I’m relieved, I was feeling left out. Surely there aren’t any weird crank ‘wellness’ things for penises, are there? I’m not going to try and slide a jade egg up my urethra, after all.
But behold, there is something almost as bizarre. It’s Jiftip! It’s basically a piece of tape to put over the tip of your penis to prevent ejaculation.
Gunter explains why this was a bad idea, but I figured it out from the ad copy. It’s either very poorly written, or they’re hinting at horrors which will occur if you use this product. Or both.
Cover the tip and seal it tight. Nothing gets in or out until you remove it. Make sure and remove it in time.
In time for what? What happens if you don’t remove it in time? How do you know when the time is right?
An indoor penis party
IS IT SAFE TO HAVE AN INDOOR JIZZ-FEST-to hold everything inside? Feel safe-be safe requires you pull-out, remove the feel shield and ejaculate. That’s it, safe and worry-free. Oh, if she notices tears in your eyes, let her believe that it’s true love.
I’m already kind of squicked out at INDOOR JIZZ-FEST
, but being safe requires that you pull out and remove the device? Again, what is unsafe about all of this? Will my penis explode?
And hang on there, I might cry after using it, and I’m supposed to lie to her about true love?
Ominous. I’m not liking this at all. Don’t read the testimonials.
I wonder if calculating the back pressure that would produce would count towards my PE experience… O.o
They’s wrong fer that!!
I might be being very naive here, but… why? What on earth is this supposed to actually do?
And why not just use a little tiny cock cork? (of course MINE would be enormous!!!) (OH! And you try saying “cock cork” quickly 20 times….)
A Jade Egg…for Men.
While I’m on a roll…
Cartomancer
When a Mummy and a Daddy are in love, but not enough in love to want to actually want to become a Mummy and a Daddy….
richardelguru @6
Well played, sir, quite well played.
fusilier
James 2:24
There’s no mention in there of a removal chemical for the adhesive…
Ah… brings to mind a term from a previous career of mine… “retrograde ejaculation.” Never thought anyone would happily create another cause of it.
So… it’s an alternative to a condom. That doesn’t actually work, and costs more. But with added new-age spirit woo.
Is that the deal here?
This is Mensez for men. Which, as a reminder, “is simply a stick of glue to…glue…your vagina…shut.”
This new woo-woo has the slight advantage it conceivably could work, at least until the pressure builds up enough to cause something to explode. Whether it’s the internal value / plumbing, external glued-on cork, or, uh, shaft, I won’t speculate, but none sounds like a very good idea. Although the mildly deranged penguin points out there will be plenty of LOUD screaming, which is is a plus…
@blf:
Right, that’s why I was thinking that this idea sounds very familiar.
Is this what Moochylini meant when he complained that Bannon was cock-blocking him?
Retrograde ejaculation where the semen is diverted into the bladder is and was sometimes induced intentionally (“coitus saxonicus”). However the urethra is blockedby squeezing the perineum or the base of the penis, not at the very end.
Further I do not think that removing a patch of sticky material from the tip of the glans would be an experience one would want to repeat with any regularity whatsoever. The pressures involved are probably actually pretty high so the glue would have to stick pretty strongly. Ouch. Any pleasure thus gained due to the lack of barrier (condom), seems thus nullified.
The failure rate would in all probability be much higher than that of condoms.
tldr: I would not even try and test it, I shudder at the very idea.
Duct tape would probably work just as well and is much cheaper.
I’d guess that the idea is to prevent any pre-ejaculation semen from getting out while you’re having your jollies, but you’re meant to pull out before ejaculation. So it’s a way to make the withdrawal method slightly more reliable as contraception, maybe? Perhaps because withdrawal isn’t really contraception, so it’s not a sin? Just buy condoms already, confess your sin, and everybody’s happy.
Further thought, I guess it might also be for the bros who want natural skin contact but not the hassle of conception. Still doesn’t do much for the risk of STDs, though.
I assume it was exactly for what NelC said at 17 – skin contact.
1. It will fall off.
2. It will be… difficult… to retrieve.
3. There will be trips to the ER to find it, whatever body cavity it happens to be stuck in.
Just the thought of it makes me eyes swell and me poo-die hurt!!
From personal experience, retrograde ejaculation is not fun. It hurts like hell and the valve that closes off the ureters during sexual arousal can tear and cause bleeding.
This is a stupid thing.
did anyone even read their advertisement?
so.. don’t use it for what their advertising it for….
I’m thinking this is some kind of troll.
oh, btw, if some guy named “Sam” comes here…
pretty sure he’s the inventor.
The image shown on Gunter’s site says “Use Condom: You feel safe, nothing else.” Bullshit! It doesn’t feel /as/ good, but it certainly feels good enough for people to reach orgasm.