Well, obviously he does.
He never grew up with proper fear of hell, so he turned into a violent, selfish, murderous prick.
cagsays
Actually, the apologists have the excuses, and lots of them. Their imaginary god is too lazy to exercise its omniignorance. In fact their god has always been a no-show.
michaelraymersays
I guess Australia doesn’t have that problem where such signs are deemed “too controversial” to be displayed?
blindrobinsays
Now that sign works.
Gregory Greenwoodsays
Que some feeble theist apologetics that amount to no more than vague blathering about ‘free will’, ‘original sin’, and the ‘fallen’ nature of humanity.
The god-botherers always have to tie themselves in unconvincing semantic knots when the problem of evil comes up because – if their monstrous, imaginary deity actually existed – it would be the single greatest force for evil and suffering that humanity has ever encountered.
It would be the ultimate author of, and party responsible for, every natural disaster, every war, every genocide, every pogrom, every murder, every oppressive law, every act of cruelty and every manifestation of humanity’s capacity for egotistical sadism both large and small. There is simply no logically consistent way for a supposedly omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent entity to dodge responsibility for any of it, so the fundies retreat from logic, reason, evidence and reality, as they always do when it fractures their comfortable little bubble of false moral superiority and unearned privilege, even deeper into their nasty little psychopath’s fairytale called religion, where the evils of the world aren’t really all that bad, and they are all the fault of teh debil/teh ghey/’uppity’ women/godless baby eaters anyway, so their god is off the hook, and is only really guilty of a littel voyeurism. Which seems to be in vogue in heaven, given that one of the principle forms of entertainment of the ‘saved’ is apparently going to be witnessing the suffering, torture and degradation of the ‘damned’ from the very best seats for all eternity. Yup, ‘religion of love’ right there…
Frankly, if their god existed, it would be the moral responsibility of every ethical person to work together to attempt deicide.
For some reason this reminds of this really stupid bumper sticker I saw the other day, it said “God Doesn’t Believe in Atheists”
Which goes to show you how stupid these people are. Their own imagination (god) doesn’t believe in real, living people. OK maybe they are right, something that doesn’t exist can’t believe in anything. Or are they trying to say that no one is really an atheist? Anyway you slice it, the stupid, it burns.
I think the form, If God ______, I hope he has a good excuse, is ripe for silly exploitation. (Farts; rear-ends my car; is hanging around right outside my window.)
seditiosussays
Now that’s how you do an atheist billboard.
Larssays
Non-existence is God’s only excuse.
This.
evadersays
Evader approves this billboard.
chrisgrintersays
That’s a great design!
4004bcsays
Mysterious ways and (un)intelligent design…
Now stop trying to think and go back to worshiping before you all burn in hell cause, he loves you so much.
Why did teh god create evil? If teh devil did it, why did teh god create teh devil?
Or alternatively, a question I wondered as a theist years ago: If free will leads to evil, and evil is against god’s will, why did god create free will?
'Tis Himself, OMsays
I like that one.
Over at the old site, on The Creation “Museum” thread, a godbotherer was warning us about being judged by The Big Guy In The Sky™. I responded:
If this does happen and your god punishes me for not believing in it, then I’ll spit in its face. I’ll then demand it explain itself to me, since according to the propaganda in your Bible, it’s a sadistic, narcissistic bully with the emotional maturity of a spoiled six year old.
wdimacsays
“I step out for a few millenia and all hell breaks loose!” – god
Usernames are stupidsays
@chrisgrinter (#14) – I respectfully disagree. The left side is marginally okay. The right side is crap: an unreadable word goulash (this is on a vehicle that will be moving, so BIG, SHORT, TO THE POINT). White on black is not very eye-catching, especially on a bus with a big blob of black (the window frames) next to it.
Someone needs to pay someone to do what she or he does better than those people.
Once again, the lack of serious, qualified design experts really hurts. Graphic design is a discipline with skills and conventions and widely accepted principles: it actually takes a lot of training and talent to do it well. This ad…doesn’t. Not only is it ugly, but sarcasm is really, really hard to communicate well on a billboard. You’re best off avoiding it. — PZ
Amen! Damn straight!
M Groesbecksays
I still don’t quite get how the subset of religion that insists on an omnipotent and omnibenevolent magical friend ended up becoming so powerful and influential. Yes, all religions have the problem that they deal with imaginary entities, but at least most of them have explanations for why bad things happen — their gods are lazy, or petty, or vindictive, or just generally assholes. It certainly conflicts with the observed data less blatantly than the “omnipotent and omnibenevolent” schtick.
verbascumsays
God is the biggest bastard in the universe.
mikeesays
Excellent advertisement.
@usernamesarestupid #19 I respectfully disagree with you. City buses stop quite regularly which should give people time to read the smaller print. However, even without reading this, the larger message works all by itself.
george3says
“If there is any kind of supreme being, it is up to us to become his moral superior.” Lord Havelock Vetinari.
shaundenneysays
Now that’s a good one.
Also @ Anuran, Greg Greenwood, 4004bc – it does specify a good excuse, ruling out the usual rubbish.
concernedjoesays
Which brings me to something that bugs the shit out of me – officially sanctioned vacuous professions (statements)!
Let’s see what comes to mind:
the ubiquitous, thrust upon us all, “In God We Trust”,
the ever popular and obligatory (at least for politicians) “I am a person of faith [implied or direct “in god”]”,
the social statement worth a free atta-boy when your lack of commitment to a majority religion shows “I am a spiritual person” or “I am in a good place spiritually” or “I believe in a higher power”.
Tell me – I mean tell me – what the fuck do these things mean in any practical way!?! Let’s take the top one:
“In God We Trust” – how so? Do you eschew out of hand or abandon all practical reliance on and trust in non-god methods and means? That is do you really show in your every day actions that you REALLY trust anything other than things of humans and the very secular laws of nature?
Oh I know the apologetic: god will send me manna when I am hungry (read “a skilled doctor” or “a job” or “the strength to endure” or “knowledge and wisdom” or etc.).
But what if “He” doesn’t? What if “god” leaves your child to suffer a horrible death under an overturned car hidden down an embankment while the rescue squad obliviously fries up their mid-night breakfast?
What if “He” makes your life seem so miserable that the only thing you can think of is ending it all?
What if “He” tells GWB to invade Iraq? Or counsels the Republicans in their fervent prayers to make sure most of us are never comfortable about being cared for when health fails, or having enough to live when capitalistic jobs evaporate, etc..
What if your Judge, your Lawyer, your Doctor, your Mechanic, your Electrician, etc. said: “I’ll JUST pray for your judgement/advice/a cure/a fix for your brakes/that your old wires withstand the extra load” added with “I never really studied – God tells me what I need to know”.
You say that’s absurd?!?!? No it is NOT! Again what does “In God We Trust” mean in any practical way?!?!? I know I know .. He guides us to wisdom.. but do you ever rely on, actually turn to – someone not asking for God or accepting God in any way? Do you ask all on whom you rely? Would you really eschew the World’s best oncologist (let’s say an atheist) over the Pope’s and his minions’ prayers?!?!?
These sayings mean nothing because your “god” is nothing! Be intellectually HONEST!
…a question I wondered as a theist years ago: If free will leads to evil, and evil is against god’s will, why did god create free will?
Me, too.
Loudsays
M Groesbeck #20
I still don’t quite get how the subset of religion that insists on an omnipotent and omnibenevolent magical friend ended up becoming so powerful and influential.
Bloodshed.
concernedjoesays
birgerjohansson -let’s ask Ratzi about it – he should know!
Sastrasays
concernedjoe #25 wrote:
Oh I know the apologetic: god will send me manna when I am hungry (read “a skilled doctor” or “a job” or “the strength to endure” or “knowledge and wisdom” or etc.).
But what if “He” doesn’t?
Then they will spin and twist and scrounge and scrape desperately for some faint, small kernel of goodness to be found in the situation and elevate this into a noble, redeeming evidence of God’s infinite Love.
I was at a book discussion on Cormac McCarthy’s The Road — a depressing tale of a father and son trying to find food and escape being eaten by cannibals in a post-apocalyptic earth with no light, no hope, no food, no civilization, no plants, and virtually no people left before the ineluctable death of every living thing on planet earth — and a Catholic friend found the story faith-affirming. Yes, all is lost, eventually — but God was still to be found in the affection between father and son and the fact that they always seemed to find food just before they starved to death. Plus, they always escaped the cannibals. God is at work — and good is stronger than evil! There MUST be a principle of Good working through all things. Miracle, miracle, miracle.
He was not pleased when it was pointed out that the same story could have been told from the cannibal’s point of view and there’d be the same incredible last-minute against-the-odds survival tale. Always another miserable victim to be eaten, just when it seemed like they were safe. Why not say that there MUST be a principle of Evil working through all things?
I mean, come on. If you can look at the situation in The Road and see your faith in God’s existence and love confirmed — then there is literally NOTHING that would change your mind. God isn’t infallible: you are.
— but God was still to be found in the affection between father and son and the fact that they always seemed to find food just before they starved to death. Plus, they always escaped the cannibals. God is at work — and good is stronger than evil! There MUST be a principle of Good working through all things. Miracle, miracle, miracle.,
Where was this god DURING the apocalypse?
Sastrasays
Ing #32 wrote:
Where was this god DURING the apocalypse?
The reason why the earth is in the shape it is in, is never actually explained. There was some cataclysmic event which wipes out many people followed by maybe 50 years where the sun is obscured and nothing can grow — which takes care of most of the others. Asteroid? Nuclear wars? Doesn’t say.
So where was God? Crying and bewailing the fact that all this pain, suffering, and destruction was necessary for the greater good — the uplifting love between father and son even in the worst of circumstances. It wouldn’t mean as much if things weren’t so bad, you see. It’s the Big Picture.
I think the religious have to be able to narrow their focus to a very, very tight little circle in order to see their Big Picture.
Chris Boothsays
Nice.
mikeschmitzsays
Unfortunately, the Gods cannot be blamed for not coming to you aid. It’s not because they weren’t listening. It’s because they don’t exist. The Gods we’ve been praying to for thousands of years do not exist. They can’t help you, because they are not real. We have been pandering to our own ignorance for far too long. – Gaius Baltar
cry4turtlessays
My brother used to ask me, “What if you’re wrong? What if when you die there is a god? What will you do?”
My answer, “Kick him in the balls and dive into hell.”
Kylie Sturgesssays
There’ll be another Atheist’s Breakfast at the GAC, before / during the convention starts?
anuran says
Well, obviously he does.
He never grew up with proper fear of hell, so he turned into a violent, selfish, murderous prick.
cag says
Actually, the apologists have the excuses, and lots of them. Their imaginary god is too lazy to exercise its omniignorance. In fact their god has always been a no-show.
michaelraymer says
I guess Australia doesn’t have that problem where such signs are deemed “too controversial” to be displayed?
blindrobin says
Now that sign works.
Gregory Greenwood says
Que some feeble theist apologetics that amount to no more than vague blathering about ‘free will’, ‘original sin’, and the ‘fallen’ nature of humanity.
The god-botherers always have to tie themselves in unconvincing semantic knots when the problem of evil comes up because – if their monstrous, imaginary deity actually existed – it would be the single greatest force for evil and suffering that humanity has ever encountered.
It would be the ultimate author of, and party responsible for, every natural disaster, every war, every genocide, every pogrom, every murder, every oppressive law, every act of cruelty and every manifestation of humanity’s capacity for egotistical sadism both large and small. There is simply no logically consistent way for a supposedly omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent entity to dodge responsibility for any of it, so the fundies retreat from logic, reason, evidence and reality, as they always do when it fractures their comfortable little bubble of false moral superiority and unearned privilege, even deeper into their nasty little psychopath’s fairytale called religion, where the evils of the world aren’t really all that bad, and they are all the fault of teh debil/teh ghey/’uppity’ women/godless baby eaters anyway, so their god is off the hook, and is only really guilty of a littel voyeurism. Which seems to be in vogue in heaven, given that one of the principle forms of entertainment of the ‘saved’ is apparently going to be witnessing the suffering, torture and degradation of the ‘damned’ from the very best seats for all eternity. Yup, ‘religion of love’ right there…
Frankly, if their god existed, it would be the moral responsibility of every ethical person to work together to attempt deicide.
JJ831 says
For some reason this reminds of this really stupid bumper sticker I saw the other day, it said “God Doesn’t Believe in Atheists”
Which goes to show you how stupid these people are. Their own imagination (god) doesn’t believe in real, living people. OK maybe they are right, something that doesn’t exist can’t believe in anything. Or are they trying to say that no one is really an atheist? Anyway you slice it, the stupid, it burns.
bribase says
Now THAT is a proper slogan.
Glen Davidson says
Non-existence is God’s only excuse.
Glen Davidson
Utakata says
Just checking on something. Sorry.
F says
I think the form, If God ______, I hope he has a good excuse, is ripe for silly exploitation. (Farts; rear-ends my car; is hanging around right outside my window.)
seditiosus says
Now that’s how you do an atheist billboard.
Lars says
This.
evader says
Evader approves this billboard.
chrisgrinter says
That’s a great design!
4004bc says
Mysterious ways and (un)intelligent design…
Now stop trying to think and go back to worshiping before you all burn in hell cause, he loves you so much.
Zinc Avenger says
Why did teh god create evil? If teh devil did it, why did teh god create teh devil?
Or alternatively, a question I wondered as a theist years ago: If free will leads to evil, and evil is against god’s will, why did god create free will?
'Tis Himself, OM says
I like that one.
Over at the old site, on The Creation “Museum” thread, a godbotherer was warning us about being judged by The Big Guy In The Sky™. I responded:
wdimac says
“I step out for a few millenia and all hell breaks loose!” – god
Usernames are stupid says
@chrisgrinter (#14) – I respectfully disagree. The left side is marginally okay. The right side is crap: an unreadable word goulash (this is on a vehicle that will be moving, so BIG, SHORT, TO THE POINT). White on black is not very eye-catching, especially on a bus with a big blob of black (the window frames) next to it.
Someone needs to pay someone to do what she or he does better than those people.
Amen!Damn straight!M Groesbeck says
I still don’t quite get how the subset of religion that insists on an omnipotent and omnibenevolent magical friend ended up becoming so powerful and influential. Yes, all religions have the problem that they deal with imaginary entities, but at least most of them have explanations for why bad things happen — their gods are lazy, or petty, or vindictive, or just generally assholes. It certainly conflicts with the observed data less blatantly than the “omnipotent and omnibenevolent” schtick.
verbascum says
God is the biggest bastard in the universe.
mikee says
Excellent advertisement.
@usernamesarestupid #19 I respectfully disagree with you. City buses stop quite regularly which should give people time to read the smaller print. However, even without reading this, the larger message works all by itself.
george3 says
“If there is any kind of supreme being, it is up to us to become his moral superior.” Lord Havelock Vetinari.
shaundenney says
Now that’s a good one.
Also @ Anuran, Greg Greenwood, 4004bc – it does specify a good excuse, ruling out the usual rubbish.
concernedjoe says
Which brings me to something that bugs the shit out of me – officially sanctioned vacuous professions (statements)!
Let’s see what comes to mind:
the ubiquitous, thrust upon us all, “In God We Trust”,
the ever popular and obligatory (at least for politicians) “I am a person of faith [implied or direct “in god”]”,
the social statement worth a free atta-boy when your lack of commitment to a majority religion shows “I am a spiritual person” or “I am in a good place spiritually” or “I believe in a higher power”.
Tell me – I mean tell me – what the fuck do these things mean in any practical way!?! Let’s take the top one:
“In God We Trust” – how so? Do you eschew out of hand or abandon all practical reliance on and trust in non-god methods and means? That is do you really show in your every day actions that you REALLY trust anything other than things of humans and the very secular laws of nature?
Oh I know the apologetic: god will send me manna when I am hungry (read “a skilled doctor” or “a job” or “the strength to endure” or “knowledge and wisdom” or etc.).
But what if “He” doesn’t? What if “god” leaves your child to suffer a horrible death under an overturned car hidden down an embankment while the rescue squad obliviously fries up their mid-night breakfast?
What if “He” makes your life seem so miserable that the only thing you can think of is ending it all?
What if “He” tells GWB to invade Iraq? Or counsels the Republicans in their fervent prayers to make sure most of us are never comfortable about being cared for when health fails, or having enough to live when capitalistic jobs evaporate, etc..
What if your Judge, your Lawyer, your Doctor, your Mechanic, your Electrician, etc. said: “I’ll JUST pray for your judgement/advice/a cure/a fix for your brakes/that your old wires withstand the extra load” added with “I never really studied – God tells me what I need to know”.
You say that’s absurd?!?!? No it is NOT! Again what does “In God We Trust” mean in any practical way?!?!? I know I know .. He guides us to wisdom.. but do you ever rely on, actually turn to – someone not asking for God or accepting God in any way? Do you ask all on whom you rely? Would you really eschew the World’s best oncologist (let’s say an atheist) over the Pope’s and his minions’ prayers?!?!?
These sayings mean nothing because your “god” is nothing! Be intellectually HONEST!
I’ll end my rant here.
richardelguru says
Great.
Of course we know what god would say, courtesy of Douglas Adams.
“We apologise for the inconvenience.”
birgerjohansson says
“In God We Trust”
-Don’t forget “Gott Mit Uns”
Quodlibet says
Zinc Avenger @ #16:
Me, too.
Loud says
M Groesbeck #20
Bloodshed.
concernedjoe says
birgerjohansson -let’s ask Ratzi about it – he should know!
Sastra says
concernedjoe #25 wrote:
Then they will spin and twist and scrounge and scrape desperately for some faint, small kernel of goodness to be found in the situation and elevate this into a noble, redeeming evidence of God’s infinite Love.
I was at a book discussion on Cormac McCarthy’s The Road — a depressing tale of a father and son trying to find food and escape being eaten by cannibals in a post-apocalyptic earth with no light, no hope, no food, no civilization, no plants, and virtually no people left before the ineluctable death of every living thing on planet earth — and a Catholic friend found the story faith-affirming. Yes, all is lost, eventually — but God was still to be found in the affection between father and son and the fact that they always seemed to find food just before they starved to death. Plus, they always escaped the cannibals. God is at work — and good is stronger than evil! There MUST be a principle of Good working through all things. Miracle, miracle, miracle.
He was not pleased when it was pointed out that the same story could have been told from the cannibal’s point of view and there’d be the same incredible last-minute against-the-odds survival tale. Always another miserable victim to be eaten, just when it seemed like they were safe. Why not say that there MUST be a principle of Evil working through all things?
I mean, come on. If you can look at the situation in The Road and see your faith in God’s existence and love confirmed — then there is literally NOTHING that would change your mind. God isn’t infallible: you are.
Ing: I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream So I Comment Instead says
Where was this god DURING the apocalypse?
Sastra says
Ing #32 wrote:
The reason why the earth is in the shape it is in, is never actually explained. There was some cataclysmic event which wipes out many people followed by maybe 50 years where the sun is obscured and nothing can grow — which takes care of most of the others. Asteroid? Nuclear wars? Doesn’t say.
So where was God? Crying and bewailing the fact that all this pain, suffering, and destruction was necessary for the greater good — the uplifting love between father and son even in the worst of circumstances. It wouldn’t mean as much if things weren’t so bad, you see. It’s the Big Picture.
I think the religious have to be able to narrow their focus to a very, very tight little circle in order to see their Big Picture.
Chris Booth says
Nice.
mikeschmitz says
cry4turtles says
My brother used to ask me, “What if you’re wrong? What if when you die there is a god? What will you do?”
My answer, “Kick him in the balls and dive into hell.”
Kylie Sturgess says
There’ll be another Atheist’s Breakfast at the GAC, before / during the convention starts?