Where is ‘teaching a class of 50 students’ on this scale?

Just asking, since that’s what I’ll be doing next month.

Also on that list…gosh, I miss going to the movie theater. A hot summer evening like tonight would be exactly the time I’d walk down to the theater, no matter what was playing, to sit back and enjoy the atmosphere, and the air conditioning. I haven’t done that in a long time. High risk, huh…guess I won’t be doing that for a while.

What we have here is a shocking failure of imagination

The poor man. Jimmy Flores came down with a serious case of COVID-19: life-threatening symptoms, hospitalized, breathing tube, the works. He’s getting better now, fortunately, but he was mystified about how he got into this state.

“I would never have imagined in a million years that I would get this virus the way that I did,” becoming so sick about a week after, Flores said.

Before his collapse, he had chosen to attend the reopening of a bar in Scottsdale — a packed bar with 300-500 people.

Totally mystifying.

The “Home of the People Lovers” is going to kill us

I just had to make a harrowing trip to our local grocery store — harrowing, because no one wears face masks around here, I’ve seen one employee routinely wear one, and as I run my errands I see old people, middle-aged people, young people milling about, often stopping for annoying chit-chat with Ole and Lena in the aisles. I swear, when the pandemic comes swirling back into this county, the central locus for infection will be this store…and the churches. This community simply does not take the threat seriously. Except for the bubble of the university, this is also a county that went for Trump, by the way.

The headline on the Minneapolis Star Tribune right now is “Walz might mandate face masks”. Might. This is madness. The entire country was pretending that the pandemic was over, opening businesses, encouraging everyone to get out and shop and drink and celebrate, when nothing had changed, and now that the numbers are starting to rise again, there is this dull, dim glimmering that gosh, maybe we ought to do something to prevent the spread of disease. They’re going to be dilatory about it all, of course.

It’s not just Texas and Florida. We’ve got these indecisive, dishonest weasels working behind the scenes up here in Minnesota, too.

And goddamn, Willie’s SuperValu, get your act together. You’ve got a “coronavirus alert” link on your web page that hasn’t been updated since early April, and you haven’t taken a single responsible action to limit the spread of disease in your store, other than raising your prices.

There’s no drama like YouTube drama

You’ve probably heard the old joke about how academic squabbles are so vicious because the stakes are so low. Academic pettiness pales in comparison to the nastiness of peak YouTube stars. The latest saga is a lot of vicious gossip between ‘famous’ people on YouTube who I’ve never heard of before and never watch, yet who make millions of dollars off cheesy videos that fans flock to. I don’t understand any of it, but don’t watch their videos, just read this article that summarizes “The New Shane Dawson-Tati Westbrook-Jeffree Star YouTube Drama”. You should feel content to say “who?” and just ignore them.

However, the deeper problem is either YouTube itself, or humanity in general. YouTube has cleverly boxed themselves in with an arcane self-reinforcing algorithm that rewards the worst people — think Pewdiepie, or Jake and Logan Paul, or Shane Dawson — who have no talent at all, no useful information, no skills except for self-promotion, and vaults them to the top of the charts and rewards them with buckets of cash. Furthermore, one of the secrets of success exemplified by the four I just named is pandering to children. Those four specialize in doing stupid shit as adults performing for kids and acquire hordes of uncritical followers as a consequence, and YouTube is a willing accomplice.

Stop incentivizing garbage, YouTube. You’ve got to realize that something has gone horribly wrong when you see the outcome of your algorithm, which seems to favor Nazis and pedophiles and, as always, no-talent hacks.

Comma comma comma conspiracy, You come and go, you come and go

I wish he would go. About 5 or 6 years ago, this wackaloon named Terry Dean, Nemmers decided I was part of a conspiracy and started dunning me, the university, random county officials, etc. with demands that I submit to him the proof that I was a perfidious scofflaw, which I’m not, making it rather difficult to hand him the evidence he wanted, since it doesn’t exist. I nick-named him Comma because of his weird punctuation, which is apparently some sovereign citizen gimmick to make him immune to legal action. I could have named him Question Mark because of his affectation of arranging all of his sentences to turn them into questions.

Anyway, he hasn’t gone away. He still cc’s me all of these demands. Conspiracy nuts just can’t let it go.

The latest incoherent screed is below the fold, just in case you wanted to marvel at his persistence. I’ve removed addresses and phone numbers — he loves to dump all that kind of information into his complaints.

[Read more…]

The word from on high: WEAR A MASK

Our chancellor has confirmed what I thought was obvious. We’re going to be masked up on campus from now on.

As we make plans for our fall return to campus, there have been many questions concerning the use of masks and other face coverings. In my June 5 message I shared initial guidance on this topic. Over the last several weeks, however, the research, guidance, and advice we have received from medical experts and public health officials has evolved.

We now know a simple face covering provides valuable protection against the spread of COVID-19. We know that it’s possible to carry COVID-19 with no apparent symptoms and unknowingly infect others; face coverings reduce the chance that individuals might unknowingly infect others. We also know masks and face coverings send strong visual cues reminding us all to take precautions to protect our health and the health of our neighbors, colleagues, and friends. Together, the physical protection and visual reminders provided by masks and face coverings can help us all support our community as we come back together on campus.

We know, too, that extra precautions may be appropriate in communities that have higher levels of COVID-19 spread, or risk of spread, due to larger populations, shared living environments, and other factors. We have such communities on campus and must exercise caution accordingly.

Given these developments, I am updating our earlier recommendation on the use of masks.

Effective July 1 and continuing until rescinded, all University of Minnesota students, faculty, staff, and visitors (including contractors, service providers, vendors, and suppliers) are required to use a face covering at all times when in any enclosed or indoor space on University campuses and properties with the following exceptions:

  • When eating or drinking; however, physical distancing must be practiced.
  • In your assigned on-campus apartment or residence hall room.
  • When you are alone in a room or where a posted and official University notice indicates masks are not needed.
  • When you are alone in a motor vehicle.
  • If you are unable to wear a face covering while exercising at the Cougar Sports Center or Regional Fitness Center.
  • In labs or other places that instead require use of a respirator.
  • If you require accommodations for health or disability reasons. On the Morris campus, the Disability Resource Center and Human Resources can help identify needed accommodations.

The full face covering protocol can be found at the Return to Campus website. An extensive FAQ is also available online.

I take exception to some of the exceptions, though. There’s no reason not to wear a mask while exercising; if you have a serious respiratory problem that prevent you from wearing one, exercise outdoors. Otherwise, the fitness center is going to be a major source of problems, especially given that it is a community resource and I’ve often seen older people using, for instance, the indoor track. The “health or disability” reason is just a gaping loophole, given that so many healthy people are trying to argue that they get to be exempt from the rules. Be specific: you need an official accommodation from our health center.

Randy Rainbow was much more entertaining with the same message.

At least Mothman never owned slaves

I would support the effort by West Virginians to replace Confederate monuments with statues of Mothman.

Now Minnesota, though — we need to rethink those giant statues honoring Paul Bunyan before the environmentalists notice. I recommend more statues celebrating spiders, in every town.

Dreaming about mushrooms all night long

Yesterday, for dinner, we had mushrooms. I like mushrooms, and growing up my father was into gathering chanterelles in the cathedral-like forests of the Pacific Northwest, but I’d always sort of taken them for granted and put little thought into using them in our meals. But yesterday, on a whim, I decided to try portobello caps as yet another meat substitute, and I was blown away. I ended up having dreams about more mushrooms, which may be a weird sign that the fungus is taking over my brain.

Anyway, they were perfect, savory and with a light texture, and it’s more likely that they just tasted so darned good rather than that hyphae are infiltrating my brain stem. My recipe is easy: get some big ol’ portobello caps, put them lamellae side up on a baking sheet, and pour in a mixture of balsamic vinegar, olive oil, and garlic. Let ’em soak for a half hour, then bake at 450°F for half an hour. For the last 5 minutes of that, add some shredded cheese, let it get all melty, and serve directly from the oven.

Wow. It was so good. I limit my trips to the grocery store (Remember? COVID-19? It’s not over) which means I can’t go again until next weekend, but I’m definitely stocking up on more mushrooms next time.

Officer Karen was victimized by the Hamburglar

Oh, dear. I read the intro to this video and was concerned about what horrific abuse this officer of the law experienced.

Stacey who has been a cop for 15 yrs went to @McDonalds
She paid for it in advance and this is how she gets treated for being a cop. Come on America. We are better than this.

Given that cops have been pepper spraying and shooting rubber bullets with wild abandon, and have been murdering black people for years, I braced myself for some terrible and nearly equivalent atrocity experienced by this woman.

It’s a bit of a letdown.

She breaks down in tears because her Egg McMuffin was late! They didn’t get part of her order to her in a timely fashion! OH THE HUMANITY!

Conservative wackaloons are all over this example of gross injustice. “We are better than this”, sure…then have some sympathy for the minimum wage, stressed out service worker who didn’t get a McMuffin to a cop fast enough.

By the way, you always pay for it in advance. That’s the way the drive up window works at McDonalds: first you pay at one window, then you drive up to a second window to get your food. If there’s a delay in your order they send you to a spot to park for a bit so you don’t hold up the line. That’s not a special punishment for cops only.

Snowflakes. They’re all snowflakes.