Some men’s magazine was planning a cheesy promotion: they were going to include inflatable breasts with an issue. Sad news, though: the crate has been lost at sea.
There is some speculation that pirates are responsible. Very lonely, tasteless pirates.
I have a suspicion that that photo of squid guts in the last post is going to make a few people feel squeamish, and now I’m going to show something even worse: Bill O’Reilly. <cue frantic screams from everyone…”More squid guts! Please! Anything but Billo!”>
Of course Billo is outraged at the news from Washington state. How dare they allow atheists to express themselves? This is a Judeo-Christian nation, and only Christians are allowed to have a voice in the public square (Jews, too, as long as they’re quiet and willing to pretend that they’re pre-Christians).
He urges his listeners to howl dementedly at Governor Gregoire. I may not have quite the reach of Mr Falafel, but I’ll suggest that you write polite, supportive letters to Gregoire as an antidote. If you want a little instant gratification, there’s also a poll to crash: Under freedom of expression do you approve of the atheist representation at the State Capitol?. It’s split 51:49 right now.
So you’ve got a 30lb. squid. What are you going to do with it? Follow along with the photo guide and turn it into something delicious.
I’ll believe them when I see them. Greg Laden says we should all vote on this idea: that we ought to rather thoroughly revamp how science is taught in this country by setting national science standards on the teaching of evolution. I’d like to see it if it could be done well, but I predict that such an initiative would set up some awesome squealing from the creationists…which is another reason to support it.
The temperatures here in Morris are dropping into the single digits °F, snow is on the ground and probably not going away until the spring, and the lakes are all frozen over — we spotted our first icehouse on Lake Minnewaska last weekend. So what does that mean? I’m flying south this weekend, to Orlando, Florida!
I’ll be speaking at the University of Central Florida on Friday, 5 December, at 7pm in Communications Building 101. Afterwards, we tentatively plan to adjourn to the Lazy Moon for refreshments — we can’t be certain because it’s a pizza place in a college town, so we may not be able to squeeze in, depending on how many show up. I’ll post an update if we have to move elsewhere.
On Saturday, 6 December, I’ll be speaking at Rollins College, at 6:30pm in Crummer Hall. I don’t have specific post-babbling plans there, yet, so perhaps someone can suggest something.
I fly away, mission accomplished, on Pearl Harbor day, that Sunday. I have to be a little concerned, though, that the shock of traveling from Florida to frigid Minnesota might be a bit dangerous. I’ll step off the plane in my flip-flops and bermudas and Hawaiian shirt and shatter from the shock. That means this might be the last time anyone gets to see me, so you better show up.
It’s exactly the same, except it’s about atheists instead of Jews. Funny, but also grating.
Yeah, poor Ken — he’s still distressed that his attempt to prop up his credibility with the Cincinnati Zoo’s was foiled. He’s also complaining about an “atheist (a professor from the University of Minnesota-Morris)” who engineered his defeat. I wonder who that might be?
Even more foolishly, though, he cites an online poll to back up his claims.
The news website NKY.com (http://nky.cincinnati.com/) ran an online poll on the controversy. They gave the following options:
YES–The museum promotes a religious point of view that conflicts with the zoo’s scientific mission.
NO–The promotion does not mean that the zoo endorses the museum or that the museum endorses the zoo.
As of last night, 86% voted “NO–The promotion does not mean that the zoo endorses the museum or that the museum endorses the zoo.” I know this is not a statistically valid poll, but I think it does show, as we have seen many times before, that most people are not intolerant. Sadly, it is an intolerant minority that can intimidate people to give in on matters they should take a stand on.
Crazy innumerate wacko. He notes that it is not “statistically valid”, and then in the same sentence claims it “does show”. No, it doesn’t, Ken. All it shows is that creationist fans beat science fans to this particular poll.
But we can fix that, can’t we, boys and girls?
The poll currently stands at 17% yes, 83% no, with a bit over 400 votes total. I suspect we can scramble that all around within an hour.
It’s a very happy song.
The resolution is a little too pat, though. One thing we’ve learned from the last 20 years is that people will gladly vote against their economic well-being to support bizarre social values.
It’s December, and Squidmas is coming. Maybe you’re like me, and the kids have all moved out, so you’re thinking having a little intelligent life at home would be nice. Or maybe you’re kids are still home, and you think they’d love a pretty pet. Or maybe you just love cephalopods, as do we all, so you’re thinking, hey, let’s get an aquarium and an octopus! What a fun idea!
One word of advice: NO. Don’t do it. You can’t just rush into these things.
Here’s a positive suggestion, though. Start reading TONMO, the octopus news magazine online, regularly. If you haven’t been reading it already, you aren’t worthy of owning a cephalopod anyway. If you start dreaming about tentacles, then maybe you can consider feeding your obsession by planning to get a cephalopod of your own.
Second positive suggestion: buy a copy of Cephalopods: Octopuses and Cuttlefishes for the Home Aquarium(amzn/b&n/abe/pwll) by Colin Dunlop and Nancy King. This is essential. All in one place and in a very practical way, it describes all the important information you’ll need to successfully keep a cephalopod in your home, and it may discourage all but the most fervent. Here are a few of the reasons you should not try to keep cephalopods, gleaned from this book and my reading of TONMO.
They are difficult to raise. You will need a well-maintained salt water aquarium, which with all the apparatus required can be quite expensive, and you will need to invest a fair amount of time every day in maintenance. This is a job for a serious aquarist.
They need live foods. What this means for most of us is that you’ll need two tanks — one for the octopus and another to raise the octopus’s food.
A cephalopod’s life is one of heart-breaking brevity. They do not live for long, even in the wild, so no matter what, you’re going to have a pet funeral every six months to a year.
There are few species that you can keep. Most can’t live in the confines of a tank, a few are very dangerous, and many are rare, and it would be unethical to strip natural environments of these precious specimens.
It will eat just about anything else you try to put in the aquarium. The cephalopod and its food will be the only creatures you will have.
Forget keeping one as a pet—a cephalopod in the house is your Lord and Master, and you will serve it everyday. Forget those silly ideas that this will be your little pal, it is going to rule you.
If you aren’t yet discouraged, then you know your proper place in the universe and can consider getting a cephalopod. In order to figure out how to do so, you will first have to buy this book: it contains all the information you will need to proceed. Plus, it’s beautifully illustrated with photographs of the beloved class, so you’ll enjoy reading it, and it therefore makes an excellent Squidmas gift. Then what you may do is purchase a salt-water aquarium and supplies, but at first you should only raise something boring, like damselfish. Master the art of maintaining a stable aquarium for at least a year, and then you may consider obtaining a cephalopod for it. Conceivably, then, you could have one for next Squidmas. But don’t even dream of it yet.
