that were simply referred to in a movie versus fictional events.
Jonathan Badger, or that the world keeps ending …
Really, these are the only timelines we need. Since no one bothers to pay attention to real historical events, we might as well learn about zombies and such. Besides, zombies clearly pose a grave threat and if we don’t learn from the past, we’ll never be able to defeat them in the future.
Heh! I was born the day Marty McFly’s parents got together at the school dance. or rather, allowing for the time zones, the day *before*, but the same date.
I seem to recall we had a serious burning van Allen belt problem, too!