I’m adding Infested to my must-see list of spider movies


On the recommendation of catherwood on Discord, I had to watch this movie last night, Infested.

Eight tarsal claws up! Unless you’re arachnophobic, in which case you don’t want to get anywhere near this.

It’s pretty much the same plot as Arachnophobia: venomous spider is brought back to a city (Paris, in this case), it escapes, breeds, area is overrun with swarms of deadly spiders that require extreme measures to eradicate. The difference is that Infested has a much larger horror-fantasy element: the spiders spawn impossibly rapidly — like, catch one, next moment it erupts into a horde of tiny spiders — and the spiders grow at an impossible rate to an impossible size, so that within a day you’ve got millions of spiders, some the size of large dogs. I’ve measure spider growth rates, and generally we’re talking a few tenths of a millimeter per week, so my rational brain rejected much of the premise, but my irrational brain that tuned in to a horror movie about monster spiders was saying, “YES! Eat all the people!”

It also has a sympathetic protagonist who loves small invertebrates while hustling to keep his friends and family out of poverty, and huge host of victims living in a Parisian apartment building. There had to be a lot of them to fuel the explosion of arachnid biomass!

Sadly, it looks like the only place to catch it right now is on Shudder, but it’s worth it for the entertainment value.

Now, though, no more entertainment. I have to go sequester myself to work through a mountain of end-of-semester papers. If only I could solve that problem with a lot of precisely placed explosives…

Comments

  1. says

    Nah, not by an AI. It’s more like they smashed two good movies together, Arachnophobia and Attack the Block, and this what came out.

  2. drken says

    It’s tough to tell how good a movie is from the trailer, but it looks like fun to me. It’s no Kingdom of the Spiders, but what is?

  3. lakitha tolbert says

    P z #5: Did you get a chance to watch Sting? And did you like it?
    Although, I don’t think the creature in that movie was an arachnid, but an an arachnid look-a-like of some kind.

  4. birgerjohansson says

    What PZ needs is a spider Kaiju film.
    Meanwhile, I am hoping the guy behind the Lord Of The Rings films goes back to his origin (Black Sheep, Bad Taste) and makes a big-budget giant spider splatter film. Alien organism mates with local arthropods, bring popcorn.

  5. Rob Grigjanis says

    birgerjohansson @9: Jackson had nothing to do with Black Sheep. I could tell, because I enjoyed it.

  6. macallan says

    @9

    Meanwhile, I am hoping the guy behind the Lord Of The Rings films goes back to his origin (Black Sheep, Bad Taste) and makes a big-budget giant spider splatter film. Alien organism mates with local arthropods, bring popcorn.

    Eight-legged Freaks meets Braindead? New that would be fun.

  7. lakitha tolbert says

    Well, I did go on search for giant spider movies and watched one called Big A** Spider, about. spider that grows big enough to take out a city, and then I watched a couple of Asian versions called Giant Spider, with people transforming into giant spiders , and Sector 7 where a giant aquatic spider chases a group of people around an oil rig.
    I would describe every one of these films as silly and goopy!

  8. Walter Solomon says

    Denis Villenueve’s Enemy has to have the title for the film with the largest spider ever. The damn thing towers over skyscrapers.

    Alas it was only in one short scene since the film is a psychological thriller that uses spiders as motif rather than a horror or action film with spiders as the antagonists.

  9. birgerjohansson says

    As long as it is not steam-powered pseudospiders like in that disappointing film.

    A psychological thriller -The Babadook with eight legs?

  10. birgerjohansson says

    Suggested film: The Ungoliant vs. the Alien? (For Dog’s sake, don’t bring the crew that made Predator vs Alien).

    Mars Needs Spider Women?
    Plan Eight-Legs From Outer Space?

  11. birgerjohansson says

    I stand corrected. Unlike Trump I do not claim to have an excellent memory based on a test with five words.

  12. birgerjohansson says

    The spiders in the plot act like the parasites that followed the big kaiju from space that landed at New York in the Wossname film.

    Anyway this proves once again Dick Cheney was wrong when he argued for a tiny ultra-tech military instead of “boots on the ground”. You need Ripley times one million to flamethrow creepy-crawlies.

  13. Akira MacKenzie says

    Actually went to see Spy x Family: Code White last week. Call me an anime weirdo (I think the term “Weeaboo” is what the whippershappers use), but I love that that shows blend of Sean-Connery-Bond -style spy thriller and wholesome family comedy. It’s True Lies but you can bring the kiddos.

  14. birgerjohansson says

    Akira MacKenzie @ 21
    Anime: I have heard a lot of positive things about Frieren: After Journeys’ End .

    Technically a slice-of-life anime but with plenty of fighting. The core of the anime is “carpe diem” . When you are an elven mage that lives for millennia it is easy to overlook the brief things and relations that give life a greater meaning.
    Suggested as a palate cleanser for those disappointed by the Lord if the Rings TV series. In Frieren every character has depth.

  15. Rich Woods says

    I have seen Infested. Some of the sillier moments didn’t impress me, but I think they made a very good job of creating their core cast of characters and letting the actors bring them fully to life.

  16. WhiteHatLurker says

    I saw Infested at the local horror film festival. It was a fun watch, but I’m not sure about the 8 limbs up. (I actually like “Kingdom of the Spiders” more.) I did not get the shoe thing at all. The interactions between the actors was good.

    Black Sheep” is hilarious. Highly recommended.

    Oh and this need not be said, but it’s gonna be – Shudder is awesome!!

  17. bioman666 says

    Spaceman, with Adam Sandler, while perhaps not realistic, at least depicts aranea in a positive light, IMO.