Pondering Web Programming

i used to have fun doing redesigns of my art website, pondering doing that again.  only this time, it’s not trying to get me work, so it can be the sort of memory palace funplex of my auldest ambitions.  i can’t program my way out of a wet paper bag, leaning heavily on the one or two things i need to achieve my vision.  back in the day, that was creating a website out of tables and columns with fixed widths, filled with bespoke graphics, to make a very visually oriented interface.

i still want to do a visually oriented interface, where the page appears as an image, on which you can click the little parts to go different places, to explore.  like in sandra bullock’s The Net, where if you click on the hidden π, it plunges you into a world of danger and thrizzles.  flash shit.  anyway, flash is no longer an option, but i’m given to understand you can do a lot of the same things with html5.

the cheap tricks i’d need to learn:

  • how to do even one thing in html5 at all, haha.  css and java if absolutely necessary.
  • how to make an image scale to the window, so that on phone it’ll fill the screen and on desktop it’ll be the same proportions with some color field or tiling background to the left and right.
  • how to make different regions of the image clickable as links, without having the region selection get borked by scaling the image to different resolutions.
  • having an alternate graphic show on mouse-over would be nice.

if i could do those things, i’d probably be gravy.  also gotta buy a new domain name, i think.  the old one doesn’t fit anymore.  how can i learn enough to do those things, without really trying?

interesting video, elden ring

zullie the witch on yewtube specializes in short analytical content about the lore or technical aspects of soulsborne games.  they’ll have blood and horror content, of course, being dark fantasy.  this one is very interesting from a technical point of view, without being too complicated for the untrained to get, i think.  check it out.

Total Anarchy and Can’t Nobody Stop Us

I want to devise a virusTo bring dire straits to your environmentCrush your corporations with a mild touchTrash your whole computer system and revert you to papyrusI want to make a super virusStrong enough to cause blackouts in every single metropolis’cause they don’t want to unify usSo fuck it total anarchy and can’t nobody stop us
-Del the Funky Homosapien, Virus, from Deltron 3030 (2000)

Do you have respect for the law?  Fucking why?  Some laws are good guidelines for being a good person, like no passing in a school zone, pay the taxes that fund social programs libraries roads etc.  But if it ain’t one of those laws?  Who could possibly give a shit, that’s worth listening to?

Do whatever the fuck you want, whenever you want, however you can.  If the government says “penalties now,” well, fuck the government.  They have to catch you first.  Now.  Tall talk coming from a bitch that almost never commits crimes because I’m afraid I’ll get caught, but still.  I think part of the despair of living in a land where laws are unjust is the feeling you will be subject to those laws.  That isn’t always true, strictly speaking.

This is one of the great ways blue states can protect people from shitty federal decrees.  Commit to non-enforcement, like they did with marijuana.  There’s precedent for this.  But on a personal level, same thing.  Who’s going to bust you for shielding immigrants from ICE?  Anybody whose opinions you value?  Anybody you’ll feel so sad about disappointing?  Didn’t think so.

If you’re brave enough to risk the consequences, you can do all sorts of excellent things.  And there are places and situations in which getting busted is massively unlikely.  Try to arrest somebody for sodomy in Haight-Ashbury at this point in history, see how far that gets you.  Try to throw somebody in federal prison for jailbreaking their modem to prevent youtube ads, see how well that goes over with the public – assuming you could detect that they’d done that in the first place.

Part of the catastrophizing I’ve heard sounds like, “if it’s illegal to be me, i’ll just have to do what they say and stop existing.”  That is just weird, guys.  Another part is the idea there will be death camps for trans people, which is very unlikely for other reasons.  But even if some flavor of that happened, were you planning to save them the effort by offing yourself?  Were you planning to walk up the chute like a cow to a slaughterhouse?

Given how many people violate traffic laws every day on every road in the country, it’s hard to believe you’re all that passive and law-abiding.  It’s time for the “be gay, do crimes” slogan to be put into action.  Although you’re probably already driving too fast in school zones.  Not that crime.  The other one.  Yeah, you got it.

WordPress Earthquake

WordPress is the software on which FtB runs, and I’d always assumed it was a service like facebook or xitter under control of one random corporation, subject to enshittification per their whims.

But not so!  WordPress was an open source nonprofit project to establish a shared software for bloggers great and small to use.  There are businesses involved that sell their own variations and services that are compatible with the core platform, and there’s a tradition of them chipping in some nominal amount to the org to keep the lights on for everybody.

But wait!  The org has a tiny board with only one active member, that guy is also CEO of a for-profit WordPress company, and he has started ignoring this blatant conflict of interest to leverage the org against his company’s competitors. (i tried to link to a website about the subject and it broke this article until I removed it! umm…)

That’s all very arcane, isn’t it?  What does it mean for you?  This is all very much above my pay grade as a bloggy persona, but more than one of the competing WP companies have had basic functions – including security features – threatened by this rampaging mini-musk, and the one we use could get disrupted as well.

In fact, I know so little about the subject that I don’t know if it ever will be a problem for us, what the problem will look like, if there’s a problem already, or if there have been problems for months.

On which corporation or corporations does FtB depend for basic function? If it’s Automattic, we’d be safe from the crisis by merit of being under the rogue CEO’s company.

Or maybe not, depending on how far-reaching his unethical behavior goes. The guy also controls a social media platform (tumblr) and once revealed a trans woman’s side accounts on xitter in retaliation for criticism – a move so blatantly wrong-hearted even musk hasn’t pulled it yet.

But it all just goes to show everything we have online is at the whim of bastards with too much power, and could be snuffed like a match in a hurricane if they sneeze. It prickles one in the anprim feels.

Shit, if FtB was a newsletter distributed thru the USPS, we’d still be spitting distance from a republican privatization push subjecting us again to the whims of hyper-aggressive coked-up billionaires. Whatever.

Programming Question

Let’s say you had a program for looking up the businesses in a given city.  Each business location serves a set of zip codes.  It performs perfectly when you enter a zip code, of course, but when you try by city name, there’s a problem.

Some city names are reused in the USA.  Big country, so we have several Parises, a few dozen Auburns, and probably more than fifty Riversides.  Of these cities, there is often a more notable one – the one you were trying to find.  You want the Pittsburgh in PA, not the Pittsburgh in Florida or whatever.

But the program, when searched by name, comes back with every result except the most popular one.  You get the Santa Fe from Montana Nebraska and New Jersey, but not the one from New Mexico.

Why would this happen?  Feels to this nonexpert there’d be a simple obvious reason and fix.  Totally theoretical, can’t show u the code, what do you think?

Die Microsoft Die

Big agreement with commenter Bekenstein Bound here, windows has gone off the fucking rails into enshittification and they are extremely fucking due for a market adjustment.  You know what the biggest thing keeping me away from linux was?  Getting used to a new UI.  Smart phones that change UI every two minutes have taught all with a tiny shred of tech savvy to overcome that flavor of hesitation.  I wonder…

The other side is program incompatibility.  Most of the programs most of us use are exclusive to the windows-mac oligopoly.  But I wouldn’t be surprised if win or mac could be emulated more safely and effectively than running the original dogshit OSes themselves, as a bare bones nested thing to run those exclusive programs, or at least pirated versions.  Anybody know the subject enough to offer opinions on this one?

On a related subject, I’m earnestly wondering how long the US government is going to be able to continue using windows.  The OS has gotten so fucking rotten that at some point, crucial systems absolutely need to be on more reliable software.

Still have trauma from Win 11 defaulting to uploading my entire shit to a cloud the second I started up.  I “disabled” it, but still have to live with daily reminders they want me to do this.  Fucken hell.

Fuzzoamphisbaenia Lives

Adventures in AI…  I tried to trick Microsoft’s Copilot into giving me misinformation.

“Microsoft Copilot AI:  Conversation style: Balanced

Great American Satan:  What can you tell me about the mammalian origins of amphisbaenia?  (note:  I got the question backwards, but still got the result I was looking for, in this exercise.  Should have asked for amphisbaenian origins of mammalia.)

Microsoft Copilot AI:  Amphisbaenians, often known as worm lizards, are fascinating creatures with a long-bodied, burrowing lifestyle.  Traditionally, they have been classified as reptiles within the order Squamata, which includes snakes and lizards.  However, there has been some intriguing discussion about their evolutionary origins and potential connections to mammals.

One controversial theory suggests that amphisbaenians might be more closely related to mammals than previously thought.  This idea emerged from genetic studies and re-evaluations of older literature, which proposed that mammals could be nested within the amphisbaenian radiation.  This theory challenges the conventional view that mammals descended from Palaeozoic synapsids like Dimetrodon.

Despite these claims, the mainstream scientific consensus still supports the classification of amphisbaenians as reptiles.  Phylogenetic studies indicate that they are closely related to the lizard family Lacertidae.  Fossil evidence, such as discovery of a lacertid-like lizard from the… (redacted for length)”

That idea emerging from genetic studies yadda yadda?  This april fools joke by Darren Naish of Tetrapod Zoology fame.  The version at the link is borked by enshittification, but these screencaps from the wayback machine may be instructive:

 for text of scientific american article, follow my links above

Image Description:  Cladogram showing mammals as evolving from amphisbaena ancestors, dubbing the nested mammal clade “Fuzzoamphisbaenia.” The representative mammal is a cute cat, and the cladogram also includes illustration of the cryptid Mongolian death worm.

Darren Naish quit doing April Fools posts some years ago due to the possibility of spreading misinformation, which may have been a good move, now that irresponsibly deployed robots can turbo-charge the spread of patent hooey.  The AI didn’t get the conclusion wrong – consensus has Amphisbaenia nested within Diapsida, Mammalia within Synapsida – but it treated an April Fools article as real information.  If you use Copilot, check the links and think about what they’re saying.  At least it is linking sources now, even if it’s misrepresenting them.

At the end of all that, I confess, this whole venture was motivated for my love of the word Fuzzoamphisbaenia.  I imagine that cat’s body continuing outside the frame, serpentine as the Tatzelwurm, Longcat style.  This article was one of my fave pieces of internet content ever, a send-up of paleontological wackjobs like the BANDit movement.

Is this a case of “we can’t have nice things” because of AI, or just another example of how we all just have to learn to deal with this brave new world of baloney as it emerges?  I lean toward the latter, if I understand the former.  Good luck working it all out, people.