Some guy challenged me to an ignorance contest by sending me this:
I conceded. There’s just not much to say about that.
Now he’s sneering at me.
@pzmyers The genius in you managed to digest all that without looking up references in under 10 minutes huh? Right. It paralysed you.
— Seventh Loka (@SevenLokas) January 9, 2015
The genius in you managed to digest all that without looking up references in under 10 minutes huh? Right. It paralysed you.
Yep. One glance, and I digested it all. Then I was paralyzed with laughter.
Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says
Nope, I was actively laugh at numerology, a pseudo-pseudo-pseudoscience. You were being laughed at for believing such tripe.
numerobis says
From Sept-Iles, Qc? Oh well, I guess religion isn’t quite dead here yet.
Michael says
I wonder if he would appreciate that Jesus wouldn’t have used the modern alphabet, nor was the original bible written in modern English, thus making has analysis pointless (A bit like translating Shakespeare’s plays into Klingon before analyzing them for hidden messages). Probably not, but a fun point to make.
Daz: Keeper of the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur of Atheism says
Then he saw ten magpies, and ran screaming for an exorcist.
robro says
I think I get it:
T H I S
7 6 5 6 = 24
I S
5 6 = 11
S T U P I D
6 7 6 3 5 4 = 31
24 + 11 + 31 = 66 = the number of books in the Bible*
Wow! It works. Just like the Bibles.
* Somebody’s Bible.
chigau (違 ,う) says
Please arrange an introduction between louismorelli and Seventh Loka.
CaitieCat, Harridan of Social Justice says
Trying to make any sense of that cross-language gibberish would make me want to get paralytic, and I don’t drink. Would that count?
Owlmirror says
is so much not a thing. Do it inHebrewעברית or GTFO.At the very least, do it in a language that actually existed during the time that the bible was written.
Amphiox says
Also, do it in a number system that was actually used during the time the bible was written….
Amphiox says
(By the people who were writing the bible….)
chigau (違 ,う) says
*God* wrote *The Bible*
did *HE* fuck it up?
knut7777 says
Hey, if English is good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for him.
Lyn M: G.R.O.S.T. (ADM) -- Membership pending says
Gosh, you guys are so picky! Insisting he use the right language, the appropriate number set, acting as if numerology were without foundation. That’s harsh!
I mean it probably took him ages to set all that up! And look, he gives accreditation to internet handles. It must be for realz!
Right? Come on, right?
Daz: Keeper of the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur of Atheism says
chigau (違 ,う) #6:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo!!!!
DrMcCoy says
Well, at least it’s released under the terms of a free culture license? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
(Or not, depending on how you view the NonCommercial clause)
chigau (違 ,う) says
mwaahahhaaaha
*cough*
hahah….
Rey Fox says
Heathen. Jesus wrote all that in the language of his chosen people: Americans.
Cuttlefish says
I knew a numerologist once.
I think maybe it would be best if we locked the two of them in a room and let them argue out their differences. If they come to an agreement before the air runs out, we can let them out.
They won’t.
David Marjanović says
Actually it’s 13.798 ± 0.037 billion years. Science Marches On.
For the New Testament, that would be this.
Daz: Keeper of the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur of Atheism says
But if you put two numerologists in a room, surely they’d multiply.
damiki says
You guys laugh, but one of the anagrams for “Ken Ham is right” is “PZ Myers is wrong” (or something close to that).
Tell me that’s not a message for the deity.
Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says
My feat is that they would cancel each other out, forming a perfect vacuum, and imploding the universe into a gigantic black hole. Or some such thing.
Daz: Keeper of the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur of Atheism says
Nerd
So numerologists come in positive and negative versions, then? I learn summat new every day. Thanks!
Cuttlefish says
How can something multiply, when it doesn’t add up in the first place?
chigau (違 ,う) says
damiki #21
It might be a message from the deity.
Daz: Keeper of the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur of Atheism says
That is a minus, yes.
Donnie says
associative principle?
WhiteHatLurker says
So Frankincense is the answer to the ultimate question!
Ask him what he got for 62 down. I can’t figure it out. 8 letters starts with A ends with E “informal for numerologist”.
Lofty says
Plus, if your congregation is big enough, you can do this stuff counting on fingers. Smaller congregations will have to take their socks off.
chigau (違 ,う) says
WhiteHatLurker #28
I’ve got one for 7 letters.
Unless you’re a Brit. Then I’ve got one for the 8.
Strangely, they mean the same thing.
woozy says
Um, How could this possibly take more than 10 minutes? Giving this the full credence and attention that I’d give a serious an legitimate research article, what requires more than 10 minutes? You assign a number to each letter in a simply linear fashion and compare sums of common phrases that are known to anyone. Okay, I *could* spend time proofing the math but I’ll take his word for it that it’s valid. So… three minutes top. Seriously, what is there to digest?
====
So, poetry requires word restriction based on syllable and meter and is every bit as puzzling and restrictive and statistically significant. So why does no-one assume that because something can be fitted into a limerick or haiku or sonnet it is somehow prophetic?
That “Vote” and “oat” and “moat” rhyme is every bit as unusual as LORD, GOD, and RNA DNA = 13. So what does “vote” “oat” and “moat” *mean*? Inquiring minds want to know.
Amphiox says
I’ll give him this. His little page makes for a more entertaining addition-practice-set for the kiddies that some of that Kumon stuff….
anteprepro says
A Hamster = 32 = Christ
Ass= 13 = God
Jism= 16 = Bible
Fucking Shit = 37 = Sixty Six
Fuckwit = 40 = A Christian
Good Cocaine Party = 53 = Christianity
The numbers don’t lie.
anteprepro says
Numerology = 33 = arsehead
congaboy says
S-E-V-E-N-T-H L-O-K-A H-U-G-E G-I-T
6-5-5-5-1-7-6 2-2-7-6 = 43 43 = 6-6-7-5 7-5-7
Coincidence? I think not!
Cuttlefish says
@#31–Alas, woozy, poetry hasn’t rhymed in decades. Love, and dove, and God above… doesn’t matter to today’s poets. Rhyming is strictly for amateurs, wannabes, doggerelists, and cuttlefish.
Or so I hear.
Saad says
chigau,
Imagine the paper resulting from that collaboration.
Rasalhague says
Being consistent, I’d have to assume that the @ symbol has the value 2.
In which case, you get:
@Sevenlokas = JESUS + MORON
vereverum says
Simon Peter went up, and drew the net to land full of great fishes, an hundred and fifty and three… (Joh 21:11)
Three digit number, the sum of the third power of each of the three digits equals the number itself.
1^3+5^3+3^3=153. Much more interesting than Seventh Loka’s stuff.
It’s called a narcissistic number.
Don’t know why I thought of it.
jez says
In other news:
GOD = 13 = NOBODY
HOLY BIBLE = 28 = GARBAGE
ATHEISM = 31 = TRUTH
This numerology stuff really works!
s3m3rs says
The devil may be in all the details, but God is apparently in all the numbers.
I dwelt on numerology for all of about 3 months. I read through that baloney in 184 seconds.
no one has to try THAT HARD to look for big G. (also, send this feller Foucault’s Pendulum STAT)
Our pastor once said to us something about “if you aren’t getting anything out of your religion, look at what you are putting into it”. What that says about this fellow is…..maybe too much Dan Brown instead of Eco?
bah, bah, bad sheep
his head might be full of wool…
I’m doing a bit of woolgathering myself….I haven’t ranted about Dan “Conspiracy” Brown in a while.
Grewgills says
@ Michael #3
That just proves his awesome power. He knew how his story would be translated into English and engineered all of that 2000 years ago. You should be extry impressed.
kc9oq says
Following the Arabic abjad system of numerals, ALLAH [in Arabic] (1+30+30+5)=66=”the number of books in the Bible” (according to SevenLokas).
I don’t even want to contemplate the implications of this…
gardengnome says
It’s all so clear to me now… I think…
Charly says
Wut?
He is not even consistent in his woo – see how he works differently with the phrase “jesus is risen lord” and “rna dna” in order to ger results that match.
davem says
I like the concept that the number equivalent of JESUS ends with ‘666’
LykeX says
vereverum #39
I’ve heard people speculate that the inclusion of that specific number of a holdover from Greek philosophical schools. Perhaps the bible story is a retelling of an earlier parable, involving some other teacher.
The bible is so much more interesting once you get rid of the notion that it’s all supposed to be literally true.
vaiyt says
The main problem I have with this pic are not the numbers, is that they’re connected with a bunch of unsupported assertions.
Moggie says
Well…
billygutter01 says
I thought, for a chuckle, that it might be fun to run through the (ahem) numbers.*
I scanned the first line, guffawed, then wandered off to fetch an adult beverage, chortling to myself.
*My math skills are poor.
brianpansky says
@6, chigau
That would be so great to watch.
brianpansky says
Also, we now see proof that it was no accident that our genetic material came to be known as DNA. It was obviously the hand of gawd which caused that to come about.
OlliP says
You can easily do it yourself with this Excel spreadsheet and find out interesting things, like
numerology = giant hoax
Have fun being a numerologist!
david says
The square root of 18900 isn’t 137.47727089, where he chose to truncate it. In decimal notation, it’s a non-repeating endless value (irrational). His formula needs more digits. Either that, or find a place where god commands him to round irrationals to 8 decimal digits.
a_ray_in_dilbert_space says
Does this guy perchance live in Oregon or Colorado? Or does he have a prescription for his inspiration.
faehnrich says
Ah, numerology. The pseudo-science of math. When you’ll accept any combination instead of a particular one, you’re extremely likely to find patterns like this. It’s kind of like the birthday problem in that regard.
congenital cynic says
That is a page of concentrated foolishness, the like of which I have not seen in a very long time. The only part of it that boggled my mind is the fact that there are people who actually believe this nonsense. Amazing, really. A total disconnect from rationality.
AJ Milne says
Re the whole ‘paralyzed’ claim, I find myself thinking if there is not yet a single adjective nor past participle in our language which means ‘convinced to not even fucking bother by the sheer inanity of and incompetence evidenced by the claim presented’, there probably should be…
(I mean, I coulda used it a few times, last year, at least.)
ChristineRose says
The original KJV contained the apocrypha, and numerous archaic spellings, and better yet, archaic letters like long-S and thorn, and use of v for u and i for j. So he’s not even using the right alphabet, unless he thinks God inspired the New International Version. It’s also fairly easy to tweak the number of books, i.e. in Jewish Bible First and Second Chronicles are a single book.
Is there a term for seeing meaning in coincidental connections? I know pareidolia is an important evolutionary adaption but surprising number of people seem to have such a strong belief in stunningly uninteresting stuff that they send tweets to random people they don’t like.
ck, the Irate Lump says
The numerologist seems to have not completely mastered counting, based on how the english alphabet was encoded. To help him out, the Fact Sphere would like to provide him with a bit of help:
PDX_Greg says
The great thing about numerologists is that they always cancel each other out.
brianpansky says
@59, ChristineRose
Take a look at apohenia and delusions of reference.
brianpansky says
My delusions of reference link didn’t work… here it is again.
s3m3rs says
brianpansky – apophenia? or apohenia? either way, you’re right ;-) i am possibly missremembering that word on the fly, mind!
Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says
@Ollip:
!???!
click, whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr……………………………………………………………………
Trebuchet says
@55:
That would be Washington, not Oregon. Home of Ophelia Benson, Dana Hunter, and myself. Also birthplace of PZ Myers!
dannorth says
@55
As noted by keen eyed Numerobis @2 the guy hails from the town of Sept-Îles, in Québec, Canada.
In all of Canada he would need a prescription for medical use but possession for personal use has been decriminilazed some years ago.
Mobius says
So
Jesus = 45666
Aha. Jesus contains the Number of the Beast. That settles it. Jesus is the Antichrist.
Crimson Clupeidae says
If you look at through a prism, made of timecube, it works!