Y’know -like- uh, it’s like that Buffy Episode, y’know where -like- everybody was singing ‘cuz Zander called on that Broadyway Demon-guy and-uh- like i forgot what i was saying…
Oh yeah, -like- spoofing IDiots in song ROCKS!!!
Bradsays
Pretty much because Ben Stein is such a Big Fucking IDiot.
Mattsays
“You may say Ben Stein’s a schemer
But he’s not the only one
Many a fool would destroy us
A new Dark Age will have begun
Imagine no progression
Evolution canned
No need for artful discussions
A devaluing of man
Imagine all the children
Burning all the books…
You may say I’m a boomer
And my time will fade away
I hope someday you’ll stand up
And keep ignorance at bay.”
Those lyrics are excellent. Someone should mail them to Stein. You hear that, Ben? You fucking lunatic?
Somewhat OT, but definitely related to the topic, here’s a pretty good analysis of the contrarian, denialist tendencies of the IDiots, as well as a host of other conspiracies and pseudosciences:
One of the more religious types I work with (and there are many) just came in all excited about the commercial he saw on Comedy Central for Expelled. All I could do was laugh. He caught me after reading the lyrics linked to above.
Oh well.
Chris Petronisays
“Cheer up, selfish gene,
Oh what can it mean,
To an ID believer
And an old drama queen?”
Hmmm… previous url was mangled. Try this one: Pimpfn
AlanWCansays
You know, I actually heard a xtian mangling of Imagine on some fundie radio channel (the guys remodelling our house listen to some xtian radio station Oy!), where they replaced the lyrics with “Imagine one religion” and I think something like “hell below us/above us only god”
It was more nauseating than most of the self-congratulatory pablum they play on there. I’ll be glad when they’re done (and yes I’m well aware of the whole xtian carpenters thing, isn’t that funny. Maybe I should get a few crucifixes installed for good measure?)
Carliesays
I will never be able to listen to Bohemian Rhapsody the same way again.
#6: “Robot Monster” is certainly a horrible excuse for a movie, but it isn’t an Ed Wood – it was directed by Phil Tucker, and written by Wyott Ordung. If anything, it’s ever so slightly *worse* than the stuff Ed Wood wrote and directed.
Forrest Princesays
Somewhere
Out in the movies
Stein’s a boob
He’s being exposed and expelled
Maybe this time for good.
(Sincerest apologies to Judy Garland)
tintinsays
OT, and apologies if I’ve missed the post, but where oh where has the God of Biscuits’ Gospel gone?
Oh, great. YECs versus the MAFIAA. One group of greedy, hard-right cretins against another.
I have a bad feeling about this.
Ativansays
Got a charge out of this, on the “Expelled” website: “It’s (EXPELLED) going to appeal strongly to the religious, the paranoid, the conspiracy theorists, and the ignorant — which means they’re going to draw in about 90% of the American market.”
-Atheist blogger and fabulist PZ Myers, on a film he has not yet seen.
Definition of chutzpah: blocking a person from seeing a movie, then criticizing him for not seeing it.
hmcsays
Bob Jones U. jokes always make me laugh.
Richsays
Look at me, I’m Billy D
Expert on complexity
But you all laugh
’cause I can’t do the math…
I can’t, I’m Billy D!
Why don’t you engage the substance of Ben’s statements, instead of mocking him?
Glen, engaging Ben Stein’s “arguments” requires mocking him. If these were the arguments of a child or mentally incapable person, they would demand serious response. But they’re not. And as such, they require our laughter.
Well, they’re better than mine were. OTOH, mine took 10 seconds to “compose.”
Yup, and I’m such a trendsetter, too.
As a public service, I’ll let you try to find the one I wrote. No URL. Like telling people, “You won’t believe what I read on Town Hall. Nope, I’m not giving you the URL. In fact, I have to go wash my eyes out with soap now.”
Um, you know I was joking (at least by now), don’t you Mavaddat?
Moving on, this seems to meet the ethical specifications of the Expelled sleazeballs:
Ticket stubs benefit school
MOSINEE — Wisconsin Valley Lutheran High School is collecting ticket stubs from “Expelled,” and will receive a donation for each stub turned in by May 2.
The movie “Expelled” opens in theaters Friday. It addresses the subject of evolution in schools through the eyes of a character who is studying intelligent design.
Mail movie ticket stubs to WVLHS, 601 Maple Ridge Road, Mosinee WI 54455.
I am the very model of a devious creationist
I’ve made a film that’s best described as stolen-animationist
I know the use of rhetoric when facts are unavailable
To render the impossible into the unassailable
I’m very well acquainted, too, with data manufacturing
I’ll claim I stand on solid granite even as it’s fracturing
I document complexity, like when it’s irreducible…
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
I’m very good at lying, both the verbal and statistical–
Like Darwin in his later years, I’m openly theistical
In short, you might describe me as a mental masturbationist
I am the very model of a devious creationist
(that will have to do for now… if I take the time to finish it, we’ll be on comment 600… Perhaps I will complete it and put it up on my own site…)
-Atheist blogger and fabulist PZ Myers, on a film he has not yet seen.
But they didn’t forget to thank you in the credits.
(And they forgot to mention that in addition to being an Atheist blogger and “fabulist” that you are a very reputable biologist! Assholes. why-i-oughta!)
Damien Trotter aka missus_gumbysays
Here’s one I recently tossed-off in the Caribbean:
The Atheist Stonecutters Song.
Who puts the thorns in Jesus’ Crown?
Who keeps the fundy system down?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Naz’reth off the map?
Who thinks religion’s a bunch of crap?
We do! We do!
Who with creationists like to spar?
Who makes Dawkins a global star?
We do! We do!
Who points out the biblical shite?
Who proves that evolution’s right?
We do! Weeeee dooooo!
rpennersays
Does anyone have a URL to that tickets for dollars promotion? I seem to remember it had weasel words that they will exchanges tickets for money as funds allow. So if they didn’t allocate funds past the promised $10,000 top-prize then most of the dupes will receive only a no-prize. Indeed, if Yoko Ono, Harvard, XVIVO, etc. sue them into chapter 7, then even the $10,000 may not have to be paid.
We need a recognition signal if we see each other at the movies this weekend. I would proposed carrying a package of shredded squid jerky in honor of PZ, but most theaters crackdown on outside food, and only in Morris and Ipswitch do the movie vendors cater to the squid-friendly.
Billsays
#37 rpenner –
If you are going to the movies this weekend, I’d recommend carrying flyers that say: “Ben Stein Lies http://www.expelledexposed.com“.
That should make it easy to recognize each other.
Cuttlefish – You! Are! AWESOME!
Ericsays
My google adwords campaign recently ran out of money and I’ve decided against adding any more funds. Hopefully at least one person googling for ‘expelled’ (or any of the other terms listed below [see image]) saw the teaser for the ExpelledExposed.com site, clicked on it and got the full story.
* I’m not affiliated with NCSE.org or the ExpelledExposed.com site, I just thought I’d donate some free advertising their way.
MikeMsays
Cuttlefish, I recognize that tune.
Tom Lehrer’s “Elements”.
Right?
You… you… Plagiarist!
(Someone had to do it.)
Ericsays
ps. For a while, the ad for ExpelledExposed.com was sitting up there at the number one sponsored position (listed before the search results and highlighted in yellow) when you searched for ‘expelled’ at google.com. It was even listed before the ExpelledTheMovie.com website. I thought that was pretty funny. :)
* I have no idea how google adwords chooses the positioning for it’s ads. It seemed to choose random CPC (cost per click) values and ad positions. It’s sort of like playing the slot machines…
Actually, that’s the “Modern Major-General” from Gilbert & Sullivan’s “HMS Pinafore”.
Cuttlefish–I was so inspired I had to go out and write one too, to the tune of “Hotel California” Here’s part of it:
Ben Stein was explaining
Why prof Gene took a dive
What he took 90 minutes to say
He could have told us in five
And still teh crazy it burns all across the land
Doesn’t bother the DI folks though
Sure they’re feeling grand
Welcome to Expelled (from Acadamia)
Yeah it’s got Ben Stein
And his monowhine
Yes we’re oh-so-fair in Expelled (from Acadamia)
Why just look at who’s
In our interviews
The whole thing’s at my place, but don’t waste your time–visit Da Cuttlefish.
Hairy Doctor Professorsays
Cuttlefish: (that will have to do for now… if I take the time to finish it, we’ll be on comment 600… Perhaps I will complete it and put it up on my own site…)
Please – no more! I’m in serious danger of contracting Pharyngulitis – or becoming a Pharyngulaholic, or something. I’ve heard there are some other web pages on the Internet somewhere, but I just can’t seem to drag myself away from here…
MikeM – go and stand in the corner! Cuttlefish (and Tom Lehrer’s Elements) are both parodies of “I am the very model of a modern Major General” from Gilbert & Sullivan’s Pirates of Penzance (No, not Pinafore either). Cuttlefish – you HAVE to finish that, it’s brilliant.
I might even have a go at doing a Jabberwocky version!
When I copy and they tell me “desist”,
Gonna go to the place that’s the best
When I get caught in a lie,
Goin’ up to designers in the sky
Goin’ up to designers in the sky
That’s where I’m gonna go when I lie
When I lie and they tell me desist
Gonna go to the place that’s the best
DJ actions might come a bust
Gotta have a friend in Jesus
So you know that when you lie
He’s gonna recommend you
To designers in the sky
Gonna recommend you
To designers in the sky
That’s where you’re gonna go when you lie
Steal in God’s name but they tell you desist
You’re gonna go to the place that’s the best
I sorta copied and I maybe infringed
I got a friend in Jesus
So you know that when I lie
He’s gonna set me up with
Designers in the sky
Oh set me up with designers in the sky
They’ll protect me when I lie
Texas judges might not let me rest
But Designers will protect me the best
Gonna go to the place that’s the best.
[Insert awestruck applause for Cuttlefish here. Damn.]
Hairy Doctor Professorsays
Cuttlefish: your tip-jar is what will induce me to finally set up a PayPal account, and I will visit it before too much longer. I encourage other readers herein to do likewise. You’ve earned it many times over. (A bow of deep respect.)
Take care of that headache, for you know all too well that you will be called upon again for your insights in times of need, as we once needed Gary Larson (and still do).
Glen Davidson says
Why don’t you engage the substance of Ben’s statements, instead of mocking him?
You know, like how because of Darwinism there’s no allowance for questioning why planets orbit as they do, something that has no explanation…
Oh, uh, never mind.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
Jsn says
Y’know -like- uh, it’s like that Buffy Episode, y’know where -like- everybody was singing ‘cuz Zander called on that Broadyway Demon-guy and-uh- like i forgot what i was saying…
Oh yeah, -like- spoofing IDiots in song ROCKS!!!
Brad says
Pretty much because Ben Stein is such a Big Fucking IDiot.
Matt says
“You may say Ben Stein’s a schemer
But he’s not the only one
Many a fool would destroy us
A new Dark Age will have begun
Imagine no progression
Evolution canned
No need for artful discussions
A devaluing of man
Imagine all the children
Burning all the books…
You may say I’m a boomer
And my time will fade away
I hope someday you’ll stand up
And keep ignorance at bay.”
Those lyrics are excellent. Someone should mail them to Stein. You hear that, Ben? You fucking lunatic?
Robster, FCD says
PeeeeZeeeee. PEEEEEEZEEEEEEE! PEEEEEZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
bangs head
caerbannog says
A Rottentomato.com comparison:
Howard the Duck: 19%
Ishtar: 19%
Showgirls: 14%
The Robot Monster (directed by Ed Wood): 27%
..and… drum-roll……
Expelled: 9%!
Congratulations are in order all around!!
Glen Davidson says
Somewhat OT, but definitely related to the topic, here’s a pretty good analysis of the contrarian, denialist tendencies of the IDiots, as well as a host of other conspiracies and pseudosciences:
http://www.slate.com/id/2189178/entry/0/
Glen D
HP says
Cheer up, selfish gene,
Oh what can it mean,
To an ID believer
And an old drama queen?
Rev. BigDumbChimp says
One of the more religious types I work with (and there are many) just came in all excited about the commercial he saw on Comedy Central for Expelled. All I could do was laugh. He caught me after reading the lyrics linked to above.
Oh well.
Chris Petroni says
“Cheer up, selfish gene,
Oh what can it mean,
To an ID believer
And an old drama queen?”
Awesome! More please!
bron says
Ben Stein
Ben Stein’s pimpf’n fine!
bron says
Hmmm… previous url was mangled. Try this one:
Pimpfn
AlanWCan says
You know, I actually heard a xtian mangling of Imagine on some fundie radio channel (the guys remodelling our house listen to some xtian radio station Oy!), where they replaced the lyrics with “Imagineone religion” and I think something like “hell below us/above us only god ”
It was more nauseating than most of the self-congratulatory pablum they play on there. I’ll be glad when they’re done (and yes I’m well aware of the whole xtian carpenters thing, isn’t that funny. Maybe I should get a few crucifixes installed for good measure?)
Carlie says
I will never be able to listen to Bohemian Rhapsody the same way again.
tceisele says
#6: “Robot Monster” is certainly a horrible excuse for a movie, but it isn’t an Ed Wood – it was directed by Phil Tucker, and written by Wyott Ordung. If anything, it’s ever so slightly *worse* than the stuff Ed Wood wrote and directed.
Forrest Prince says
Somewhere
Out in the movies
Stein’s a boob
He’s being exposed and expelled
Maybe this time for good.
(Sincerest apologies to Judy Garland)
tintin says
OT, and apologies if I’ve missed the post, but where oh where has the God of Biscuits’ Gospel gone?
Amanda says
“Imagine all the country
Dumber than a post…”
This had me laughing out loud…in my office.
Emmet Caulfield says
But Intelligent Design explains why the planets don’t just fall down (@~2:40).
Jonathan says
Oh, great. YECs versus the MAFIAA. One group of greedy, hard-right cretins against another.
I have a bad feeling about this.
Ativan says
Got a charge out of this, on the “Expelled” website: “It’s (EXPELLED) going to appeal strongly to the religious, the paranoid, the conspiracy theorists, and the ignorant — which means they’re going to draw in about 90% of the American market.”
-Atheist blogger and fabulist PZ Myers, on a film he has not yet seen.
Definition of chutzpah: blocking a person from seeing a movie, then criticizing him for not seeing it.
hmc says
Bob Jones U. jokes always make me laugh.
Rich says
Look at me, I’m Billy D
Expert on complexity
But you all laugh
’cause I can’t do the math…
I can’t, I’m Billy D!
PS KRISTINE IS A WITCH.
Alex says
#1 Glen,
With regards to the planetary orbits…
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39512
Come on. Now I know we must all know this to be true. Geesh.
Mavaddat says
Glen Davidson writes,
Glen, engaging Ben Stein’s “arguments” requires mocking him. If these were the arguments of a child or mentally incapable person, they would demand serious response. But they’re not. And as such, they require our laughter.
mjs says
Ooh! I am everyone! Tat tvam asi!
++++
Martin says
Where’s Cuttlefish in all this?
MikeM says
Well, they’re better than mine were. OTOH, mine took 10 seconds to “compose.”
Yup, and I’m such a trendsetter, too.
As a public service, I’ll let you try to find the one I wrote. No URL. Like telling people, “You won’t believe what I read on Town Hall. Nope, I’m not giving you the URL. In fact, I have to go wash my eyes out with soap now.”
Glen Davidson says
Um, you know I was joking (at least by now), don’t you Mavaddat?
Moving on, this seems to meet the ethical specifications of the Expelled sleazeballs:
It’s in the Bible, you reap what you sow, Ruloff, Stein, Mathis, and Miller.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
Mavaddat says
Sorry, I’m new here.
Glen Davidson says
Is perfectly all right.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
karen says
Both sets of revised lyrics ROCK! Love the homage to Peezee, peeeeeeeZEEEEEEEEEEE!
Elyse says
Peeeeeee Zeeeeeeeee
Peeeeeeeeeeeeeee Zeeeeeeeeeeeeee
PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<3 my PZ.
Cuttlefish, OM says
For you, Martin@#27–
I am the very model of a devious creationist
I’ve made a film that’s best described as stolen-animationist
I know the use of rhetoric when facts are unavailable
To render the impossible into the unassailable
I’m very well acquainted, too, with data manufacturing
I’ll claim I stand on solid granite even as it’s fracturing
I document complexity, like when it’s irreducible…
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
And think my movie’s in the league of Arthur Miller’s Crucible
I’m very good at lying, both the verbal and statistical–
Like Darwin in his later years, I’m openly theistical
In short, you might describe me as a mental masturbationist
I am the very model of a devious creationist
(that will have to do for now… if I take the time to finish it, we’ll be on comment 600… Perhaps I will complete it and put it up on my own site…)
Elyse says
-Atheist blogger and fabulist PZ Myers, on a film he has not yet seen.
But they didn’t forget to thank you in the credits.
(And they forgot to mention that in addition to being an Atheist blogger and “fabulist” that you are a very reputable biologist! Assholes. why-i-oughta!)
Damien Trotter aka missus_gumby says
Here’s one I recently tossed-off in the Caribbean:
The Atheist Stonecutters Song.
Who puts the thorns in Jesus’ Crown?
Who keeps the fundy system down?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Naz’reth off the map?
Who thinks religion’s a bunch of crap?
We do! We do!
Who with creationists like to spar?
Who makes Dawkins a global star?
We do! We do!
Who points out the biblical shite?
Who proves that evolution’s right?
We do! Weeeee dooooo!
rpenner says
Does anyone have a URL to that tickets for dollars promotion? I seem to remember it had weasel words that they will exchanges tickets for money as funds allow. So if they didn’t allocate funds past the promised $10,000 top-prize then most of the dupes will receive only a no-prize. Indeed, if Yoko Ono, Harvard, XVIVO, etc. sue them into chapter 7, then even the $10,000 may not have to be paid.
We need a recognition signal if we see each other at the movies this weekend. I would proposed carrying a package of shredded squid jerky in honor of PZ, but most theaters crackdown on outside food, and only in Morris and Ipswitch do the movie vendors cater to the squid-friendly.
Bill says
#37 rpenner –
If you are going to the movies this weekend, I’d recommend carrying flyers that say: “Ben Stein Lies http://www.expelledexposed.com“.
That should make it easy to recognize each other.
Cuttlefish – You! Are! AWESOME!
Eric says
My google adwords campaign recently ran out of money and I’ve decided against adding any more funds. Hopefully at least one person googling for ‘expelled’ (or any of the other terms listed below [see image]) saw the teaser for the ExpelledExposed.com site, clicked on it and got the full story.
http://img508.imageshack.us/my.php?image=expelledexposedgoogleadwk4.jpg
* I’m not affiliated with NCSE.org or the ExpelledExposed.com site, I just thought I’d donate some free advertising their way.
MikeM says
Cuttlefish, I recognize that tune.
Tom Lehrer’s “Elements”.
Right?
You… you… Plagiarist!
(Someone had to do it.)
Eric says
ps. For a while, the ad for ExpelledExposed.com was sitting up there at the number one sponsored position (listed before the search results and highlighted in yellow) when you searched for ‘expelled’ at google.com. It was even listed before the ExpelledTheMovie.com website. I thought that was pretty funny. :)
* I have no idea how google adwords chooses the positioning for it’s ads. It seemed to choose random CPC (cost per click) values and ad positions. It’s sort of like playing the slot machines…
Metro says
Actually, that’s the “Modern Major-General” from Gilbert & Sullivan’s “HMS Pinafore”.
Cuttlefish–I was so inspired I had to go out and write one too, to the tune of “Hotel California” Here’s part of it:
Ben Stein was explaining
Why prof Gene took a dive
What he took 90 minutes to say
He could have told us in five
And still teh crazy it burns all across the land
Doesn’t bother the DI folks though
Sure they’re feeling grand
Welcome to Expelled (from Acadamia)
Yeah it’s got Ben Stein
And his monowhine
Yes we’re oh-so-fair in Expelled (from Acadamia)
Why just look at who’s
In our interviews
The whole thing’s at my place, but don’t waste your time–visit Da Cuttlefish.
Hairy Doctor Professor says
Cuttlefish: (that will have to do for now… if I take the time to finish it, we’ll be on comment 600… Perhaps I will complete it and put it up on my own site…)
Oh, yes, please (pathetic whine).
Elwood Herring says
Please – no more! I’m in serious danger of contracting Pharyngulitis – or becoming a Pharyngulaholic, or something. I’ve heard there are some other web pages on the Internet somewhere, but I just can’t seem to drag myself away from here…
MikeM – go and stand in the corner! Cuttlefish (and Tom Lehrer’s Elements) are both parodies of “I am the very model of a modern Major General” from Gilbert & Sullivan’s Pirates of Penzance (No, not Pinafore either). Cuttlefish – you HAVE to finish that, it’s brilliant.
I might even have a go at doing a Jabberwocky version!
Martin says
Cuttlefish, I believe you need your own fan club.
Carlie says
OT, and apologies if I’ve missed the post, but where oh where has the God of Biscuits’ Gospel gone?
Oh no! Hopefully it’s that he’s focusing on his dissertation for awhile. :(
MikeM says
D’oh, you’re right.
Corner. Standing. Can I come out now?
(But can’t you picture Stein? “Hah! And they call us plagiarists? He didn’t even try to disguise it!”)
He’d say it without the “Hah!” though. That spoils the monotonous flow.
MikeM says
By the way, Edward Douglas’s review is absolutely idiotic.
http://www.comingsoon.net/news/reviewsnews.php?id=44147
You can respond to his comments there.
Longtime Lurker says
We’re all living in Cuttle’s world now!
Elwood Herring says
Good grief, I can’t believe that I’m only the second person ever to use the word pharyngulitis according to google!
Elwood Herring says
Well, second and< ./i> third now, obviously…
Katrina says
Has anyone checked to see if EMI and George Thorogood have given their permission for “Bad to the Bone”? I’m starting to wonder.
Laura Quilter says
When I copy and they tell me “desist”,
Gonna go to the place that’s the best
When I get caught in a lie,
Goin’ up to designers in the sky
Goin’ up to designers in the sky
That’s where I’m gonna go when I lie
When I lie and they tell me desist
Gonna go to the place that’s the best
DJ actions might come a bust
Gotta have a friend in Jesus
So you know that when you lie
He’s gonna recommend you
To designers in the sky
Gonna recommend you
To designers in the sky
That’s where you’re gonna go when you lie
Steal in God’s name but they tell you desist
You’re gonna go to the place that’s the best
I sorta copied and I maybe infringed
I got a friend in Jesus
So you know that when I lie
He’s gonna set me up with
Designers in the sky
Oh set me up with designers in the sky
They’ll protect me when I lie
Texas judges might not let me rest
But Designers will protect me the best
Gonna go to the place that’s the best.
Cuttlefish, OM says
Ok, it is done!
Can I have my brain back now?
It needs a stiff drink
http://digitalcuttlefish.blogspot.com/2008/04/i-am-very-model-of-devious-creationist.html
sublunary says
[Insert awestruck applause for Cuttlefish here. Damn.]
Hairy Doctor Professor says
Cuttlefish: your tip-jar is what will induce me to finally set up a PayPal account, and I will visit it before too much longer. I encourage other readers herein to do likewise. You’ve earned it many times over. (A bow of deep respect.)
Take care of that headache, for you know all too well that you will be called upon again for your insights in times of need, as we once needed Gary Larson (and still do).