“George Bush on steroids”? No, more insidious than that.

They breed them and train them in Texas, to vex us,
Political candidates, year after year;
Because of their vast preparation, the nation
Is helpless to stop them, and trembles with fear.
Like mutant quadrennial locusts, they’re focused
On taking as much, and as fast, as they can
The seventeen species of schmoozing they’re using
Are only one part of their devious plan

The primary process should winnow the minnows
And leave us with only the biggest of fish
But somehow the Texans survive all their rivals
No matter how strongly against it we wish
If only some cowboy from Austin had lost in
A recent election, I’d feel more at ease—
But all bets are off, till we vote us a POTUS…
So I’m curled in the corner and whimpering “please….”