Headline Muse, 9/25

Though the world thought the odds were remote
It’s a milestone that’s worthy of note
Though they can’t drive a car
So it’s kind of bizarre
Saudi women will now get to vote

Headline: Reforms will allow women to vote but not drive

Of course, this story is everywhere. In the comments of the NPR article, one comment began “[t]he right to vote is not a king’s to give.” Beautiful iambic pentameter; I was sorely tempted to bust out a sonnet. But it is also one of my favorite debate topics, on which I have gone many rounds on many occasions. I’ve never liked the concept of “rights”; they make no sense to me. In this case, it is very clear that the king has the power, in Saudi Arabia, to grant women the right to vote. But the commenter would call this “recognizing their right to vote”. It is as if only god or nature could “give” a right to vote, or that (as a libertarian friend once claimed) “rights are a property of people like inertia is a property of matter.”

Except that, quite clearly, they are not. If I can, with a bomb, a gun, or a blunt or pointy object, take from you your life, then your “right to life” is clearly a different sort of stuff than an object’s inertia. A “right of way” is yours if and only if someone else yields it. Rights are a social construct. A useful one, at times at least, but clearly a social construct, dependent on agreement by the parties involved.

And in that sense, yes, the king granted (or rather, is granting or will grant, given that it is not taking place immediately) women the right to vote. Which, while not perfect, is a step in the right direction.

Headline Muse 9/24

Just in case it’s a boring campaign
And the also-rans start to complain
Now another straw poll
Might have taken its toll
With the Florida vote raising Cain

Headline: Herman Cain Wins Early Florida Test Vote

More meaningless straw poll results imbued with great meaning by all those who want to pretend the GOP race is still open. If the straw polls don’t predict well, the next step will be to examine the entrails of a goat.

Headline News, 9/22

A decision that’s rather surreal—
The state senator made an appeal
To eliminate waste
That’s of questionable taste
The condemned get no choice of last meal

Headline: Texas Prisons End Special Last Meals In Executions

Lawrence Russell Brewer, who was executed Wednesday for the hate crime slaying of James Byrd Jr. more than a decade ago, asked for two chicken fried steaks, a triple-meat bacon cheeseburger, fried okra, a pound of barbecue, three fajitas, a meat lover’s pizza, a pint of ice cream and a slab of peanut butter fudge with crushed peanuts. Prison officials said Brewer didn’t eat any of it.

Gee, I wonder if something put him off his feed?

While extensive, Brewer’s request was far from the largest or most bizarre among the 475 Texas inmates put to death.

On Tuesday, prisoner Cleve Foster’s request included two fried chickens, French fries and a five-gallon (19-liter) bucket of peaches. He received a reprieve from the U.S. Supreme Court but none of his requested meal. He was on his way back to death row, at a prison about 45 miles east of Huntsville, at the time when his feast would have been served.

Last week, inmate Steven Woods’ request included two pounds of bacon, a large four-meat pizza, four fried chicken breasts, two drinks each of Mountain Dew, Pepsi, root beer and sweet tea, two pints of ice cream, five chicken fried steaks, two hamburgers with bacon, fries and a dozen garlic bread sticks with marinara on the side. Two hours later, he was executed.

Years ago, a Texas inmate even requested dirt for his final meal.

For the record, I hate, hate, hate the death penalty. The notion that the state can kill someone in my name (I take it personally; it’s my country and my state) is repulsive to me.

The idea of a last meal, though. I have one. It features multiple members of the pie family, from meat to fruit. But gee, now that a Texas state senator has decided that getting one special meal before they kill you is coddling, I guess I’ll just have to keep away from Texas, just in case I do something illegal there, like be an atheist.

What would your last meal be? Let’s assume you’re not on death row, but somehow know this is your last meal–or the last one you will appreciate. What’s on your menu?

Headline Muse, 9/18

Though the church fears the atheist danger
There’s more risk from a friend than a stranger
And when pastors compete
With the church down the street
Best beware of the dog in the manger!

Headline: Man accused of killing wife, wounding 2 pastors

Ok, it might be a stretch–Aesop’s “dog in the manger” basically growled “I can’t have it, but neither can you!”; in this terrible tragedy, the motives are not yet settled. The shooter and his wife were former members of the church the two pastors ran; it may not be such a stretch to think there was some envy involved.

I hate church shootings. I hate all shootings, but church shootings are a special case. Growing up, church was presented as a sanctuary; if you came in, you were welcomed and treated with kindness. Today, I read a headline like this and know (of course I don’t know) that the shooter was a member or former member of the congregation, and that tears me apart. And some day, perhaps some self-identified atheist will be the shooter, and that will make everyone forget all the other shootings, and forget that the fights within religion are far more representative of history than the recent atheist surge.