One sure way to get your Important Message to me is to use the good old US Mail (although my email is much snappier now, thanks to previous suggestions), and sometimes I do get the strangest stuff. This time, it was a formal looking letter from an organization called “Campaign for the Children.” How can you possibly turn away a letter from someone who is for the children? You can’t, of course. Then once I started reading … well, this doesn’t seem to be a campaign for children after all.
The letter opens by explaining that it was prompted by my comments on homosexuality and Albert Mohler, and that the author agrees with me, because she’s been given a similar understanding. By who?
Our relationship with Delamer Duverus began many years before, but in March of 2001, He became a constant empathetic companion. Our mentor heard Delamer Duverus before us, and through him came an incredible understanding that he shared with us through his many writings, beginning with The Golden Reed. The book is available online for all to read. It is a book of science and understanding and it is the book that brought us to God and the first relationship we had with our Creator but lost because we decided to commit the original sin, to partake of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, which was simply to think that we knew best what to do on our own intellect and guidance. We cannot always, especially in our world where deception is the means to an end. We could not accept many things in the Bible, especially the Old Testament, but through Delamer Duverus we began to see the truth and the contradictions and to bring order out of chaos. It set us free.
I’m still wondering who this Delamer Duverus is, but the fact that the author chooses to capitalize the personal pronoun and refer to herself in the plural is ominous. We’re going to hear about the mysterious “mentor” next, though.
Our mentor was killed by some faction of the shadow government and died in 1986. Before he died he took us aside and had us look up the word “cholesterol” in the dictionary. He was a great one for using the dictionary. We read the definition and then that was it. We don’t remember the definition exactly, but it linked cholesterol to the production of testosterone. It was an old dictionary.
This sounds like a dramatic story. I’m picturing some old guy, pierced with a poisoned shuriken thrown by an evil ninja assassin commissioned by the United Nations, beckoning his student over and telling her to look up a word in the dictionary before dying with a moan, “Remember … cholesterol … aaaaargh.”
It goes on, but you’ve got the idea already. She explains that she’s convinced that homosexuality is caused by diet, and that she’s been wandering the country, exposing satanic covens.
Fundamentally, she and I really don’t agree on much.
Oh! Delamer Duverus! She does explain, in a way, who he is.
Who is Delamer Duverus? He is what we call Man, with a capital M. The religions refer to them as Angels or the Lord God or God’s messengers, but to us they are the omnipresent Leukocytes in the Body of the Living God. They are here helping our nation and world to heal, and they do that by giving us the truth so that we might follow their guidance. We certainly can’t prove to you who He is, except by sharing what we have done and letting you decide for yourself.
The letter is signed by Delamer Duverus.
If you really want to know more, you can find Ol’ Del’s book online, and he has a blog (but of course—even angels need to blog nowadays). It’s full of science, like Duverus’s theory of races:
12 Races
Positive Races:
Blond-haired Gray
Brunette-haired Gray
Red-haired GrayDormant Positive Races:
Ainu
Eskimo
Mordvinian (Khazar)Negative Races:
Oriental (Yellow)
Nigero (Blue)
Asian (Red)Dormant Negative Races:
Aborigine
Polynesian
Gypsy
Caucasians are the Gray race, by the way; I’m so happy to be a member of a Positive Race.
Uh, did I mention that I really don’t agree much with Duverus?
Hmm. So I’m gray, eh? (Like the aliens that spook the UFO wackos?) Feeling pretty dormant, though.
Nut cases like this one are fascinating. You’d think it was a put-on except that they invest so much of their lives in this nonsense. Sadly entertaining and, fortunately, too weird to have a significant negative impact on anyone outside a tiny deranged few. Unless, of course, it reaches trendy cult status. Stranger things have happened. Scientology, for instance. Ugh.
I thought Delamer Duverus was a (still embargoed) name of one of the Death-seekers working for Voldemort in Book VII!
I don’t get to say this much: Weird.
Well, you have only yourself to blame for drinking so much last night. ;)
I’m no expert, but this sounds like the ramblings of a schizophrenic. I’ve only had a few interactions with one, but it seems pretty similar to what I’ve seen.
Remember Delamer’s Dentrifice…
Gog forbid we are childish or insulting of Delamer and her/his/its beliefs.
That would be so delame.
That’s disturbing. Horror-movie-stalker-psychopath disturbing.
At least the squidulous PZ can blast them with ink.
The caucasians are the Gray aliens, who are not really aliens at all but the humans of the far future.
Er, sorry, ol’ Delamer possessed me to say it.
From the Open Letter to Dan Savage…
“Lesbianism is not a crime against God and the Children because women don’t carry the memory. That is carried by the men and given to the sperm which gives it to the ovum.”
Hmmm, interesting idea seeing that Delamer claims to be female.
Duverus appears to be a channeler getting his “wisdom” from many sources (hence the plural pronoun), many of whom live on planets in the Pliadies. He/she/it also has connections to some rather unsavory conspiracy groups, believers in chemtrails and such.
Caucasians are pink. If you are gray, you should consider seeing a doctor.
Does this guy get his own page in the DSM IV?
Ken
If you google the name, you get a lot of links that look like they link to fruitbat sites…. I ain’t going to any of them until I’m at home.
“Nigero”?
I’m also curious as to why blonde, brunette and redheaded Caucasians rate as separate races.
Homosexuality caused by diet? Wieners maybe?
There’s no reason to try to analyze this kind of crazy.
It just is.
If you check out Jenny’s profile… she has about 8 blogs each with one or two posts.
All the same in terms of their unhinged qualities.
Signs that you may be crazy:
You refer to yourself in the plural.
You write lots of rambling gibberish.
You have an invisible friend that tells you what to do.
Doesn’t one pretty much follow of three?
I was going to say your correspondent may have just had too much Inspiration Soup, but with the general intellectual level, reference to angels, and link with fruit bats, I’d say this is a clear intervention by The Stupidest Angel.
What, nothing about the Jews? What the Hell kind of racist paranoid conspiracy theorist has nothing to say about the Jews? I am disappointed in you, Delamer Duverus.
A cult, how promising.
PZ — About your email problem… what did you end up doing to solve it?
It’s gotta be a cult of one.
If you are gray, you should consider seeing a doctor.
or a mortician
Ah, deja vu! When I worked in publishing a quarter century ago, every year or so we’d receive some zany letter or poster or chart or something along the same lines. I never answered them (how does one answer such as this?) but they were always good for a laugh. But good for a laugh or not I always wondered what the authors were like in person. Were they completely loony? Did they look and act normal? Or did they seem to beg for a straight jacket? I never did find out. And, PZ, I hope you don’t have occasion to find out about Delamer either.
According to that blog it is soy in products that make people gay as posted by World “Nut” Daily.
I concur that this unfortunate woman needs serious medical care, and I hope she somehow receives it. But I must doff my nogginwear to this wonderful string of delusions: 100% choice-cut lunacy. When Kyle Reese spilled the beans to the cops while trying to protect Sarah Connor from the Terminator, his story couldn’t hold a candle to this one.
If I ever have a neurochemical breakdown, I hope my “unique beliefs” are half as interesting.
I read that too, but wasn’t as impressed by it. It was more or less straightforward man-on-man porn with little substance to the scenarios, clearly written in the bathhouse era of the 1970s.
Still, some people can make a religion out of anything, I suppose.
Joshua,
I strongly suspect that “Khazar” is a reference to us. There aren’t many of them around anymore (fewer than Ainu, I suspect) and Nazis use this term for Ashkenazi Jews. “Mordvinian” is a new one for me. This is a reference to a culture from the Volga river basin who speak a Finnic language.
You see, sexuality is determined by one key dietary ratio. If your hotdog/taco ratio becomes unbalanced, you’ll be trying to have sex with all kinds of crazy things, including members of your own gender.
I hear they cured Ted Haggard with a strict all taco diet.
Needless to say, Duverus is of a positive race. Funny how in every faith, there is only one chosen race to which the Truth is revealed, although that Truth is applicable to all humans.
Uh.. why are Aborigines dormant negative races? Aren’t all people indigenous to a land from the Aboriginal stock of that land? Like the Ainu to northern Japan, who also happen to be a dormant positive race? Isn’t that contradictory?
Hehe.
There’s no rhyme or reason there. Don’t like for any. You will not find it.
There are blue people? I’d like to meet a blue person. Do they have snorkels on the top of their heads? Do they consort in trios? Are they sadder than the average Joe?
Cults only seem strange because few people believe them, religions are just as weird.
I was brutal. Went into ~/library/mail and ripped out the bulkiest folders, tossed ’em into a tarball, and banished them to a cd backup, where I’ll probably never look at them again. Deleting 70K messages made a huge difference in performance.
Actually, crazy has it’s uses. The nuttiest tend to succinctly reveal the underlying craziness of their more stable and cunning brethren.
We could not accept many things in the Bible, especially the Old Testament, but through Delamer Duverus we began to see the truth and the contradictions and to bring order out of chaos. It set us free.
That reminds me of a statement in one of scientology’s intro textbooks. One of the cover blurbs by some eminently forgettable actor was how, after finding scientology, life for him became “point and click.” This is one of the wonders of religion: boil the complexity of the world to one simple framework. No need to think or struggle – be set free of doubt and intellectual work. A Theory of Everything for dummies (Maybe I should write the book and make a quick buck?)
I worked at a library where this woman would come in from time to time wearing felt crosses on her ears and forehead. She had this glazed look in her eyes and didn’t walk so much as glide across a room. She was always otherwise very professionally dressed and carried a large briefcase.
This woman believed she was the reincarnation of Jesus Christ and that Slash, the guitarist of Guns N’ Roses and Velvet Revolver, was both God and her husband. Charitably, when staff made her a library card, they put her name as “Smith, Jane (Jesus Christ)”.
Yeah, some caucasians are gray. Argyria isn’t fun…
http://www.together.net/~rjstan/argyria_photos_intro.html
Augh…beat me to the Argyria link.
Lab-quality craziness! I checked out http://www.crank.net and it doesn’t look like they’ve got this one yet, so I guess it’s time to send them another link.
Delamer Duverus – isn’t he a minor character in the Harry Potter books?
llewelly said: “Caucasians are pink. If you are gray, you should consider seeing a doctor.”
Actually caucasians are *orange*, as anyone with as long a history of coloring books as I have could tell you ;^) People just look plain weird if you color them pink.
Lynn
Sure there are. Look here – BBC Link
But does Delamer Duverus understand the power of Timecube?
Bryn, that is at best a slight bluish cast. The blue Platonic ideal form can be found here.
Ken Mareld: Page? Does the DSM have marvellous data compression I haven’t heard about?
Tiax: I’d be willing to bet that there’s an American somewhere who has had chopped hot dogs in a tacoshell. What happens to them, are they almost bi?
Andrew Evans: There are certainly some on Sesame Street … mind you this person doesn’t seem to have learned anything else from it, so …
I must admit, this Delamer Druvus Angel is a kick. How can someone come up with this stuff? Amazing imagination.
Wow. I don’t think I want to look to intently at the other idiot in the car next to me on the commute home.
FEMA to Flouride to Faggotry
Notice though, that only MALE homosexuality is the evil wrong. Luckily for Jenny (the writer) I suppose and male fantasies lesbos, dykes, etc’eras are okay by god.
Some guy she dated must have had a best man on the side, or maybe she is really a homo inside, constantly visualizing it and hating herself for it? Let’s hope she wins a Darwin Award and doesn’t breed.