Poseur!

Approximately 1.4 million people have emailed me with a link to this article on body modification (I’m not complaining, do feel free to send me stuff). It includes this picture.

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I’m sorry, but no thanks. That’s a wanna-be kluge. It’s pathetic. The guy has just had some kind of silicone rings stuck under his skin, and I am unimpressed.

Here’s what I want.

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Give me a call when we’ve got gene modification and some method of reiterating ontogenesis in my arms. I want neural control of a sophisticated muscular structure, not some inert faux lump. Adding sharp-edged teeth to the structure is optional, but highly desirable.

And all those tatoos? Bugger those, too. I want these:

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Imagine a whole network of those under your skin, linked by nerves to your brain, with the ability to change color and pattern under conscious control.

I sneer at anything less. The body-modification crowd is hampered by feeble imaginations that think needles and ink and holes and bumps are impressive — I’m holding out for something a little more substantial than cosmetic geegaws.

You people know some interesting people

Ken Cope, a regular commenter here (come on, you guys all know him) sent along some cephalopodian artwork a friend of his does. After browsing a bit, it was sinking in: Ken is friends with an animation artist and roller derby star, one who wins awards for most penalties in a season no less, and who paints toilet seats for fun. How cool is that?

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And people think I’m strange…

If I’m ever in LA, you’re going to have to introduce me, Ken. I have fond memories of watching roller derby with my great-grandmother.