A poetry slam, I refused,
For bad rhymes, I’m not amused;
A sad portent augural,
That all would be doggerel,
And the language would be abused.
Cutty Snarksays
Well, I’ll have a go (and I hope this isn’t too offensive – please do delete if it crosses the line from gentle fun):
A Professor from Morris declared with some grace,
“What I seek is a squid’s embrace –
for a chitinous beak
must be ecstasy’s peak,
and enveloped in tentacles is my safe space!”
Cutty Snarksays
(though surely iambic pentameter would be the most suitable scheme for salaciousness?)
O boy!
I “ran” a poetry slam for 2 years!
I never could get the hang of battling.
I never got those “Your mother is SO ____!!!” type battles either.
Mazel Tov to those that can.
I just don’t understand the point of being intentionally mean.
lumipunasays
Isn’t this basically a wizard spell-casting contest?
birgerjohanssonsays
I recognise Tom Gauld from his one-panel cartoons in New Scientist. He is consistently good, rather like SMBC and xkcd, but with a different sense of humor.
birgerjohanssonsays
A poetry slam is when a poet rigs up an anvil to fall down on a rival poet.
stroppysays
“Gray-visaged gallows-bird, out of your wits gone wild,
Loathsome and lousy, as wet as a cress,
Since you with worship would so fain be styled,
Hail, Monsignor! Your balls droop below your dress.”
Do not reveal you’re one bad poet
If there’s doubt do not remove it
If you write it they will know it
If you post it that will prove it
Rich Woodssays
@lumipuna #6:
“F…f…f…fireball!”
Nemosays
How about a simple desultory philippic?
DonDueedsays
Nemo @12: The man ain’t got no cultyah.
pilghamsays
This looks like “The Last Word”, a pretty fun game on Steam that my daughter bought for me.
Features
Unique battle system! Fight with the subtle nuances of conversation.
Engaging storytelling! Get whisked away by a narrative brimming with character! And fun!
Key Topic System! Gather gossip to unlock more… gossip!
Vocal SFX! Each character has their own awe-inducing sound. Listen to the quality of that throat clearing!
Bow Ties! Learn skills and equip them using snazzy Bow Tie Points!
Down from the north came one-eyed Mick
The only man alive with a corkscrew ,,,,
No that’s too rude .
There once was a man from Belgrade
Who kept a dead ,,.
No that’s even ruder .
I am all out of rhymes
Blame it on the boogie ,
or even on the times .
Can’t seem to scan .
Like A E Houseman can .
And as for Yeats ,
I am not up to his feats .
billseymoursays
Cutty Snark @4:
(though surely iambic pentameter would be the most suitable scheme for salaciousness?)
When engaging with bloggers it’s best
To keep peevishness close to one’s vest;
Yet to risk being rude,
I’m compelled to include
A degenerate anapest.
Cutty Snarksays
billseymour @ 16
:-)
Though I hope I’ve not acted peeved
your wisdom is kindly received;
so perhaps I’d best cease lest I
make an assonance of my-
self and leave feeling grieved!
UnknownEric the Apostate says
There once was a man in Morris / err, something something porous?
I’m no poet.
Intransitive says
A poetry slam, I refused,
For bad rhymes, I’m not amused;
A sad portent augural,
That all would be doggerel,
And the language would be abused.
Cutty Snark says
Well, I’ll have a go (and I hope this isn’t too offensive – please do delete if it crosses the line from gentle fun):
A Professor from Morris declared with some grace,
“What I seek is a squid’s embrace –
for a chitinous beak
must be ecstasy’s peak,
and enveloped in tentacles is my safe space!”
Cutty Snark says
(though surely iambic pentameter would be the most suitable scheme for salaciousness?)
dragonessfredriksson says
O boy!
I “ran” a poetry slam for 2 years!
I never could get the hang of battling.
I never got those “Your mother is SO ____!!!” type battles either.
Mazel Tov to those that can.
I just don’t understand the point of being intentionally mean.
lumipuna says
Isn’t this basically a wizard spell-casting contest?
birgerjohansson says
I recognise Tom Gauld from his one-panel cartoons in New Scientist. He is consistently good, rather like SMBC and xkcd, but with a different sense of humor.
birgerjohansson says
A poetry slam is when a poet rigs up an anvil to fall down on a rival poet.
stroppy says
“Gray-visaged gallows-bird, out of your wits gone wild,
Loathsome and lousy, as wet as a cress,
Since you with worship would so fain be styled,
Hail, Monsignor! Your balls droop below your dress.”
The Flyting of Dunbar and Kennedy
https://intranslation.brooklynrail.org/middle-scots/the-flyting-of-dunbar-and-kennedy/
imback says
Do not reveal you’re one bad poet
If there’s doubt do not remove it
If you write it they will know it
If you post it that will prove it
Rich Woods says
@lumipuna #6:
“F…f…f…fireball!”
Nemo says
How about a simple desultory philippic?
DonDueed says
Nemo @12: The man ain’t got no cultyah.
pilgham says
This looks like “The Last Word”, a pretty fun game on Steam that my daughter bought for me.
It really exists.
https://store.steampowered.com/app/355530/Last_Word/
davidc1 says
Down from the north came one-eyed Mick
The only man alive with a corkscrew ,,,,
No that’s too rude .
There once was a man from Belgrade
Who kept a dead ,,.
No that’s even ruder .
I am all out of rhymes
Blame it on the boogie ,
or even on the times .
Can’t seem to scan .
Like A E Houseman can .
And as for Yeats ,
I am not up to his feats .
billseymour says
Cutty Snark @4:
When engaging with bloggers it’s best
To keep peevishness close to one’s vest;
Yet to risk being rude,
I’m compelled to include
A degenerate anapest.
Cutty Snark says
billseymour @ 16
:-)
Though I hope I’ve not acted peeved
your wisdom is kindly received;
so perhaps I’d best cease lest I
make an assonance of my-
self and leave feeling grieved!