Some people have demanded that we provide a direct line to the Executive Committee, the Complaints Department, and Customer Service for Freethoughtblogs, so that if you really want to yell at the Director and all those people who control the content on this blog network, you can do so. We hear and obey. There is a new email address that you can use to get access: FtBCustomerService. Send your concerns there, and the people in charge will deal with it appropriately.
The Executive Committee is very busy, and the Director is both secretive and occupied with making sure each blog meets specific standards, so please only use this email address if your concerns are very important.
Oh god, it might be spammed into uselessness by pitters within the week….
Finally, a place where I can complain about the lack of iambic pentameter around here!
“listen to MEEEEEEEEEE” will be the main complaint.
There are no filters on the FtBCustomerService address, so anyone can exercise their free speech and make their opinions known.
What if Micheal Nugent starts using it?
Little (desert) birdie tells me someone has nice things to say about Dana Hunter :3
Anyone is free to use it. In fact, we encourage those with complaints to use it — how else will we know to police everyone’s blogs?
I am sure you have your best people standing by…
http://youtu.be/FHO9uCQBiwI
Which do you think will make up the largest percentage of e-mails? Generic advertisement spam, calls for PZ to be kicked out for being a lying rad-fem poopy head, or cries about suppression of free speech from individuals too oblivious to realize that they are, at the very moment of sending the e-mail, exercising said feezedom of peach?
All of my complaints will, of course, be written in Comic Sans.
Janine the Jackbooted Emotion Queen @5
But isn’t that Nugent is all about, making complaints about PZ and FTB?
No, it’s about not being taken seriously and ignored by PZ and FTB. And this could be another way his complaints are laughed at. And being laughed at, is not on MN’s agenda.
So far, all of the emails to the Complaints Dept. are…compliments. It’s kind of weird.
I look forward to reading about the more hilarious examples.
So they’re being read, not forwarded to /dev/null?
This is serious business! Of course they’re read!
I for one, have made my complaint. A “coffee latte” is a real drink, and when I order one, I expect FTB to serve me what I have ordered!
I will repeat my complaint, as it has not been dealt with by the FTB Overlords. “Coffee Latte” is a real drink that I expect FTB Bloggers to provide me with. I will write another letter to complain.
Not necessarily a complaint, so I won’t send it to the address, but a question:
Why has “A Veil And A Dark Place” disappeared from the list of blogs on the left of the screen?
And going to https://proxy.freethought.online/veil/ , I see Hiba’s banner at the top of the page, but then just a single line: “Sorry, no content matched your criteria.”
michaelbusch #19
Good question.
I wish to complain about the FtBCostumerService. The so-called ‘Superman cape’ arrived, and turned out to be an old bedsheet, inexpertly dyed.
Yeah.
This thread could be fun.
Where’s my cyberpistol?
Why have my concerns not been responded to adequately? I have been unfailingly polite. Very well, we shall resume in an hour.
I didn’t receive my.monthly Feminist Agenda Newsletter. Again.
Thank you for finally providing an email for such complaints. Until now all I could do was vent my frustration on unsuspecting men by not laughing at their ‘my wife..’ jokes.
Great. I have a serious complaint that I feel must be addressed forthwith.
The serious problem I speak of is that the web site is called freethoughtblogs, but this makes sense only when looking at more than one blog, such as on the home page. Otherwise, it is a damned lie promoted by this network. If there were any standards of honesty here, the URL would change to freethoughtblog.com/<blog> when you were viewing content on a particular blog.
Please fix this immediately and restore integrity to this web site.
yazicus
Gheesh, it’s called a latte macchiato and it used to be a kiddie drink (seriously).
Either you speak real furrein or none at all.
Complaint dismissed (there are probably stamps for that. If not you could get rich seilling them)
Well, I got a few things off my mind.
Harumph.
I have a very serious complaint for FTB.
I have acquired for Ed Brayton, as requested, the heart of God. Well, the heart of a god. Well, the heart of a godly person. Well, a heart. But Ed was very unclear how I was supposed to send it to him. I tried email, but its very damp and sticky, and it doesn’t fit into any of the ports on my laptop. Now I just have heart bits jammed in everywhere. I demand that someone from FTB come collect this heart and give me a new computer.
PS: Please hurry, its starting to smell a little funny.
PZ@4 “make their opinions known”. Use of the word “known” here kind of implies that a sapient being will actually be reading the emails, which I have to admit surprises me. :p
@Giliell #26
Caffellatte is what Italians typically have for breakfast. It is made with coffee brewed in a moka, mixed with warm milk. Latte macchiato is a mix of cream and warm milk usually served in a glass with a drop of espresso. They are not the same.
When last we corresponded you claimed that my concerns would be given all due consideration. All due consideration? All DUE consideration!?!1!1?!
I will accept nothing less than all *dude* consideration. I await your compliance in this matter.
I wish to complain about the fact that you have set up a complaints department.
I only follow the blogs of people who appear to be adults and who are likely to write stuff in which I have some interest, including stuff I didn’t know I was interested in until now.
If I have a disagreement with someone I file that mentally under one of three headings – difference of opinion, the rough and tumble of boisterous argument and “this person is an ideologue / obsessive and a waste of my time.” If I consider that I may have been at fault in some way I apologise and back off.
Should I have a serious difference which does not fit easily into the above classifications then I will take the matter up privately with the individual blogger. it’s never happened yet.
Thus I refuse to use your complaints service.
procrastinatorordinaire
You know, the fact that I know that latte macchiato is a kiddies drink should have given you a hint.
But it’s caffè, with an A.
And if you want to argue varieties I’ll treat you to the nomenclatura of el café malagueño
You can also complain to Ed Brayton
FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) #31:
So you want a compliant complaints dept?
I am displeased by the lack of response from the complaints department. I demand you form a new department that I can complain to about the failures of the complaints department.
This is the internet! All complaints are serious, no exceptions.
A completely compliant complaint crew is crucial to the continuation of the cause…of course.
I’ll get my coat….
Seconding post #19. I always read “A veil and a dark place”, it was very well written, informative and often rage-inducing. When the content disappeared my big question was “Is Hiba OK?”.
So…. where’s my pony?
Thank goodness someone has finally addressed the greatest injustice of our time: how does someone complain to your lord and master when you express an accurate but unflattering opinion of their behavior? Up until now their free speech was completely and 100% unfairly restricted….
… to Twitter, Facebook, and at this point like 150000 words in dozens of blog posts. In other words, until now they’ve been entirely silenced. But now FINALLY justice can be done thanks to a dedicated email address!
Hiba is okay. She determined that she’s more okay when she’s not blogging. I miss her blog, but I appreciate her taking care of herself.
Oh, Professor Myers, FtB has done it now! You have unleashed a whole BUCKET o’ FUN on this unruly bunch! I can hear it now… “You kids stop messin’ around! This is serious business! Don’t make me come back there!” /while driving car/
You owe me a yacht and a jet.
“I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.”
*What, none of your minds went that way?
If you need to forward some to Abuse*, I’ll volunteer to fill that position!
*See the classic “Argument Clinic” sketch.
Cuttlefish @ #2:
When Cuttlefish complain about the rhythm,
No commenters appear agreeing with ’em.
But tentacles that wield the quill may falter
If attitudes to iams do not alter.
“Clearly the syllables should be in pairs!
Why can’t they see it!” Cuttlefish despairs.
Yet still the comments carry on regardless,
Filling the Cuttle’s branchial hearts with hardness.
I find myself wondering where this demand came from, and all I can think of is this . . .
I wish to complain about all the complaining in this thread. Why do you people always think other people are interested in your opinions? You come on here, fire up your keyboard, and rattle off opinions no one else gives a damn about, and another thi-
*is crushed by 16-ton ball of solid irony*
I’d like to complain that nobody has come by to shovel my sidewalk.
If I wrote in iambic penta
meter, my lines would be short.
If I wrote in pentamic, I am
metering my words to distort.
If I was polysyllabic,
I shred the fine fabric,
of meaning I want to export.
[wax]
I’m not interested in this conversation and I think it’s a shame you have fallen so low. I’ve been reading Pharyngula for a long time and I miss the times when you wrote about biology instead of pandering to your capitalist overlords with this Complaints Department bullshit.
I think this is my last comment on your blog.
Goodbye.
I’d like to complain that the auto-suggest just suggested that I should type
Beat Rice
instead of
Beatrice.
Insults! Threats of violence!
What do you have to say, PZ Meyers?
How dare you exclude us, Beat Rice? Or should I say Beat Race? Him?
It’s PeeZed!*
Unfairness to Canadians and Britons, and probably some other people too!
* For reals, it’s not, and Prof Meyers (sic) doesn’t like it.
Er, “him” should have been “hm” up there, sorry. I haven’t finished training my autocorrect yet.
I have a complaint: I’ve been out since I was 20 and I still haven’t received a damned toaster oven.
::Shakes hand at Meyer’s::
‘Ello, I wish to register a complaint. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.
What? I thought you wanted Abuse. Complaints is down the hall, on the left. Across from arguments.
So that’s where I demand my refund.
Damn. Sorry. I missed Anne up at #44.
That’s what I get for skimming the comments rather than actually, y’know, reading them. Call that job satisfaction?
Ogvorbis,
You should complain
My feet hurt.
Do you suppose they will also have a lost-and-found? I appear to have lost my optimism sometime in the past three years or so . . .
Advice, please.
Which email address should I use to complain about my email software not working?
Beatrice @62:
nah. No point. I ain’t worth it.
I wish to complain… that I can’t remember what I wanted to complain about.
Ogvorbis, great minds think alike. Or in the same gutter. Something like that.
So now that this is settled, where do we complain about people who insist there must be a way for them to complain about people they want to complain about?
Coast Guard?
The Pullet Patrol™ found it, and is storing it in a used grog keg until you are ready to get it back.
No, no, no,Ogvorbis, always lodge a complaint. Maybe one day someone makes a clerical error and you get a pony!
Nerd @69:
Probably gonna be a long wait. Just pickle it for posterity.
I want to lodge a complain about people who misuse Poe(‘s law)
Beatrice @70:
Oh. Good. A pony. One that can kick, bite, stand on my foot, and lean on me pinning me against an electric or barbed wire fence. Oh, joy and happiness unforseen!
Anne@44 & Ogvorbis@58, Ah yes, the Norwegian blue, what’s wrong with it?
I had one of those once, His name was Fozzy Bear. He was evil. No ponies, please.
Which reminds me. I would like to lodge a formal complaint about the quality of my childhood pony. My expectations were not met. Please inform the executive committee that henceforth all ponies will need to meet a minimum threshold of Pleasant before delivery.
@Stephanie Zvan @41:
Thanks for the information, and best wishes to Hiba.
yazikus @76:
I wonder if I could lodge a formal complaint about my childhood? Not all of it. Just three or so years.
@74:
He’s pining for the fiords.
@15:
They’re being read, then sent to /dev/null
My voice hurts and I want a puppy.
@78 Ogvorbis
Me too. I have about four years or so that I would like to lodge a formal complaint about. Can we get a refund ? Better childhood, with or without pony will do.
Franny Maccy @82:
Already getting that. Multiple emails every day. Spam catches most of them. Some, like you, leak through.
In Soviet Union, Complaints Department emails YOU.
Going with the theme that Anne@44 & Ogvorbis@58, have started, I would like to complain about this box of chocolates, especially about Crunchy Frog and Spring Surprise. The lark’s vomit is not too bad.
Look.
Comments are still open, here.