The Catholic church has instructions for you before you get down to business with your sweetie: you’re supposed to say a little prayer. This one.

Father, send your Holy Spirit into our hearts. Place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth and does not deceive, forgiveness that truly receives, loving physical union that welcomes.

Open our hearts to you, to each other and to the goodness of your will. Cover our poverty in the richness of your mercy and forgiveness. Clothe us in true dignity and take to yourself our shared aspirations, for your glory, forever and ever. Mary, our mother, intercede for us. Amen.

Ooooh. Gets me hot^*. Maybe Kristin Maguire can write a story with this little fillip in it.

Hey, wait a minute…what are a bunch of old pseudo-celibates doing recommending prayers before sex? Do they teach this one to the altar boys?

^*Actually, it doesn’t. I lied. I think it would be kind of a buzzkill.