Your puny space shuttles are as toys to our powerful invertebrate overlords.

Put a couple of illustrators together to draw superheroes, each one able to defeat the previous one, and what do you get? Weirdness. Especially when one of the superheroes is…The Creationist.

The ability to make evidence disappear sounds powerful, until you realize that all it really is is the ability to close his eyes very tightly.

Here’s a useful formula devised by Jessa to evaluate creationist hate mail, called the Creationist Rant Absurdity Phenomenon Index:

CRAP Index = M + 10(µ + Ω + I) + 10^{(F + σ + ρ)} + (H)(1.0 x 10⁶)

Where:
M = number of words in all capitals
µ = number of misspelled words
Ω = number of superfluous quotes around words or phrases
I = number of exclamation points
F = number of factually incorrect statements
σ = number of times the words “Darwinist,” “evolutionist,” etc. are used (double points for “evilutionist”)
ρ = number of insults
H = number of statements that the recipient is going to/will burn in/will rot in Hell

Somebody needs to code up a mail plug-in that will automatically score incoming mail for me…although I fear that F, σ, and ρ are probably difficult for software to recognize at this point. I also think there ought to be extra points for sequential exclamation points. Maybe we need a simplified index that is machine-calcuable.

Here are a few ideas. Myself, I don’t have a “Mohammed”, but I have decided to call any trip to the bathroom a Hajj.

Those cats are just everywhere — now lolcats can has science. Even worse, it’s dominated by geology LOLcats. Geologists are too abrasive and intrusive to have a sense of humor, and it takes ages for them to tell a joke.

I do have something to say to physics cat, though.

Here, kitty kitty. I have a box, a geiger counter, and some cyanide for you.