How many fucks does America give? I don’t know, but a lot of them come out of LA and New York. This is a ‘heat map’ produced by an analysis of tweets for how often somebody says “fuck you” on twitter. In it’s current state, it’s not very useful — this is raw data, not per capita data, so all you’re really seeing is flares of general activity in the US and Canadian population centers.
If it helps, they’ve also done an analysis of how often people say “good morning”, and the distribution is different. There’s more activity in the Midwest. It still may not be meaningful, though, because here in the center of passive-aggressive niceness we say “good morning” when we mean “fuck you.”
There is nothing “good” about mornings. They are evil. I do not know why our lord and savior-he of the noodly appendage that that shall not be named-chose to create mornings. I do not like them, Sam I am.
(If I currently had a job, I wouldn’t be up this early. Gah, 8:45 am is far too early for my delicate self to awaken).
“God bless you” means “Fuck you” in the south.
I usually greet the day with “Oh no not again”
Er… hold on a tic. “General activity in the US and Canadian population centers”?
But they say they only scanned for those tweets “in 462 specific locations within United States “!
Now the Toronto coverage I’d be willing to chalk up to bleeding of the graphic across borders, but what’s with the blue over Montréal?
Did someone forget to announce their takeover again?
(…and yes, that last sentence was facetious. Hi, neighbours! *waves*)
Lookit that nice dot at Western NY and Ontario’s Golden Triangle… fuck yeah.
I assume the prevalence of “Fucke You” in New York is due to Comrade Physioproffe
“Good morning to you – and the horse you rode in on.”
God Bless you
And bless your heart.
i greet the morning with the phrase “jeesus christ I could do with a wank”. Clears the mind and puts me in a good mood for the day ;-)
How can they say that “many fucks were given”, given that I bet an awful lot of the comments were “I don’t give a fuck”? You’d have to subtract all of those from the total, if you want to know how many were actually given.
This really brings me back to the first couple of pages of The Hobbit…
I’m guessing then that all the tweets that go something like “good morning luv…I’d surely love to fuck you today.” would cancel each other out?
Also, if I were to open a discussion about this post in the heavily moderated Lounge, would I risk being banned?
I do not use twitter. How would I daily express the idea that I am raising my bare ass to the morning and telling the new day to kiss it?
That’s nice
It’s cause here in LA when people say “fuck you”, we mean “fuck you?”
DALLAS!! WHOO-HOO!
I will pray for you.
@ cervantes #2:
Along with, “Well bless your heart,” which loosely translated means, “Fuck you, you fucking fuck.”
I don’t tweet. Now, if they bugged my car and played it on the internet while I was driving. . . (Good for me they don’t… um… do they? ) (if they do, where’s my royalty check, you bastards!)
When I say “have a good one!” I usually mean it.
Even though I’m an asocial loner, I manage to wish people well.
“Right. When you will be only a little older you will doubtless learn the advantage of minding your own business. If you will be so good as to turn your head slightly to the left, you will see the door. I wish you good-afternoon.”
– a character by W. Somerset Maugham
♥ ♥ ♥
@ ibbica —
If you included the various French equivalents, Montréal would be the deepest red on the map. The bit of blue represents the spillover into English.
borkmcfink
That phrase brings to mind Marie and how she speaks to Debra (and everyone else) on Everybody Loves Raymond. She’s like the poster child of using nice phrases as insults and digs.
—
I grew up in MI I learned plenty of ways to say fuck you with a smile and “nice” phrase. Passive aggressive indeed.
In customer service, I learned to shoot daggers with the phrase, “Have a nice day”.
I try to greet the morning as close to noon as possible, so I can say hello and goodbye one right after the other.
@Janine: In our high-tech digital world, it’s sometimes comforting to fall back on a simple window.
Try a map of “Bless your heart” and you might get some interesting hits.
What about those people who say “Good fucking morning”?
Seriously, we’re talking about New York. We use “fuck” as punctuation.
What the fuck do you mean by that?
Carlie,
What the fuck do you fucking mean by that?
I just got told by the the kid’s (he has four or five seizures a day) social worker for complaining the home health aid agency that has fail show up or abandon him four times in less than six months and cost me money as I have to pay someone or leave work to cover for them at no pay.
I know now to just say “Good Morning” to the vendor’s administrative staff demonstrating a better attitude toward the good morningers.
Thank you for adding to my education and rhetoric. Us unbelievers can now confuse English as much as religion.
Maybe they’re remembering the fellow I can’t remember: it was either Lenny Bruce or George Carlin. He noted that fucking is nice, and so the phrase really should be, “Un-fuck you!”
With a hearty “I don’t want to go to work!”
I tend to start the day with “uuurrgghhh brainns coffffeeeeee”
I heard a joke about the difference between NY and CA: Californians say “Have a nice day” but mean “Fuck you!” whereas New Yorkers say “Fuck you!” and mean “Have a nice day”.
I can’t imagine continuing to follow anyone who says ‘good morning’ on Twitter. Meaningless greetings have no place in an asynchronous data flow.
“Today is the first day of the rest of my life! I just hope it doesn’t suck.”
When my sister lived in France and they complained about fake American politeness, she always said, “When I’m talking to random strangers, I’ll take fake politeness over genuine contempt.”
I greet the day with,
“Huh. Not dead yet.”
followed by
“I need to pee.”
My day usually starts when I find myself under a suddenly upturned bed with a mildly deranged penguin jumping up-and-down on the now-skyward-pointing underside yelling “Wakey wakey, there’s fresh cheeses to capture and eat!” And that’s on the quiet days…