The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 32 – Little Loofahs

Three days of devastatingly hot weather were still not enough to dry the oats completely. I threshed two sheaves and got about 500 g out of them. Which is bad; it means I might expect as little as just 3 kg from the whole patch. But I did not thresh the second sheaf completely, because the grains still did not want to separate from the chaff, so I put it aside for now, and I am letting it dry a bit further. The weather forecast so far does not include any major rain; at best, we could get a very light shower.

But there is some progress on the loofah front that I’d like to mention.

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

The loofahs started to drop the female flower buds that were emerging at the stems very early in the season, which was getting me a bit worried that this whole enterprise might be a bust. Which it still might be, but there is hope now. About a week ago, a new flower bud emerged in the tangled mess at the top of the greenhouse, and it matured and flowered very quickly. I was able to pollinate it, and it grows fast – today, it is about 15 cm long and getting bigger every day. I tied it with twine to the greenhouse construction, so if it gets too heavy, it does not rip the vine.

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Today, another one opened, and I did my best to pollinate it again, although there were only two male flowers open at the same time. In the heatwave, the doors to the greenhouse are constantly open, so insects get in there too. I hope they help too.

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

And more female flower buds are hiding in the green tangle. They are not easy to find – I can find one one day and not find it again the next. Luckily, the flowers are bright yellow, so once they open, they are easy to spot.

According to Google, loofah fruit needs about two months to fully mature from pollination. I have weather data for my garden for the last 12 years, and in this time, we never had the first frost before the end of September, and sometimes we even had it as late as the beginning of November. Loofah is sensitive and will probably die before the first frost, but hopefully not before the fruits reach enough maturity to be able to go the rest of the way indoors.

One thing is clear, though – no matter how they taste, growing loofahs for food is not a viable endeavor here, not even in the greenhouse. If I wanted to grow expensive water, cucumbers would be a better option.

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 31 – Absolutely Abysmall and Atrotious Alliums

I tried to grow two varieties of garlic and three varieties of onions in my new raised beds. The raised beds that I did my best to fill with uninfected soil. All crops failed, though for different reasons.

The seed-propagated shallot failed so completely that I do not even have a picture of the failed harvest, because literally zero plants grew to a size worth talking about.

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The other two varieties did fare better in the sense that I did harvest something worth eating, but the bulbs are really small.

The main reasons why the onions failed were two:

  1. The seed snails did not work out very well, as I wrote in the spring when planting them out. The roots attached to the landscaping fabric and when I was planting them out, they got damaged, and the plants had to grow new ones.
  2. The spring was very cold, and the plants did not grow at all for a very long time. I gave some surplus seedlings to my neighbor who planted them in their greenhouse, and she told me they grew OK there. So it seems that to get reliable-ish onions, I will probably need to devise some portable polytunnel shelter for the raised beds.

At least the onions did not get any fungal disease this year, so in that sense, it was a success. I bought permaculture seeds of old variants to try out next year, and if those fail too, I won’t grow onions anymore.

The carrots that shared the same bed with the onions are still growing, but they will not be as good as those I got last year. For reasons unknown to me, the seeds had a difficult time this year taking off, and about one-quarter did not emerge from the ground, despite being pre-germinated just like last year.

And the garlic…

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I have 8 heads of garlic Janko, out of 10 cloves that I saved and planted from last year. And I do not know how many heads of the variety Dukát I got. In the picture it looks like an OK harvest. However…

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Half the plants were infected. I put them in the hottest and sunniest place in the garden to dry out (a gravel path), and I will burn them afterwards. I think it is white rot, Botrytis porri. I will have to try a different fungicide next year, or I will have to forgo garlic completely, since it is evident that this fucking plague is now everywhere in my garden. I will have to look at this issue a bit more thoroughly, because it does not make sense to spend more on fungicides than I would on the garlic itself.

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 30 – Obtaining Oats

Teh whezzer forecast for the next few days is: another heatwave. Thus, I decided to harvest my oats.

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Here is my little field of gold this morning shortly before the harvest. There are still some specks of green in there, but according to what I could find on the internet, this is the stage when naked oats should be harvested. When it is too dry during harvest, it tends to drop the grains on the ground. I have no personal experience with this crop; this is the first year I have tried to grow it, so I hope the information I found is accurate. When extracting the seeds manually from the flowers, they are hard and ripe.

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Oats is not insect-pollinated, but I had an opportunity to spot one of the IMO prettiest butterflies that are to be seen around here. I could not fetch my proper camera for fear of it flittering away, but the tiny beauty was kind enough to let me snap an adequate picture with my phone. I am not a butterfly expert; all I can say with certainty is that it is a member of the family Lycaenidae.

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I thought about how to go about the harvest. I have a scythe, and I do know how to use it, but I was afraid of the aforementioned seed dropping, and I thought that bashing the growth with wide scything sweeps might be detrimental. I considered harvesting it with a sickle, but then I remembered that I have a tiny battery-powered hedge trimmer. That proved to be perfect for the task, and it took me just slightly over half an hour to cut the whole patch.

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I cut it really close to the ground, and if you do not know better, it now looks almost indistinguishable from mown lawn. There are a lot of weeds in there.

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I was far enough with processing the woodpile that one of the old flooring mats on which it was dumped from the truck became available. I laid the oats on it during the harvest just to collect them all in one place.

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And finally, I bound the stalks into sheaves with twine and stood them on the mat. Now I should hopefully get some advantage of the incoming heatwave, and they should dry out nicely. The heatwave should not be long, and it should break with some rain on Friday, so I hope it will completely dry before then so I can thresh it on Thursday afternoon.

As far as that goes, I do not have a process yet. I do not think this is enough for a flail; I will need to devise some small-scale threshing method.

Becoming a President Not Intelligence Proof of Is

I first learned about the very existence of Mango Mussolini when he decided to run for the office of POTUS at the end of Obama’s second term. Until that time, I had no idea who he was or that he existed at all. Although I had read Terry Pratchett’s Going Postal several times at that time. It took a while, but I did eventually realize that Reacher Gilt is his parody, albeit with one difference – Reacher is intelligent and well informed, albeit ruthless and manipulative.

Trump has none of Reacher’s good qualities, only the bad ones.

I listened to some of his speeches at the beginning of his political career, and frankly, I was appalled at their quality, or more precisely, their lack thereof. From the very beginning, he demonstrated profound ignorance about history, current politics, law, economics, and indeed about how the world works in general. I became very quickly convinced that he is an idiot, and the only reason why he is neither in jail nor without a penny to his name is that he was born to riches and that has always shielded him from the most egregious negative consequences of his actions.

But although I was unimpressed with the content of his speeches from the very start, he was at least speaking coherently and staying on topic back then. It went downhill from that time on; his speeches deteriorated both in quality with regard to content, as well as regarding the execution. Nowadays, he trips over words, is unable to follow a coherent thought to the end, and rehashes old grievances all the time, all signs of dementia.

So IMO, he was always a fool, and now he is a demented fool. Yet he won the presidency twice, and just barely lost once. And to this day, many people keep saying that this is proof that he is neither demented nor a fool, but actually intelligent and a masterful manipulator. I disagree for several reasons.

Mainly, he did not actually have to manipulate the American public to vote for him. A sizable portion of said public was always racist, bigoted, ignorant, and resentful, and these “qualities” were nurtured and elevated as virtues by the USA right-wing pseudonews apparatus for decades prior to his entering the political arena. A self-feeding loop was thus created just prior to 9/11, and it has fed on itself ever since, culminating in the rise of the Tangerine Tyrant. He was at the exact cross of a crass, boorish, racist, ignorant, and resentful asshole and a dude whose riches served as an easy-to-understand shorthand for competence for the voter base to look up to. Because actual competence requires effort to recognize.

He was just lucky to be the exact guy that the already pre-manipulated masses of hateful peabrained bigots wanted. He did not win their vote because he was intelligent; he won it because he fit the mold of hate that was formed in their minds through decades of propaganda.

That he became president is not proof of his intelligence, knowledge, or competence. It is proof of a profound lack of all those qualities in the American public.

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 29 – Pretty Polinators

I realized that I have a pretty expensive camera, but I haven’t been using it for a long time except for photographing my mother’s gingerbread creations. So this morning I took a break from heavy lifting, and I took the camera to take some pretty-ish pictures of the pollinators that like to visit my oregano patch. I did not manage to make very many because I did not have the battery fully charged prior to this spur-of-the-moment action, but I did get some. And I did not bother with the macro lens.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

Butterflies do not have a long life, but some manage to have it pretty rough and survive even so, as this specimen proves. Faded colors, chewed-up wing edges, yet still it flies.

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

Peacock butterflies are probably the prettiest butterflies that live around here. They look drab, almost coal-black with their wings folded, but stunningly beautiful when they flash their eyes from time to time to scare off or confuse predators.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

There were multiple bee species present, but they were turning their hairy butts towards me and generally being uncooperative and blurry.

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

And of course several bee-mimicking hoverfly species were also present, being just as uncooperative as bees.

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Bees and butterflies get all the press when it comes to pollination, but some beetle species are important in this regard too. And they are often very tiny.

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

There were also smaller butterfly species there, and I did not manage to capture all those present by far.

 

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 28 – Bee Busy

All the assorted pumpkins are growing and flowering, but only the butternut and partypants look promising.

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I have five butternuts that are now about 1 kg and still growing.

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Almost daily, I get new butternut flowers, and I do my best to pollinate them manually. In two cases, those attempts failed already, because there were no really fresh male flowers open at the same time. But mostly, the plants still progress, and the number of fruits should still go up for at least a few weeks.

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Real bees do like the flowers too, as does an assortment of beetles. And occasionally slugs. Luckily, the slugs prefer wilted flowers over fresh ones, so once old flowers start to drop off, the slugs leave the freshly open ones alone.

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I mostly do not bother manually pollinating the other pumpkins, because I do not have very many healthy flowers for it to be worth the bother. Luckily, insects bother even so, so I should get at least my work’s and the seed packet’s worth out of most of them. Although the bulk of the assorted failures will be compensated by the butternut plants.

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The loofahs are flowering, but still only male flowers. Several of the female flower buds stopped developing and eventually wilted away. I have no clue what the cause of this is. Maybe the weather is too cold – after the heatwave that started the summer, we have now had several weeks of the same weather that we had at the end of May. Nighttime outdoor temps have even dropped below 10°C for three days in a row now. This also means that outdoor tomatoes are not doing particularly swell.

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The bell peppers are really puny so far, and the plants grow at a snail’s pace. I probably won’t bother overwintering these the next winter, and I will try to grow new pepper plants of a different variety. I also won’t grow them directly in the soil in the greenhouse the next year, but in large containers. That way, I can move them to a sunnier place when the weather is really warm – my greenhouse is in partial shade. Tomatoes do not mind, but peppers apparently do.

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The potatoes Agrie are indeed an indeterminate variety, since they keep flowering even on plants that already did so. In the meantime, the Bellarosa variety began to wilt (as it should), and it might be ready for harvest sometime next week or so.

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I harvested more oregano than I can use in a year, so I left the rest of the plants to flower as much as they want. They attract a lot of pollinators – bees, bumblebees, and butterflies. None of which I managed to take a picture of.

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Pollinating a few pumpkin flowers every day is not much work, but I have been extremely busy even so – I have ordered circa 7 metric tonnes of wood scraps for winter fuel, and I need to bag, weigh, and store it all for winter. That is a lot of work, and I have to insert rest days into it every few days; otherwise my hands would probably fall off at the shoulders. Each of these bags weighs 20 kg. I would prefer smaller, 10 kg bags. They are much easier to handle, but they are not sold in a UV-hardened variant, so I am stuck with these behemoths. And filling these only 50% is not a financially wise option, since they are quite expensive. The smaller bags are cheaper, but since they are not hardened, they tend to disintegrate after a year or two. And it is not fun when a bag decides to fall apart at the exact moment one carries it down wet stairs in freezing winter.

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And lastly, there will be a series of knife-related posts again on my knife blogge. I got a small commission for a santoku akin to the one with an olive wood handle that I made a few years ago. And there will also be a series of knife-related posts on Affinity, because I will recycle the blade in the picture above. I found it in the pile of wood scraps. It was probably used by the sawmill workers to cut packing straps and other heavy-duty work. It was badly mishandled (evidently) and really badly sharpened. It was also a bad design even when it was brand new – this type of integrated bolster not only adds a lot of completely unnecessary weight to the blade (which might be considered just an opinion), but it also objectively makes it more difficult to maintain a sharp edge and to sharpen it properly when blunted. I will write a bit more about that knife-design trivia too.

Once repurposed, I will decide what to do with the blade. I will probably just give it away to someone.

 

 

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 27 – Squashes Start

Hokkaido, zucchini, marrow, and pattypans do not look promising, although I should get some, at least of the last sort. The butternut squashes, on the other hand, have grown like mad, and they were completely unaffected by the slugs. And today…

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© Charly, all rights reserved. Click for full size.

… I got the first three female flowers. I hope my attempts at manual pollination worked, because unfortunately, there weren’t very many male flowers open at the same time, and some were already closing.

However, this is really promising. I got the first female flower full seven weeks earlier than last year, so even if we get the first frost at the average time (end of September), I could look at a substantial amount of fully ripe fruit. I do not want to get my hopes up; that’s usually a surefire recipe for disappointment, but there are plenty more buds in the making and the vines are still growing in length by about 5-10 cm a day, with some reaching the very top of the trellises already.

I only wish the loofahs were flowering too. They are not; the vines still only grow in length, even though they have reached the roof of the greenhouse already.

The Greater Gardening of 2026 – Part 26 – Lots of Legumes

Let’s talk legumes, baby!

Well, maybe I got my wires crossed a bit there, but legumes are important in the garden, and I have a lot of them around, so I think they do deserve some attention.

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Nothing to see here, because this is a freshly tilled patch where green peas were. I harvested about 2 kg of peas from 250 g of seed, which is not very impressive tbh. If I were growing peas to save money, it would not be very efficient. But I am mostly growing peas to improve the soil, which is why I immediately sowed this patch with peas again, this time with yellow peas. Those won’t be harvested at all; they will be tilled in green as a fertilizer sometime in August/September, after which this patch will be sown with durum wheat to test if I can grow it here.

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Yellow peas started to swell up, so I do hope to get my own seed for the future to compensate for the very disappointing germination rate of bought seed. However, this probably won’t be impressive either, because many pods are attacked by pea weevil Bruchus pisorum. This pest is a problem in my garden, and there is not really a good solution.

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Leftover green pea seeds from last year had a nearly 100% germination rate, and it looks like I might get a 1000% dividend. I am letting the whole patch fully ripen to get my own seeds. This variety grows extremely fast, so it is eminently suitable as a green fertilizer both in the spring before other crops, as well as in the fall after the main season. And the green peas are very tasty too. But the seeds are fairly expensive, thus the effort to grow my own.

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White runner beans are starting to bloom. But surprisingly, some plants have red blossoms, so there was some cross-pollination with the red runner beans. Which is annoying; I wanted to get a pure white strain, and I am getting red blossoms from white beans. The hybrids will be perfectly edible, but…

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Various bush beans are starting to look less pathetic, and first flower buds are showing up too. I do hope to get my own seeds for the next season; buying bean seeds over the last few years has been very frustrating and disappointing.

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Alfalfa is now knee-high and flowering. I won’t mow it; I will let it grow until the end of August, then I will mow it and till it in. A lot of weeds sprouted in the alfalfa patch, whose seeds were suppressed in the lawn. That will be a bit of a problem the next year, when I want to grow spelt here.

And now let’s switch to native legumes that are important in my garden.

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I did mention already that I wish to gather seeds of the bush vetch Vicia sepum to propagate it more around my garden for the future. But that is not the only native legume for which I have plans.

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White clover Trifolium repens grows anywhere on the walk paths, and I intend to encourage it to do so by not mowing it too short. It is a pesky weed in a vegetable patch, but a valuable asset elsewhere due to its ability to resist being trodden on and to alleviate soil compaction.

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Bird vetch Vicia cracca grows in the meadows outside my garden, and I found a plant in an area where it was not mown when making hay. I will harvest its seeds, and I hope to propagate it in my garden too. Fast-growing, local nitrogen fixer, excellent for composting. And when it sprouts as a weed in a vegetable patch, it does not compete much with anything and is easy to manage, remove, or simply leave to be.

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Several patches of red clover Trifolium pratense appeared in my front yard. I have mown the lawn around them so the heads ripen. I want to harvest the seeds too. It is an excellent nitrogen fixer; in my area it grows better than alfalfa, and bumblebees love it.

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And the last legume whose seeds I wish to propagate around my garden is bird’s foot trefoil, Lotus corniculatus. It is not as fast-growing and big as others, but it is pretty, pollinators of all kinds love it, and it is reasonably drought-resistant. Thus, another good local alternative to alfalfa.

The main downside to all these native plants is the same one that alfalfa has – the seeds are teeny tiny and fairly difficult to harvest. We shall see whether I succeed or not.

For many of these, to my surprise, it is also possible to buy seeds – they are sold by a shop selling beekeepers’ equipment and accessories. Although I would prefer to get seeds from local plants. These are uncultivated wildflowers, and thus they should be pretty genetically diverse across CZ, and indeed the whole of Europe. With seeds from local plants, I have a guarantee that they are genetically adapted to the local environment. Seeds from plants that were, most probably, grown in a warmer climate and better soil at lower elevations might not do as well here.

I am still really seriously considering buying a packet of seeds of each in the spring, mix them up, till the poorest soil in my garden (my front yard), and sow the mix there to see if something comes of it. The seeds are not that expensive, and it might be worth it even if they have a poor germination rate.