Kevin Smith is too fat for the sky

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Kevin Smith, the writer and raconteur, was recently booted from a plane for being too fat. He’s a big guy, but not so big he doesn’t fit in an airplane seat — so this looks like some weird, nasty, rude policy being pushed by Southwest Airlines. It’s an injustice, but it’s also hilarious, because Kevin Smith is the kind of guy who can turn it into a 1½ hour rant.

It’s also amusing because Smith has 1½ million followers on Twitter, and he tweeted the whole escapade. He has far more followers than Southwest Airlines, and while maybe they’re trying to say their side of the story on the airline’s blog, Smith’s readers have melted their blog down.

It was a wonderfully awful PR move. You do not cross Kevin Smith, or he’ll turn you into a story in a long monologue.


I’m rather disappointed in some of the comments here. All the whining about “I don’t want to sit next to a fat person” is deplorable — look at yourselves. Are you perfect?

I do a lot of flying, and I’ve had to sit next to a few very large people who are much larger than Kevin Smith. It was a far more pleasant experience than sitting next to a) the chain smoker who reeked of cigarettes and was jittering the whole time, b) the drunk guy who hadn’t bathed in a few days, c) the couple with the baby who cried the whole flight, d) the little old lady who had to get up every 10 minutes to use the bathroom, e) the evangelical who tried to witness to me, or f) the young lady who was chronically airsick.

When you get on an airplane, you are voluntarily joining a cross-section of humanity who will be packed as tightly as the airline can squeeze you into the flying tin can. You will discover that people are diverse. Sometimes they will annoy you, and sometimes you will annoy them. Get used to it. Learn to be tolerant with the expectation that others will tolerate you.

The bottom line for me is that Kevin Smith was healthy, mobile, and fit (perhaps tightly) into the narrow volume of space allotted him. He did not require special assistance, did not demand special privileges, and was accommodating to his neighbors. He should have been allowed to fly, but was selectively discriminated against.

Weight was just an excuse.

But he doesn’t know my mom

This article on why an octopus is more awesome than your mom is generally accurate and valid — octopuses probably are more awesome than your mom — but suffers a bit from an incomplete survey of moms. The author has not met the awesome mom of me, nor is he acquainted with the ferocious Trophy Wife™, who also happens to moonlight as the indomitable Trophy Mother™.

Otherwise, though, it is an acceptable overview of octopodal merits.

Teach both sides!

I’d recommend that every school board member who proposes that we teach both sides of the evolution “controversy” view this movie, except they’re usually such delicate prudes who get outraged at tone that they’d probably have a heart attack at the profanity in this clip.

Wait…maybe that’s an additional reason they should watch it!