Jesus Christ has returned to Earth! He returned on Palm Sunday, April 1, 2012. Palm Sunday is a sacred day in the Christian Religion It is one week before Easter Sunday when Jesus, the Christ, was said by Christians to have recovered from being dead. On Palm Sunday, Jesus rode into Jerusalem on an ass, while followers threw palm fronds in his path.
The promised reappearance of Jesus occurred at Independence, Missouri, where prophesied.
Throughout the world, the effect was instant and electric. His Holiness the Pope has stepped down from his golden throne and given his seat to the Messiah, who also took over control of all church property, banks, and other holdings. Jesus said these must be liquidated and the proceeds given to the poor.
Jesus said the new rules are still the old rules, with the Sermon on the Mount suggested as a summary and guide. The Lord brought specific attention to the rules requiring penitence and prayer to be undertaken only in private, not public, settings. In the U.S., the Department of Science has been transformed into the Department of Miracles and the Department of Education has become the Department of Dogma, with Ken Ham as its new chairman. All teachings of science, or other heresies, have been abandoned in favor of a biblical based orientation to the truth.
All war has ceased. Bibles are being dusted off and read. Persons heretofore de-baptized are being re-baptized in record numbers.
American Atheists has been disbanded. David Silverman, President of American Atheists, said the decision was the only rational option, with the Second Person of the Triune God, the Son, having now appeared in Harry Truman’s home town.
More on this fast breaking story right after “Survivor.”
Edwin
Edwin Kagin © 2012.
Can I have some of what you were snorting?
Ha! 98.5% sure that there is no god, you guys were?
Whose ass is grass now?
Yours is, for one. So is PZ’s. Dawkins is a doner, also, I suppose. The list goes on.
I guess there’s no point hanging around atheists blogs any longer, trying to influence the godless. So, I guess I’ll say one last goodbye and go hook up with the return party.
Thank you for allowing me a voice on your blog. You were an excellent host.
But my chariot awaits me now.
So long, friend.
Palm Fools Day has been very good to me.
Ooh…Jesus! He’s important. Can you put the atheist blog on hold and lead us into prayer every April 1st?
The atheism was encouraged this age and the fancies about Christ deviated from the truth. I lived as atheist 32 years after long search in the truth. But in a great moment I experienced the connection with the Universal Spirit and got the facts bit by bit. I changed 180 degree and I knew that fairy tale about the return of Christ is wrong. I represent the second advent of Christ due to facts shown in my blog “Why I am Christ Returned” Read it free but without presupposition. I’d like to see your comments on the 32 articles. I hope of all the atheists to join me to be the majors of the new mission and stir the peoples for ever peace. Please no presupposition and start from the first article to see how the Christ always comes to the world by the projection of the holy words. Peace!