This. Is. CONSERVATISM!


It’s getting awfully gossipy up there in the highest governmental institutions. Boebert and Greene are fighting.

It’s no secret that the relationship between Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert has never been worse. They’ve yelled at each other on and off the floor. Greene recently called Boebert a “little bitch” to her face. And Boebert supported Greene’s removal from the Freedom Caucus.

But, lawmakers told The Daily Beast, the situation between the two is still even worse than most people think.

“A fistfight could break out at any moment,” Rep. Tim Burchett (R-TN) told The Daily Beast.

Can we get some hair-pulling, too? Screeching and clawing with long nails? Is this an episode of Housewives of Washington DC or what?

Another Republican lawmaker who is close to both Greene and Boebert told The Daily Beast that the situation was a tinderbox.

“You can’t have too many of these rifts for too long,” this lawmaker said.

Another GOP member suggested that one of them would destroy the other—they just didn’t know who would come out on top.

“They will be nailing that coffin shut,” this lawmaker said, “and one of them is still in there kicking and screaming!”

Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ) compared Greene and Boebert’s battle to that of a “two-way sword.”

“I just think that whatever is there, could be utilized both ways,” he said, adding that “people make decisions that they have to work and live by, and you kind of hate being in their shoes.”

After Greene called Boebert a “little bitch” to her face on the House floor, Greene was summarily booted from the House Freedom Caucus. And while Boebert could have probably helped save Greene from that embarrassment by defending her to the group, she instead chose to agree with fellow Freedom Caucus members, voting for Greene’s dismissal.

The “Freedom” Caucus was already a joke, with some of the worst people in congress gathering together to pressure everyone else to bow to their terrible politics, but this just makes it simultaneously worse and more laughable.

While the HFC was founded on not allowing showier, less serious conservative voices to join its ranks—like Louie Gohmert (R-TX) and Steve King (R-IA)—that thinking has been a thing of the past for years. The Freedom Caucus eventually even let Gohmert join its ranks. (Both members are now gone from Congress.)

By the time Greene and Boebert arrived in Congress just days before the Jan. 6 insurrection, the Freedom Caucus was allowing almost any rambunctious conservative to join. It had, after all, primarily become a pro-Donald Trump group and less of the ideological organization formed to fight for a more open process in Congress.

And now it’s a forum for petty high school drama. I hope this makes it less effective.

Remember when Congress was all about dignity and decorum? Nah, I don’t either.

Comments

  1. cartomancer says

    Randy Rainbow hasn’t done this particular spat yet, but it’s kind of there in germ in his parody from five months ago

  2. birgerjohansson says

    Double posting, please erase.
    (Usually the system stops this from happening)

  3. birgerjohansson says

    Double posting, please erase.
    (Usually the system stops this from happening)

  4. birgerjohansson says

    I advocate cudgels and maces. The crunching sound of bones breaking will make this a big spectator sport. Also, it will filter out yellow politicians like Dubya.

  5. Reginald Selkirk says

    Greene recently called Boebert a “little …”

    Greene is only 5’3″ tall. I can’t find a height for Boebert.

  6. wzrd1 says

    I dunno, I seem to recall that Boebert had promised to carry a concealed firearm into the capitol.
    I recommend machine guns at dawn. Wielded by their peers.
    And ballistic glass panels for spectators to witness the circular firing squad.

    BTW, whatinhell is a two way sword? I only remember double edged swords.

    As for one destroying the other, I have far more faith in them both, I’m sure they can destroy themselves and their party or at least the HFC.

  7. says

    It’s hilarious that this recent fight is about who gets to fund raise over being the one who introduced articles of impeachment for Biden.

    Anyway, my money is on Greene coming out on top. She strikes me as being both more batshit than Boebert but also smarter than her (don’t get me wrong, neither are geniuses). More importantly, her seat is safer.

  8. Doc Bill says

    Historian Alan Lichtman observes that the former Republican Party is now the Trump Party; there are no “mainstream” Republicans because the Boeberts, Gosars and Greenes are the mainstream.

    The prancing, performance art side show is now the Center Ring. Look at the Defense bill this week. Totally wrecked by the “Freedumb Caucus.” It’s not a silent majority, rather a very loud minority that controls the former Republican Party. All of the so-called mainstream candidates – Pence, Meatball Ron, Nikkky – except for Chris Christie – snivel at the feet of T**** cowering in fear of a mean tweet. But, make no mistake, that mean tweet controls the entire Trump Party base. That’s why none of the snivelers have a chance.

    But, think about this. T**** could win. He has a definite chance of defying reality, AGAIN, and take the White House. Can you imagine the grift, graft, corruption and chaos that would bring to the country and the world? The first T**** term took an axe to the government; a second would use a wrecking ball.

  9. Artor says

    Do Empty G and Boebert still qualify as housewives? Aren’t the champions of “family values” both divorced now, or on their way?

  10. birgerjohansson says

    Crazies taking over the body of what was a mostly malign but rational body.
    .
    I am reminded of those creepy parasites who control the brains of their victims. Toxoplasma gondii is the least revolting of them.

    I also recall a Quatermass episode -I think it was The Quatermass Experiment- where humans were summoned to be used up, turned into a powder by extra-terrestrials.
    Really, if the new leaders had been the lizard people David Icke rants about it would at least make some kind of sense.

    Instead it is just some destructive medieval cult out of time, staggering along towards a cliff edge and dragging everyone else with it.

  11. says

    The HFC never was sane. One of the proposed titles back in 2015, when they wanted to block DHS funding, had “nutjob” in the title. That was too self-aware, so they went with “freedom.’

  12. mikey says

    That quote from Gosar, wow. Reminds me of Dave Barry describing some similar nitwit as
    “where most people have a brain, he has a Wac-a-Mole game.”

  13. lotharloo says

    Throw in the ladies in the ring with Musk and Zuck. We could have a 2v2 mixed team fight! Let’s go! The winner are shipped with a rocket to Mars.

  14. jeanmeslier says

    @Akira MacKenzie #23
    On what ?Being useful idiots for the GOP(fascists), who are after practically EVERY civil rights, and not just in the US, the culture war is fought by so called conservatives all over the world. Against LGBTQ people, aginast abortion, against porgressive ideas of all kind, and the only thing you deem appropriate is whining “bout dem librulz”?

  15. whheydt says

    All things considered, if one of them destroys the other, I kind of hope that it’s Boebert that is the “victor”. Boebert barely squeaked by in her last election, so there’s a decent chance she could lose the next one. If she manages to destroy Greene on the way out, so much the better.

  16. DanDare says

    All seems a bit “look, squirrel!” to me.
    Avoid Trump & Co legal troubles.
    Avoid talking economy and the welfare of the population.
    Just have a showy fight.

  17. tacitus says

    Other government chambers can get pretty feisty too — Prime Minister’s Question Time in the British House of Commons is probably the most famous example, but I in Australia years ago when a dustup broke out over accusations spitting, and fistfights have broken out in Japan’s parliament more than once.

    The difference? In these other cases, the representatives are getting passionate and angry over real issues that affect their constituents, not some made up bullshit conspiracy theory nonsense.

  18. says

    I recommend a comprehensive high school test, like the three hour exams when was in grade 12.

    The first to get 75% right gets out – but only if completed in a fixed time.

    The loser/s has/have to work in one of Manchin’s coal mines. Permanently.

  19. KG says

    At least conservatives appear to fight for something. – drew@12

    So, drew, tell us what you fight for – making the world safe for Russian fascism, perhaps – and what you’ve done in that line recently, other than post here.

  20. says

    Also tell us what the conservatives are fighting for. The right to harm children with impunity? The right to subvert democracy?

  21. GerrardOfTitanServer says

    Also tell us what the conservatives are fighting for. The right to harm children with impunity? The right to subvert democracy?

    The right to keep non-white people in their place, and keep women in their place, and take as much money from the poor people as they can to keep them in their place. I’d guess that the right to harm children with impunity is just a perk. And the conservatives have never been pro-democracy – you know the phrase, if they had to choose between their politics and democracy, they’d sacrifice democracy.

    I don’t agree with any of what they want, obviously.

  22. says

    At least conservatives appear to fight for something.

    Yeah, I guess that’s true, if fighting for the destruction of everyone and everything that doesn’t fit into their small, simple worldview can be called “fighting for something.”

  23. GerrardOfTitanServer says

    Raging Bee
    Naw. They’re not for the elimination of women, less races, and poor people. They need slaves to do their work for them. Not joking. Actually serious.

  24. Akira MacKenzie says

    I’m just saying that Trumpists were willing to throw a violent coup when they lost the last election.

    What did liberals do when Roe was overturned, I mean besides pose in front on TV cameras with signs?

    It’s no bloody fucking wonder why the fascists are winning.

  25. GerrardOfTitanServer says

    Akira
    Please stop with this fallacious reasoning “this plan sucks, therefore there must be a better one”. Attempting our violent coup is not a better plan.