Stories of young black men becoming automatic suspects if anything goes awry within a five-mile radius of them are depressingly common. We have this latest example when it appears that a woman unknowingly left her phone behind in her Uber ride. After entering the lobby of the Arlo hotel in Soho in New York City and discovering that her phone was missing, she saw a 14-year old black adolescent who was with his parents using a phone and immediately accused him of stealing it and proceeded to tackle him to the ground. All of this was captured on security videos and also by the boy’s father.
Inevitably the woman, who has not yet been publicly identified, has been rechristened as ‘Arlo Karen’ or ‘Soho Karen’.
She then ran away and police put out a call for help in identifying her. She called in to CNN and claimed that she was the victim in the whole incident. The police say that she has since been identified, which should not have been hard since she was apparently registered at the hotel, and are looking for her but she seems to be not in hiding.
The NYPD claimed they were looking for SoHo Karen and that she was wanted for multiple crimes.
They aren’t.
She’s literally out and about, not even wearing a mask that conceals her face or identity, buying McDonalds.
— Shaun King (@shaunking) January 2, 2021
While such stories have become depressingly common, one thing that struck me was that this woman was clearly in a panic over the loss of her phone. I wonder how much of her irrational behavior was due to the fact that the phone has become so essential to her that its loss would make her go berserk. Her cry of “Please get my phone back! I cannot not have my phone!” is indicative of the fact that she views the device as such an integral part of her life that she cannot live without it.
Ah, another use of that proper name as an epithet.
(and people call me insensitive!)
I rather like the slang term “smombie” for someone who walks looking at their smartphone oblivious to everything around them.
I remain puzzled as why they feel the need to look at their smartphone constantly. What are they looking at?
A few snippets from The year of Karen: how a meme changed the way Americans talked about racism:
The real story here is not the violent entitlement of this one piece of garbage, but rather the connivance of the hotel staff and, it now appears, the police, in supporting her. I’m amazed her name isn’t yet widely known. Come on Internet!
i thought that too, the phone as the center of her life. She is said to be 22, and I know many of that age who are as completely panicked without a phone. They have no life skills of any kind, and rely on the phone to run their lives for them. They also think that their troubles are the center of universe, and that the world needs to drop everything to attend to them.
I was really shocked at the viciousness of her attack on the teen. If I’d been that kid’s parent, my heart would have stopped. She really meant to hurt him, and she might even have had a weapon of some kind. The poor kid didn’t fight back, just twisted to get away without strikng her or anything.
But, she is not just supremely entitled, she’s dangerously entitled.
But, as was said @4, the hotel staff was nothing but enabling: their actions displayed that they think that a white woman is entiteld to throw a fit, accuse their guests, and then attack guests, in the hotel lobby. I’m used to dealing with entitled children of that age, and what one does is insist that the entitled tantrum end immediately, before any addressing their concerns will be done. If they don’t control themselves, they must leave or be taken away. No speaking or listening to them until they control themselves.
blf quotes some willy opining:
Special enough to merit a novel soubriquet, obviously.
Special enough to merit blog posts and media attention, too. Obviously.
Also: “People are not out to get you for the most part”.
vs
“I’m amazed her name isn’t yet widely known. Come on Internet!”
garnetstar:
<snicker>
Shame you didn’t meet 22-yo me, you might have learned some humility.
Sure — call the authorities to take care of things.
No entitlement there, nosiree!
(You don’t even see the irony, do ya?)
Bah.
From the clip:
The problem at hand is that an adult battered a minor.
??????
John Morales,
people in general weren’t out to get her UNTIL SHE ASSAULTED THE YOUNG MAN.
robertbaden, “People are not out to get you for the most part” was written AFTER SHE ASSAULTED THE YOUNG MAN.
More to the point, I was contrasting contradictory claims.
For another example:
Holms: “The problem at hand is that an adult battered a minor.”
vs
garnetstar: “I’m used to dealing with entitled children of that age”.
Even though it’s appropriate in this case, my issue with “Karen” is that it has very quickly morphed into a name misogynists feel empowered to toss against any woman speaking up.
My issue with Shaun King is that he’s a grifter.
Somehow, DailyKos.com managed to describe a prime example of female obnoxious white entitlement misbehavior without once using the K-word -- what’s happening to traditional Internet values? (Hat-tip to Lynna at the Pharyngula Political Madness thread.)
Tabby Lavalamp,
What’s strange to me is hearing other white people using it. Wonder how many of them are no different.
I saw a video of this woman stating she is Puerto Rican, which adds another layer of strangeness to Anglos calling her a Karen. Not that Spanish descended cultures don’t have a lot of racism.
John Morales, you’re not getting it. For children of any age throwing tantrums, the way to deal with it is the same: no addressing of their concerns until they can control themselves. If they can’t, remove them from any situation where such behavior isn’t acceptable.
If you’d ever brought up a 4-year-old, you’d know what I mean.
garnetstar, your prescription requires domination of that child — that is, the ability to enforce your will over theirs. Sounds like fine parenting!
@16, there is a reason children are not considered fully autonomous. Not engaging in discussion until a child has calmed down is appropriate teaching in most situations where the child is overreacting to common situations.
Since you are so critical of the suggested teaching method, how would you teach a child to control their behavior, ensure it is proportional?
I suppose garnetstars point may be as simple as that that 22 year old woman of Puerto Rican descent clearly was not taught proportional behavior as a child.
That 22 year old woman’s follow ups indicate she wishes to be treated as though she has autonomy, and not as a child or someone with severe mental illness. I’m willing to grant her that. She should be prosecuted for assault and have her freedom limited for a year or so to reflect on her behavior.
Dominating other people or children is a regular occurrence and isn’t bad, per se. Obviously an assailant acting to harm others should be dominated, their will overridden.
Context is everything. It feels stupid to have to even type this.
@1, I do feel you may have a sound point, there. Really want to ask the 1 Karen I personally know, now, but she’s more of an acquaintance than friend.
Referring to Uncle Sam leaves a slightly bad taste in my mouth, especially since I find Brother Ali’s take on it too accurate.
Sam:
To the first, I wouldn’t. I have zero interest in teaching children to control their behaviour, and have made sure I’m never in a circumstance where I would need to do something like that.
Not that garnetstar was talking about teaching; the proposal was about controlling the specific incident.
And I’m critical of it only in the sense that I specified: it relies on being able to enforce one’s will upon the upset person.
To the second: garnetstar wrote “I’m used to dealing with entitled children of that age [22 years old], and what one does is insist that the entitled tantrum end immediately, before any addressing their concerns will be done.”, clearly addressing the actual situation chronicled in the featured video. It’s about what to do in that circumstance, not what should have been done when the person was a child.
So your supposition is unwarranted.
The impression I got was that garnetstar was boasting that they could have just insisted the person cease acting out, on the basis of their familiarity with dealing with children’s tantrums. Which is amusingly self-deluded and conceited.
I like that you’re always game to explain yourself John.
It’s also informative for me to see how differently we process the comments.
#10 Morales
The article was written on the topic of ‘Karen’ becoming an epithet, and was published at about the same time that this took place. It was not written in response to it.
#16
Yes, that is a large part of parenting. You meant the parting line as sarcasm, but it is actually true.
Holms:
‘
I’ll take your word for it.
But robertbaden’s claim is still wrong, in that light.
Besides, if it’s supposed to apply to any person to whom the epithet ‘Karen’ is applied, then it should apply to this particular person, too.
Well, I’m not very good at enforcing my will on others, so I suppose I’d’ve been a shitty parent. Luckily, I’ve successfully avoided that fate.
(Your attitude perfectly fits the milieu within which I grew up; I am no stranger to corporal punishment, lock-ups, food denial, and other such methods of enforcement. I still have some scars from it.
Much of it in loco parentis, but it all counts, right? And I’ve turned out fine, so there you go!)
I agreed with “domination of that child — that is, the ability to enforce your will over theirs” as a component of parenting, and you appear to have taken that as endorsement of all methods of enforcement and punishment. Why?
John Morales
Not really.
chigau, exactly.
Made me the fine contumacious specimen I am today.
—
Holms:
Why not? You made no exclusions.
But fine, I’ll bite: what are, in your estimation, the proper methods of enforcing one’s will over another?
Nor any inclusions. I stated that a parent enforcing their will is a large part of parenting, why would you take that as endorsing every method of enforcement? Some are simply abuse.