It’s the Foodbabe opining on body chemistry.
For several years, I’ve started my day with warm lemon water and cayenne pepper. Lemon water is very alkaline and can stimulate the liver. It can change your taste buds so you don’t crave sugary foods, and instead crave alkaline ones like fruits and vegetables. The cayenne pepper has been proven to boost your metabolism. But both of those ingredients together strengthen the immune system. I’ve gotten fewer colds because of following this habit. An acidic body promotes disease and inflammation. I try to make my diet mostly alkaline. And with water, you want to make sure it’s not contaminated. Unfortunately, our water is contaminated with everything from chlorine to fluoride.
Wha…? I got momentarily hung up on the Lemon water is very alkaline
nonsense — no, it’s not. It’s acidic. But then I looked this up and there’s a whole lot of freaky websites that claim Once you drink the acidic lemon water, it will become alkaline as your body reacts with the lemons’ anions during the digestive process
and that Inside the body however, when lemon juice has been fully metabolized and its minerals are dissociated in the bloodstream, its effect is alkalizing and therefore raises the pH of body tissue (pH above 7 is alkaline)
. This is crazy talk. Acids don’t turn into bases when metabolized, and no, your tissues don’t normally become more alkaline or more acidic because of what you eat or drink. Your urine will vary in acidity, because the pH of your blood and tissues is rather heavily buffered, and if your blood pH is out of the range of 7.35-7.45, you’ve got serious health problems.
And then I realized — this woman is babbling. The entire package is ignorant bullshit, from the alkaline lemons to the boosting your immune system to the alkaline/acidic body crapola. It’s exactly like dealing with creationists who throw out a dozen lies and then expect you to address them all at length, whereupon they will ignore your answers and throw out a dozen more.
I surrender already. What awesome stupidity.
So… fructose isn’t a sugar now?
Chlorine and fluoride!! How the hell did that get into her water? s/
The last line triggered me: “… contaminated with chlorine and fluoride.” As if those don’t serve any purpose being in there. Clearly, she also does not understand the meaning of “contaminant”. She’s short steps away from emulating Gen. Ripper, obsessed with “Purity Of Essence”; declaring fluoridated water to be poisonous venom. Did she that was a documentary?
“I’ve gotten fewer colds because of following this habit.”
So you’ve done a blind study and are certain this is the cause of the change? And you’re confident that there is actually a change and not just a perception? Are you sure it’s not all the hand sanitizer, exercise, improved diet, etc….
Yeah, I get a lot of folks forwarding me food faddist shit because I’m a Type 1 Diabetic. For some reason, they all seem to be hung up on raw cinnamon.
No thanks, I’ll stick to the stuff that actually works…you know…like Insulin.
So the pH scale has alkaline at one end and sugar at the other, and fruit is firmly on the alkaline end. Learn something new every day!
What does “boost your metabolism” even mean?
My GP is unfortunately addicted to woo. Once she recommended that I took “healing earth” and look and behold, next time my liver values were as good as they hadn’t been in a while.
“See, I told you!”
Only that I had thrown out the slip and completely ignored the recommendadtion…
@7: AFAIK it’s what happens when you exercise, for about as long as you exercise. Cayenne pepper? Well, a good dose of capsins can cause similar-looking symptoms (panting, sweating, facial flushing) but I suspect it’s not quite the same thing.
As a fellow type 1 on Insulin, I certainly remember the thing about blood pH out of whack being very bad. Never happened to me (to the astonishment of my doc), but Ketoacidosis (when the body mostly or exclusively breaks down fat and protein for energy for an extended time, for example because lack of Insulin in a type 1 Diabetic keeps the blood sugar from being used by the cells) does not make you a happy camper (it makes you very, very sick).
As for cayenne pepper boosting the metabolism, anything that makes your food hot enough to make you sweat has thus demonstrated its ability to boost your metabolism. Note, I make no claims as far as how much it boosts it or for how long. Maybe compare sweating-because-spicy-food with sweating-because-exercise to get a very approximate idea how other effects might compare. (And for type 1s, maybe contrast with sweating-because-high-blood-sugar … which, if anything, is bound to have reversed effects.)
>Only that I had thrown out the slip
Genius! Why, you’ve carried homeopathy to a whole new level!! We could call it … homemeopathy: dilute stupid advice that’s (at best) harmless to the point where there’s none left at all, and presto, you get better!!!
If there’s actually been any difference at all, it’s because that happens to be good for soothing throats and loosening congestion. Same reason why an apple cider vinegar/honey/hot water concoction usually makes me feel better when I have a cold. It’s not preventing or curing actual disease.
If there’s chlorine in your water, that is a problem. Chloride not so much. Chlorine is a highly toxic gas, chloride is a fairly inert ion.
As for fluoride, isn’t there a whole bunch of people against fluoridating water because it’s unnatural and part of government brainwashing activity? Never mind the scientific evidence about how it’s good for teeth…
Fluoride in drinking water does nothing to fight cavities. It makes teeth visible to spy satellites. It must be true because The Question said so.
I seem to have had fewer colds in recent years than I used to, and have done nothing to my crappy diet that I could claim caused this. Unless replacing sugar filled soft drinks with aspartame filled ones can prevent colds.
Yees, so we somehow remove the anions leaving behind all those protons and, voila, everything becomes more alkaline. Until somebody points out that the pH scale is essentially a H+ concentration scale and hence everything would actually become more acidic. It’s just as well woo doesn’t work.
Let’s find out with a market-based study*: Now on sale for 99.99$ plus taxes and shipping, the All-You-Can-Eat pepper diet. Eat as much as you like for as long as you like and still lose weight.
Anyone trying this is bound to lose weight, as well as their sense of taste, control over bowel movements and, ultimately, their live.
Not suitable for children under 20 years, or adults over 20 years. Consult your physician before use. Not approved by the FDA, we honestly didn’t bother filling in the application.
*If it doesn’t work the Free Hand Of The Market (TM) will let us know with minimal loss of live and maximal profits for us.
To be fair, I’d be upset too if people were brainwashing me even if it happens to be good for my teeth.
timgueguen@15, Nah. My diet is crappy, too, and my sugar-filled soft drinks are one of my reasons for living. And I haven’t been sick very often the last 8 years or so, either.
Crappy diet, we’re doing it right?
Ugh. I was talking to a dear friend about another friend who won’t use fluoridated water. Her kids have chronic teeth problems and I might have said something rather judgmental. Dear friend looks at me and tells me her family doesn’t like fluoride either. It was like, what? Really? You too??!
–
It can be so personal and emotional to criticize someone for a decision like that. I didn’t even know what to say.
In the past 12 years, since I had radiotherapy on my head and neck, I have had only one cold, and that was just 2 weeks ago. I don’t know if having had radiotherapy improved my luck, or whether the scar tissue left after my head was cooked impedes the ability of a virus to penetrate damaged mucous membranes. However, I have had episodes of bronchitis and pneumonia, but they are more of a chest problem and bacteria based.
I cannot recommend the procedure just to avoid a cold.
Apparently, you can tell if your body is too acid by the way your lemon water tastes when you drink it – if it tastes sour, then your body is too acidic, so you need to drink the lemon water to alkalize it. Which sounds stupidly backwards even for a woo-infused just-so story…
This is why you get creationist dentists. All that intelligently fluoridated water just couldn’t be the product of chance plus time or evil-solution as those afluoridationists call it!
Cayenne pepper, in hot water with black pepper and ginger, does do a fine job of unclogging my sinuses. I throw some lemon juice in for the taste. Of course, if you use too much, it also makes you run around the room screaming.
I once microwaved a sandwich with horseradish cheddar on it. On the first bite I had the impression that fire was running under my scalp, presumably due to horseradish fumes in the sinuses. Tasty, though.
This woman is the same idiot who said not to eat anything with chemicals in it. So this latest really barely pings the re-calibrated moron-meter.
To demonstrate the propaganda I learned of fluoridation: Fluoridated water has minimal effect on fully developed teeth. The effect, of hardening the enamel, occurs during development of teeth. Subdermally (inside the gums) while the person is growing the teeth, before they erupt through the gums to be a functional mastication instrument. [enough jargon there?] That is why having fluoride in the water, to be consumed during tooth development, is so important. Applying fluoride paste onto a developed tooth has much less of an effect (not “zero”, but much much smaller than during development]
corrections welcome.
But did everyone hear? She is one the the 30 Most Influential People on the Internet. Surely that gives her credibility, no?
I do love this line though:
And every time I’ve gotten drunk I’ve suffered zero bear attacks; I’m pretty sure it’s because alcoholic beverages have a bear-repelling that’s just not present when I’m sober (even when I’m armed with some metabolism-boosting cayenne pepper).
Okay, I’ve also never been attacked by a bear, but just try and prove it’s not because of drinking alcohol!
I only got as far as “Lemon water is very alkaline…”. The stupid, it burns.
@26 HPU — well now we’ve got a sample size of two to work with here, as I have also encountered identical results, with a great deal of drunkenness, and not one single mauling. Coincidence? I think not. In fact, the bear protection, in my instance, is likely dose-dependent, from all the evidence.
The very real choice is between water “contaminated” with chlorine, and water contaminated with cholera. I know my preference.
Accelerated aging.
I’ve been using lemon juice in my recipe for curried chicken. First, I marinate the meat in lemon water, then I curdle the milk with lemon juice. I thought that worked because the stuff is acidic. Now the Food Babe makes me think I should switch over to something very alkaline – hmmm, drain cleaner? Hey, it works for herring, and drain cleaner isn’t a chemical name, right?
anbheal @28:
When not protected by alcohol, you have been mauled by bears?
I must join in. I was just going to move on when I saw the anecdata of 2 people who, while drinking, have never been attacked by bears. I can raise that number to 3.
I think we should add our favourite tipple because that could be relevant to future researchers. Vodka martini here, with fresh lemon peel.
Note the lemon. Coincidence? Hardly.
Bear repellant? Martinis? Well, I drink gin martinis, with lemon peel, and I have had close interactions with bears, but never an attack. It is either the alcohol or the lemon or both, I’m convinced.
“Lemon water is very alkaline.”
Is she fucking serious? Lemon water has to be acidic. My chemistry degree and simple kitchen cooking chemistry tells me so. I didn’t read anything else. After a statement like that she has zero credibility.
As far as I can tell her credibility quotient has been consistent.
Alkaline lemons – well there’s something new! Hell, if limewater is alkali surely lemon water should be too?
Sorry I couldn’t read any further – the stupid might contaminate me.
Whoa, I, too, am a martini-with-a-lemon-twist drinker (though I can go either way on vodka or gin) and have never been mauled by a bear, despite them occasionally pooping in my driveway. I’m convinced. There is literally no other possible explanation for this.
Ok. I’ve also never had a bear attack while drinking or somewhat intoxicated. But I drink beer, wine, gin and tonic with lime, scotch, rum, brandy, and good sherry. Sometimes other beverages. We are omnivores when it comes to drink. So teasing the cause and effect out of this could be difficult. The only common denominator is the ethanol. But yeah, safe from bear attacks, for sure.
I eat whatever I like – a few hours ago I bought three ‘meat lovers’ pizzas, a roast chicken and six bottles of Cola, and that will do me for the next few days. I haven’t had a cold for decades and the flu only twice that I can remember. Never been to hospital in my life and to the chemist about once every decade at the most. I’m 70 years old and people think I look about forty. I should write a book…
So, then, citric acid is alkaline. Who knew?
On a more serious note, I sometimes shop at a local “health food store”, mostly for the reason that they have the best selection of herbs and spices in town, and quite often I hear one of the store owners waxing medical to a customer about the miraculous effect of this or that nostrum or another. You have a problem, they have – according to him – a cure for it. It’s total bullshit. When I hear him talk to people like this I want to scream. Call him on his bullshit. But for some reason I don’t. I guess I figure that people’s right to be idiots exceeds my right to call him a fucking idiot in front of others. Bit of a quandary.
She says that lemon juice is alkaline, then that it changes your taste buds to make you crave other alkaline things. I don’t see how that would happen – a thing makes you want more of the same general kind of thing. I mean, one potato chip makes you want more potato chips, yeah, but I think saying that your body is trying to restore balance would be a better story. So lemon juice is acidic, but it happens to really trigger the acid-sensing bits, and that makes you crave alkali for balance. That would be kinda like caffeine being a poison that musters so many defenses that you feel better.
Anyhow, that’s just to say that her story could as easily been the other way. There is no evidence or mechanism, it is just a myth. Are vegetables even alkaline? Because lemons sure ain’t.
(There is a science story where somebody happened to mention to a famous physicist that they had noticed that the two un-powered ventilators on their tram car always turned the same as each other, whether in or out. The physicist immediately came up with a brilliant, yet obvious, explanation for the inevitability of same-turning fans. Whereupon he was told that the case had been described wrong, as the fans actually always turned opposite each other. The phyicist chuckled and said, “Oh, that is explained even more simply and obviously.” (Not really relevant, it just reminded me of.))
How does the Food Babe feel about iodised salt?
Inflammation is the “quantum” of physiology. Weirdly, the same people who fear inflammation also really want a boosted immune system… it’s like they don’t know how the immune system works, or something.
I drink my vodka with Coke and vanilla, no lemons in sight.
I have also never been mauled by bears.
I drink my rum with a bit of water. No bears. (maybe it’s the water)
All of my bear-encounters have been without alcohol.
On my part. Dunno about Yogi and Booboo.
Guinness.
No bears, unless we’re talking about the gay type.
She’s parroting the same sort of nonsense promoted by the cancer quack, Robert O. Young:
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2007/06/08/your-friday-dose-of-woo-acid-base-or-woo-2/
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2008/09/18/viruses-are-molecular-acids/
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2009/01/30/sepsis-is-not-caused-by-infection/
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2014/07/11/a-scottish-doctor-endorses-robert-o-youngs-ph-miracle-living/
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2011/05/17/all-bacteria-are-bad/
I suppose, since they’re defining alkaline as pH >7.0, anything that increases your pH from 7.35 to say 7.350001 would count as making your body tissues “more alkaline”, and would probably be safe, too.
This sounds a lot like a garbled butchering of the mechanism for post-hypercapnea compensatory metabolic alkalosis following respiratory acidosis.
I drink a variety of alcoholic beverages and I’ve never been attacked by a bear, so I guess with drinking different things I protect myself against different bears, like polar bears and grizzlies and pandas.
Don’t give me any of that fucking “there are no bears where you life crap”. There are two bears living in walking distance at my flat. Do you know why they have to be kept behind bars in the zoo?
Because too many people visit the zoo while completely sober.
+++
That’s actually a public health policy that kicks some people under the bus for the benefit of many. Iodine is very bad for you if you have Hashimoto’s disease like I do. Getting salt without added iodine is by now difficult, but I manage. Things get a bit complicated when I have to eat out a lot.
Maybe that will change if we can come up with a functional equivalent of the theme park “You must be this tall”-sign. You must be this tipsy to enter. But how to measure this in a consistent way that works with throngs of zoo visitors is beyond me.
But given the consistent reporting of alcohol consumption and a lack of bear attacks, this simply must be an adaptive trait. Back in the savannah days bear attacks must have been common until our ancestors got smashed. Okay, poor choice of words, but bear with me. Sorry. Anyhow, there would clearly be an evolutionary advantage to those individuals with a propensity to consume large amounts of alchol, particularly to those with robust livers and the abilitiy to remain at least vaguely functional while drunk.
I shall have this written up and published in the flagship EvoPsych journal post haste.
Homeopathetic knowledge.
Prepositions.
Obviously more complicated than quantum mechanics……
Cayenne pepper? Cayenne pepper? Doesn’t she know it contains 8-methyl-N-vanillyl-6-nonenamide — a chemical?
Also, the bear repellent theory explains neatly why we moved out of Africa. You know, after climate changed and the great Savanna Bear died out, humans went looking for new bears they could avoid getting mauled by.
There are bears everywhere, even Australia if you don’t let that silly marsupial nonsense distract you. How were our poor ancestors supposed to know that koala bears aren’t actually bears. All they knew was that they needed bears so they could not get attacked while being drunk.
If you’re still not convinced, look at the next piece of evidence: teddy bears: When the world became more industrialized and many people lived far away from nature without the ability to scare off real wild bears and not nearly enough zoos around*, people invented a teddy bear.
Where do you go to when you are drunk? Right, you go to bed. Where do you keep a teddy bear? In bed. What other reason would there be to take a fucking wild and potentially dangerous animal and turn it into a toy if not the deep psychological need for not being attacked by a bear while being drunk?
*Remember all the cruel things people did to bears like dancing bears and bear pits. There is no other explenation.
That explains why koala “bears” infest my property, I don’t drink enough.
I’ve noticed that I’ve had far more colds in the last three years or so than I had previously. This is clearly linked to having a child born three and a bit years ago. To avoid having the same fate befall them, Vana Hari and her followers should definitely avoid breeding.
This is one of the few health-related advantages of aging. Infection with most cold-causing viruses produces immunity to that particular virus, and they don’t mutate as fast as influenza viruses, but there are a lot of them. As you get older, you are immune to more and hence vulnerable to fewer.
My wife is convinced zinc has both preventative and mitigating effects on colds. There is evidence for the latter at least, and a potential mechanism for both.
Since there’s many knowledgable folks here:
Serious question: Is there any link between soy bean consumption and headaches? Of course google says there is, but google says many things…
Giliell@55,
Sorry, but your beautiful theory has been killed by a nasty, ugly little fact (h/t Thomas Henry Huxley). Bears were exterminated in Britain centuries ago, but the British still get drunk; hence we must conclude that ethanol does not protect them from mauling by bears. Since a single exception is enough to refute a theory, I’m afraid yours has turned up its toes, kicked the bucket, handed in its dinner pail, and gone to join the choir invisible.
Giliell@55,
Sorry, I should have read to the end of your comment! The bit about teddy bears is obviously not at all an ad hoc addition to protect the theory from falsification!
erichoug@5:
I used to know someone who augmented his diet with high doses of cinnamon for its supposed health benefits.
“Used to”, because he died from liver failure last summer.
Any chance we can get a campaing started accusing the food babe of being a shill for Big Citrus?
Nick
A) The bears still lived there when the various groups arrived. You could also say that things have gone downhill ever since.
B) It refutes the theory in no way. No drunken Brits are getting mauled by bears. See, my husband was still vaccinated against smallpox which is now extinct. That doesn’t mean he isn’t still protected by the vaccination against a theoretical encounter with smallpox.
Also, we could correlate whether the people who killed the poor bears were sober or drunk. I bet most bears were killed by pretty sober people.
Sorry, but “Big Citrus” would never fly. It sounds more like a religion than a blackhearted company bent on whatever fruit-conglomerates are bent on.
Presenting the Great Lemon in the Sky. Casual worshippers remember Her mostly during the summer. The Great Lemon is sometimes equated with the sun, which orthodox lemonists regard as a (fairly mild) form of heresy. Fortunately lemonism is a peaceful and forgiving religion, although extremists have been known to hurl oranges when provoked.
Devout worshippers insist on adding lemon to almost anything they consume, ranging from a few drops of lemon juice with a meal to lemon slices with drinks and, in one extreme case, a hut constructed entirely from lemon peels. The hut, of course, was not consumed but rather collapsed. The occupant was rescued after 46 hours of digging and, according to his wiki entry, still smells like lemons 37 years after the fact.
Religious imagery surrounding the Great Lemon is, as is often the case, borrowed from other mainstream religious.* You may, for example, already be familiar with the Lemon Tree of Life.
Likewise ceremonial proceedings have similar origins to that of other organised cults. The Vatican may prefer purple but the high priests of the Lemon prefer yellow for obvious reasons. During a service lemons are squeezed in the Holy Press and the juice is blessed and shared among the worshippers.
May the Big Citrus bless and keep you.
*Counting all branches and sects, Lemonism is estimated to have close to a billion followers, mostly grouping in more affluent regions with warm climates.
So, to tie citrus, and ethanol-bear-repellant together, results in Limoncello! Those Italians are so intensely clever to invent such a liquid. Italy, the source of all such religiosities [@66: “Counting all branches and sects, Lemonism is estimated to have close to a billion followers, mostly grouping in more affluent regions with warm climates.”] and ethanol infused liquids (Chianti), Rome, the prime example thereof.
I think the Food babe might also date a French model she met on the internet.
Whenever I run into someone talking this kind of “every morning I drink a squeezed glass of fungo juice” crap I remind them that Stevie Ray Vaughn used to start his day off with a tumbler of bourbon to chase down a huge snoot of cocaine. And it worked for him; he felt great and it wasn’t the booze and drugs that killed him. Therefore.
Re: bears. I am mostly a tea-drinker and last spring a bear shredded the seat-covers out of my jeep (apparently bears suffer boredom, or my jeep’s seats were full of peanut butter) I hadn’t realized it was science so I may switch to boubon and cocaine instead of tea. Unlike cinammon and lemon, boubon and cocaine actually does have a metabolic effect. It causes 80’s music and freudian psychology.
But… I’ve never been drunk or really consumed any alcohol* and I’ve never been attacked by a bear.
I drink club soda straight from the can, though, which I was informed this weekend is disgusting and not something a normal person would do. Maybe that’s raising my PH balance in my body and thus throwing the bears off?
* – I’ve had couple of sips of champagne at weddings during toasts, that’s about it.
Addendum: bourbon and cocaine also is implicated in the formation of the worst president in US history, so … forget it. I’ll stick to teatotalling and let the bears have the run of the place.
This is the same woman, some of you may recall, whose webpage posted a rant against airlines for being cheapasses by not ensuring the cabin atmosphere was 100% oxygen.
I drink club soda straight from the can, though, which I was informed this weekend is disgusting and not something a normal person would do.
Normal people carry champagne flutes and pour their club soda into those and drink it from them. Make sure you hold the champagne flute properly (the opening should be vertical facing up)
Yipes. This is the same woman “Time” has listed as one of the 30 most influential people on the internet, right?
http://www.themarysue.com/time-influential-internet-list/.
Well, if she’s taking fresh lemon juice every day she’s probably getting a good diet high in fruits and vegetables, which … well, it’s not a silver bullet at all, but my own anecdata is that when you’re eating a good diet you feel better, generally.
…
This year I’ve been exercising and eating right, and I have also gotten fewer colds!!
I’ve also been able to limit my exposure to sick people this year more than other years–but I’m sure that has nothing to do with this!!
Marcus Ranum
So if I carry the flute facing downward the bears will get me?
drst
Herd protection!
That’s why Mormonism thrives best in Utah, with few bears around.
Truely frightening, once you’re set on your conclusion, magically ALL the data falls into place.
But Keith Richards is still going strong, so I’m going to consider the cocaine-n-bourbon diet.
The Food Babe is appealing to the contrarian idea that anyone can become an expert because the ‘experts’ are all wrong. Just use your common sense and trust only in people who share your passions and goals. You want a more natural, peaceful, spiritual life — one which rejects giant corporations and attempts to cramp your individuality? Then the Food Babe is for you. You both vibrate on the same frequency
I’ve had people tell me that chemistry is still a matter of opinion. Figuring things out from personal experience is still the gold standard of knowledge… which now means that disagreement is a personal attack on them.
I personally would like to see chlorine removed from our water. Then it would be undrinkable and we would be forced to drink beer all day like in the dark ages.
@63 LykeX
How about Big Banana?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Fruit_Company
Some of the stuff that’s been written by Hari (the “Food Babe”) is just unbelievable, like her claims about flying (to save money, the airline “pumps in” air that’s not pure oxygen, and that air contains Nitrogen, which makes it harmful) that just display an appalling ignorance about some of the most basic facts of science. I started following a couple parody groups on Facebook such as the “Chow Babe” and the “Food Hunk” that do a great job highlighting some of the more absurd things Hari has said, and eviscerating them. Still, even reading take-downs of this stuff makes me want to beat my head against a wall, because it reminds me that there are tons of folks who happily accept everything Hari says as gospel truth.
Giliell – I’m pretty sure there are bears in Utah? More than in Ohio, where I lived for 6 years while successfully never being attacked by a bear. Of course I lived in California, West Virginia, New York, Massachusetts and Maryland too…
I’m confused. Science is hard.
Sometimes when I drink I’m attacked by a bare. Of course, she usually drinks along with me.
I’d just like to point out that bears are more active in the summer months, when people are more likely to be drinking gin and tonics, along with Coronas. So yes, alcohol protects you against bear attacks, but limes clearly attract bears. This is why you should never eat ceviche without booze.
Re: 81
How about http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Pineapple
It’s a miracle!
*resists temptation to link to Life of Brian*
Doesn’t count. Keith Richards is clearly a zombie.
didn’t he have a complete blood supply swap to “detox” himself? Gotta be a little bit more difficult than a complete oil change every 3,000 miles, to putt around in that fun little jalopy. But what’s fun is worth lots.
While I don’t drink very often, still, I’ve never been mauled by a pope.
This thread is a treasure-trove for managing bear attacks!
Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk- @ 50, advances us sharply when she points out there are different kinds of bears! It could resolve the vexing question of what kind of alcohol (although, I’m sorry, vodka martinis with fresh lemon peel have a clear cut advantage. Because I just said they did.)
I believe she further advances us @55, with the instinct level need for bears to be around so we are not attacked while drunk. Like all insight at genius level, it seems obvious in hindsight. My own parents gave me a toy bunny, which would explain why I furiously threw it out of the crib at every opportunity, even though I was sober at the time! It is all fitting together now.
drst @ 70 raises a serious point, but I have to ask, could it be that drst was not attacked because of a special dispensation from the Big Citrus in the Sky? Are two forces at work there? I don’t think club soda would cut it, on its own, in terms of non-attack-ousity.
drst @74
If true, a further indictment of the internet.
Mothra @90
Now, you’re just being silly. The pope’s Swiss Guards are the ones that do the mauling. *Eye roll*
Strewth @72:
Really? 100% oxygen?
Okay, I’m back from looking it up. It is true:
“The air that is pumped in isn’t pure oxygen either, it’s mixed with nitrogen, sometimes almost at 50%. ”
Wow, that ‘s some spicy stupid she has there.
Lemon juice alkaline, that must be the ‘new chemistry’.
Fluoride: I would think that after bathing her teeth daily in citric acid she might need a little fluoride if she intends to keep them.
The food babe: bringing the stupid by the truckload.
Nick Gotts #60
As a Brit, I can answer this one. I think you’ll find that we were so damn successful at drinking the bears away that they all died out, but by that point we had created such a varied plethora of different
bear repellantsalcohols (seriously, the sheer variety of bitters and ales alone is mind boggling, and then you have cider, whiskey, gin…) that it just seemed a shame to waste it all.Besides, you have to keep drinking; it’s the sheer amount of alcohol in Britain that stops them coming back.
@Giliell #55
I think you’ll find teddy bears were originally invented as a prop used to train children, so that we could ensure they responded properly in the event of a bear attack. The parents would randomly jump out, growling and holding the teddy, and the children would be expected to immediately pull out their hipflasks and a deck of cards and begin a game of Ring of Fire.
Gillel @ 65: I believe you are correct because… In my current state of New Jersey there are a lot of bears. Some would say we have a bear problem or others might say that the bears have a people problem (I am always confused whose problem it is.) If you favor bears (as I do) yet we are not getting killed by them very often then, perhaps, we are drinking enough.
Bears also like garbage. They may also like gardens. New Jersey has lots of both.
So there you have it… lots of booze and lots of garbage results in a population explosion of bears.
@Thumper 93,
So how do you explain Paddington Bear?
#11:
That is SIMPLY BRILLIANT! Please allow me to quote you everywhere on this.
@What A Maroon #95
The Brown family were notorious tee-totallers.
The Foodbabble… Nice :) But sad…
You need more neighbourhood defence cats!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/5067912.stm
GAWKER chimes in:
The “Food Babe” Blogger Is Full of Shit
So it ain’t just a disgruntled BIOLOGIST (and his army of sockpuppet minions) who objects to the chemalerts from Foodbabe about how food with any chemicals is TOXIN.
[ But I’m just pilin’ on, belatedly. ]
Me, too feared, to read the FoodBabe blog: is she a ChemTrail conspirator? My bet is “Yeah, naturally {smirk}”, based on her un-rational fears of ‘chemicals’, (with a big C).
I really suspect that she just be playing off common apprehensions held by people who are simply unawares of the benefits, and who may generalize one term to cover all the things they don’t understand ( !yet! ). When given evidence, they will accept it; and not remain ‘irrational deniers’, like these “big bloggers” portray (by spluging the profitable clickbait all over the intertubez).
/invective