The GREATEST, HOTTEST, and MOST SPECTACULAR ego ever

I’m sure it’s just a routine formality that the White House Correspondents Association invites every president, every year to attend their annual dinner, only this year the corpulent orange pedophile has accepted the invitation, and has of course turned it into a notable accomplishment. It’s not. But still…this man suffers from a tragic metastatic cancer of the narcissism gland.

The White House Correspondents Association has asked me, very nicely, to be the Honoree at this year’s Dinner, a long and storied tradition since it began in 1924, under then President Calvin Coolidge. In honor of our Nation’s 250th Birthday, and the fact that these “Correspondents” now admit that | am truly one of the Greatest Presidents in the History of our Country, the G.O.A.T., according to many, it will be my Honor to accept their invitation, and work to make it the GREATEST, HOTTEST, and MOST SPECTACULAR DINNER, OF ANY KIND, EVER! Because the Press was extraordinarily bad to me, FAKE NEWS ALL, right from the beginning of my First Term, | boycotted the event, and never went as Honoree. However, | look forward to being with everyone this year.

I have doubts that many of these “Correspondents” now admit that | am truly one of the Greatest Presidents in the History of our Country, the G.O.A.T., according to many, but now that he has packed the White House press room with toadies from the fringes of “journalism”, he might just have a few more supporters in attendance. I will be disappointed if the real journalists in the room don’t turn it into a roast. Ah, screw it, I expect to be disappointed and for this to be nothing but an exercise in applied sycophancy. The media sucks.

He even expects the food to be the GREATEST, HOTTEST, and MOST SPECTACULAR? Serve him cold, bland porridge, and dump it in his lap.

I can’t compete with that!

Ken Ham is going to be at a benefit dinner. If you want to join him, you’ll have to pay.

$30,000 to sit at a trough with that pig-ignorant liar and fraud Ken Ham? To benefit a ghastly Christian school that promotes ignorance to the children of rich dopes? Jesus, I’m in the wrong business.

I have a counter-offer. Come to Morris, Minnesota and we can have a hearty Midwestern breakfast at Don’s Cafe. I’ll pay since you have to go to all the trouble of getting here. We’ll have a pleasant and interesting conversation, and maybe afterwards I can take you on a tour of a real college, the University of Minnesota Morris.

That’s the best deal I’ve got. I’ll also apologize for the fact that the USA has become the Upside-Down.

Drop me an email and let me know when you’re coming down.

This summer will be no fun

I am committed to retiring as of May 2027. I’ve yet to talk to any administrators about it, but this has been such a terrible year — knees going kerblooiee over the summer, a bad fall last month — that I don’t think my body can keep up with all the pressure. I can make it one more year, I’m pretty sure, and then I get to live a worry-free life, lounging about the pool, sipping pina coladas, etc., that’s how it works, right?

But then I looked around my office…I have over 26 years of accumulated books, just books.

That’s less than half — there’s another set of shelves on the other side of the room. I’ve been shedding a few, mainly giving them out to students, but now they all have to go. I think this is the summer I have to clear everything out somehow. I’ll sell some, give away some, some are going to a landfill (I’ve got toxic creationist books that it would be irresponsible to release into the wild.) A while back, I gave away a lot of old textbooks to a charity that would ship them off to African schools, maybe I can look them up and give them a good home.

Then there’s the lab. I hope Mary doesn’t mind housing a lot of spiders.

Anyway, I think shutting down and cleaning up will be my major summertime project. That, and occasionally skipping off to observe more spiders.

They’re all cowards

Maybe one of the statues looks like this?

You don’t support ICE or join the Republican party unless you’re afraid. Enjoy this collection of stories of chickenshit conservatives.

In the latest installment of “Immigration and Customs Enforcement thugs are big babies,” Oregon Public Radio obtained some incredibly distressing audio of an armed ICE agent—safely ensconced in an unmarked vehicle—who called 911 in October 2025 because he was being followed by a kid on an e-bike.

Yes, really.

But the problem here isn’t just that ICE agent Israel D. Hernandez was apparently so freaked out by a child biking near his car that he felt it warranted an emergency police response.

The real problem is that Hernandez told the 911 operator, “I need someone here now, or else I’m going to have to shoot this kid.”

Hernandez even pulled his service weapon out of the central console so he could be locked and loaded to protect himself from the child.

Dude, you know you could have just, like, sped up, right? You’re in a car, the kid is on a bike.

But according to Hernandez, the kid came up to his window and perhaps even broke one of the vehicle’s mirrors, so he told the dispatcher, “I’m going to have to act on this kid right now.”

I think it would be neat to have an e-bike, except that they’re only useable for about 6 months out of the year here, unless you like freezing your face off. The weather does not discourage Minnesotans in other ways, though.

In December, they begged Minneapolis police and the Hennepin County Sheriff’s Office to help them, claiming that “we only have a few officers but we have 60 to 70 agitators fighting them.”

Sounds serious!

Except what really happened was that people stood around yelling at ICE and throwing some snowballs while the agents violently detained a woman, dragging her on the icy ground on her stomach. Local law enforcement dutifully arrived, only to say that there were no “life-safety conditions” requiring a response and took off after 10 minutes.

None of this is surprising, since they’re led by a demented coward, a guy who never served and doesn’t respect the military, but was willing to send bombs and missiles against Iranian targets. And then wouldn’t even answer questions about his responsibilities!

President Trump did not answer shouted questions on Iran when he returned to Washington tonight. He did comment on new statues that have been installed in the Rose Garden, telling reporters, “Unbelievable statues.”

He’s always on the lookout for distractions from the hard questions.

I don’t care about his statues. I hope they’re knocked down and hauled to a garbage dump the instant he’s out of office, may that day arrive soon.

I could have told them that

Conservative media likes to play up their persecution complex — and colleges are a common target. We’re too liberal, they say, we try to silence conservative students. None of that is true, as a recent poll shows.

According to a report that Gallup and the Lumina Foundation published today, just 2 percent of all college students—including 3 percent of Republicans—say they feel they don’t belong on campus due to their political views. That’s one of the many disconnects between public perceptions about higher education’s climate and value and what students say is actually happening on campus, according to the report, “The College Reality Check: What Students Experience vs. What America Believes.”

Two to three percent sounds about right, and probably represents the fraction of faculty who are outright assholes (we’ve always got a few of them, any slice of humanity you can choose will have a few bad apples rattling around.) Almost all students are welcome, we like to discuss controversial issues and present dissenting views, and we actually have expectations for passing a class that do not ever include holding a particular political affiliation, or what kind of haircut you have, or who you voted for in recent elections.

However, I was disappointed by one result from the poll.

The results showed that two-thirds of college students said most of their professors encourage them to share their views, including those that make others uncomfortable. At the same time, 71 percent said their professors create a classroom environment that supports both students who express unpopular opinions and those who may be upset by such views.

Only 71%? I don’t believe it. One of our most common challenges is getting students to speak up — I want students to raise their hand or just shout at questions in the middle of a lecture…please please please interrupt me and tell me what you are thinking. I think that’s true of every faculty member, getting students to think and express themselves is our job. Too many students want to just get through the class and get out of there, and getting a conversation going is harder than just taking notes and listening quietly.

I have never objected to conservative students taking my classes. If anything, it goes the other way–I’ve had students put me on lists at FIRE and TPUSA, they’ve reported me to the campus police (that never goes anywhere), they know me at local churches that I do not attend. A few years ago, we had a TPUSA chapter that constantly posted posters with their stupid slogans on them — I’ve seen a few with Sharpie ‘enhancements’, but that’s about the limit of their oppression. One of their representatives did go on to win notoriety by graduating, joining Project Veritas, and getting arrested for breaking into a Louisiana politician’s office. Note that he did graduate.

Come to think of it, I just checked our list of student organizations, and TPUSA isn’t on it! We must have hounded them out of existence. Or, more likely, the former members were so aggressively antagonistic and unpleasantly ineffectual that they tainted the reputation of their organization for years to come, and no one wanted to join. I didn’t kick them out, despite their feeble efforts to kick me out.

My secrets exposed!

Several people have been asking how they can support the site, given our recent breakdown. I just want to say…don’t worry about it. It’s relatively inexpensive so far, and I have this patreon account that covers it 100% plus a bit more I can salt away for future emergencies. So sure, you can join that if you want to chip in a bit: it will be appreciated, and you get my videos commercial free and if ever my spiders start laying again, you’ll get cute and adorable spiderling photos.

However, I have also learned some surprising facts about myself from one of those cheesy AI-driven sites that claims to have inside information on ‘celebrities’ (they’re scraping the bottom of the celebrity barrel if they’re speculating about me.) But look at this!

PZ Myers is one of the richest Biologist from United States. According to our analysis, Wikipedia, Forbes & Business Insider, PZ Myers ‘s net worth $5 Million. (Last Update: December 11, 2023)

If I’m one of the richest biologists in the country, I pity the rest of you. And sorry, my net worth is nowhere near even a million. My main asset is my house, which is paid off, but is still only worth about $150K. I live in an area with low housing costs.

However, that isn’t the biggest surprise.

According to our records, PZ Myers is possibily single & has not been previously engaged. As of December 1, 2023, PZ Myers’s is not dating anyone.

Relationships Record : We have no records of past relationships for PZ Myers. You may help us to build the dating records for PZ Myers!

Form a line, ladies. One of the wealthiest biologists in the country is available!

You will have to fight your way past Mary, though.

We live, under the dead hand of Ed Brayton

Freethoughtblogs was first born out of conversations between myself and Ed Brayton in 2010-2011, when we were maximally disgusted with the direction the atheist movement was taking. So we set up our own little domain and tried to recruit fellow humanist/secular writers to fill up our pages. That was mostly successful, with a few setbacks now and then.

Then in 2020, Ed, who was suffering with a chronic illness, checked himself into a hospice and died, peacefully. He passed along all the logistical info for the website to me, we thought, so I had the account and password for our domain host, Bluehost. We kept cruising along.

Then Bluehost made a security enhancement: when I logged in, they would send a verification code to Ed, to make sure nothing underhanded was going on. Ed did not reply, for obvious reasons. So we can’t actually change anything about the domain, which again, was OK. We didn’t need to.

But then, Bluehost needed us to pay for their services. They sent notifications and bills to poor dear Ed, who didn’t care, and didn’t contact me in my dreams or anything, so those bills were unpaid. Ooops. Two weeks ago, they pulled the plug on freethoughtblogs.com. And no doubt sent an informative announcement to Ed, who didn’t notice.

So for the last two weeks, I’ve been shouting down phone lines and internet cables with the simple information that “ED IS DEAD, PLEASE UPDATE THE CONTACT INFORMATION AND FIX THE SITE”, and they would send me all these long legal forms that I would fill out with all the information that I had and send it back to them, and they would ignore me, and the next day I’d get into a conversation with a chatbot who would obliviously send me the same requests all over again.

Then this morning, a breakthrough. I didn’t try to update the information at all. I didn’t explain that Ed was dead. I just said, “I understand our bill is past due, here is my credit card number, can I please pay everything off?” and they said “Yes, we would be delighted to take your money” and they did, and they pushed a button, and our service is restored.

The only drawback is that freethoughtblogs is a company that is still officially owned by a ghost. No one cares as long as we the living pay the bills.

I paid up for five years in advance, so remind me in 2031 that I, or someone, needs to generously cough up a few bucks in Ed’s name.

For now, we can resume slapping words on a wall.

No ghosts in the brain

The Washington Post ran an article with the provocative title, “These Patients Saw What Comes After Death. Should We Believe Them? Researchers have developed a model to explain the science of near-death experiences. Others have challenged it.” It’s obviously empty fluff, garbage of the kind that gets pumped out all the time to appeal to the gullible yokels in their readership. I’m not one of them. I also refuse to read the WaPo anymore (rot in hell, Jeff Bezos), but then, fortunately or unfortunately, the same article has appeared on Beliefnet, sans paywall. Now everyone can see how insipid the ‘evidence’ for life after death is. This article should present some evidence. It doesn’t. It’s the usual anecdotal silliness.

Here’s their big example.

After she dropped to her knees outside her home in Midlothian, Virginia, suffocating, after she was lifted into the ambulance and told herself, “I can’t die this way,” and after emergency workers at the hospital cut the clothes off her to assess her breathing, Miasha Gilliam-El, a 37-year-old nurse and mother of six, blacked out.

What happened next has happened to thousands who’ve returned from the precipice of death with stories of strange visions and journeys that challenge what we know of science. Last year, a team of researchers from Belgium, the United States and Denmark launched an ambitious effort to explain these experiences on a neurobiological level — work that is now being contested by a pair of researchers in Virginia.

At stake are questions almost as old as humanity, concerning the possibility of an afterlife and the nature of scientific evidence — questions likely to take center stage at a conference of brain experts in Porto, Portugal, in April.

“The next thing I knew, I was out of my body, above myself, looking at them work on me, doing chest compressions,” Gilliam-El said, recalling Feb. 27, 2012, the day she suffered a rare condition called peripartum cardiomyopathy. For reasons that aren’t fully understood, between the last month of pregnancy and five months after childbirth, a woman’s cardiac muscle weakens and enlarges, creating a risk of heart failure.

Gilliam-El, who had given birth just three days earlier, recalled watching a doctor try to snake a tube down her throat to open an airway. She remembered staring at the machine showing the electrical activity in her heart and seeing herself flatline. Her breathing stopped.

“And then it was kind of like I was transitioned to another place. I was kind of sucked back into a tunnel,” she said. “It is so peaceful in this tunnel. And I’m just walking and I’m holding someone’s hand. And all I’m hearing is the scripture, ‘Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death …’”

Please, please learn about the concept of confabulation. If you black out, when you resume consciousness, your brain quickly invents stories to fill the gap. They aren’t necessarily accurate. A trained nurse is going to be familiar with happens to patients who lose consciousness, and could overlay that on the period when she was actually non-functional. She’s also pre-loaded with religious mythology, and that gets stuffed into the constructed memory. It’s not evidence of anything.

I have a recent personal experience that applies. I too blacked out after a fall; I remember the pain of bouncing my skull off the sidewalk, and then the next thing was becoming aware that I was sitting in my office at work. I remember nothing of what happened between those moments.

But I quickly made assumptions. I must have (scenario A) got up, dusted myself off, and walked to work by force of habit. Or (scenario B) a pedestrian must have helped me up and sent me on my way, or (scenario C) a passing motorist pulled over and gave me a lift to the building, or (scenario D) an angel swooped down, clutched me to her soft downy bosom, and transported me to my office chair before giving me a revitalizing swig from the cask of whisky she carried in a cask on her collar. Do I have any evidence for A) my indomitable will, B) a pedestrian, C) a motorist, or D) an angel? No I do not. Some might be more likely than others, but I can’t claim I have any verifiable evidence for any of them.

Likewise, Gilliam-El knows she passed out in an ambulance — and we can find evidence for that — and that she regained consciousness in a hospital some time later — also based on evidence. But all the stuff about entering a tunnel and holding hands and hearing scripture, is an unverifiable invention of her brain.

That’s all these articles ever provide, a collection of stories people provide after periods of unconsciousness to rationalize their experience, and then calling them “evidence for life after death”. They’re not.

It’s always annoying that these ideas get “experts” who are unable to distinguish fantasy from evidence to support a popular myth.