Update

I know you are on tenterhooks, wondering about my mom. Mostly, I just wrote that because I love the word “tenterhooks”, and feel that one should use it whenever possible. But there is an update, and it is good news. For those of you not praying for her, or for those of you who (like F(entropy)) are thinking kind thoughts about her despite my post… Not only is she surpassing the “dreaded worst-case scenario”, but she is at this point beating the “steely-eyed statistical average”, and is well into the “damn, that’s impressive” territory.

So on the off chance you were worrying, there are other things to worry about.

But if you think that gets you off the blood donation hook, think again.

Headline Muse, 8/23

It was more than the locals could take
As their neighborhoods started to shake
But still worse were the smirks
From the West-Coaster jerks
With their constant “You call that a quake?”

Headline: 5.8 Magnitude Earthquake Rattles East Coast

No, I didn’t feel it. But I’ve felt larger quakes on softer ground, while in Greece. Very disconcerting. I’m very glad it looks like damage was minimal. Let us all give thanks… to architects, engineers, builders, and all those who helped others today, even if that help was just calming them down.

In Lieu Of Doing Nothing

So Cuttlemom (who has, of course, no idea that this blog exists, let alone that her son writes it) had roughly eight hours of surgery yesterday. It was needed, and it went well, and because I am a cuttlefish, that’s about all I’m going to say about it. Except. Cuttlesis (again, no idea of…) has been in charge of keeping everyone informed, and the long list of family and friends shows that this is a good and a necessary thing. Being Cuttlesis, she ends her emails by thanking everyone for their continued prayers.

At least three of the families on the list are atheist, I know. Many are devout bible-thumping christians, yes, but she knows that these three families have just heard “oh, this message doesn’t really apply to you.” It’s not a big deal, just yet one more example of privilege; when you are in the majority, you don’t have to think about what the minority thinks.

Anyway, though. I won’t ask for your kind thoughts toward my mother; you don’t know her, and there’s nothing those thoughts could do to help. What I will ask, though, is that the next chance you get, take a friend to a blood drive with you. If you can’t donate… take two friends.

I’ve said this before, and usually a small handful of people report back that they have done so. But really, if only one unit of blood gets donated, it’s got prayer beat.

On that note, one from the old place:


image thanks to PZ, who thanks Brian Flemming, who thanks Maria.
Let’s fold our hands and bow our heads
And mumble something low,
Or pray to tens of millions on
Some television show.
Let’s take a silent moment, and
Have others do the same,
So those remaining talking can
Be sure to feel their shame.
Let’s know that we are better, cos
We spent our time in prayer,
Than atheists and heathens who
Are working over there.
Let’s say a prayer for Washington,
For Darfur; for Tibet;
Let’s say a prayer for hunger, and
To fix the nation’s debt.
Let’s say a prayer for miners, trapped
In tunnels underground;
Let’s say a prayer for missing kids
In hopes that they are found.
Let’s say a prayer for polar ice
And students gone berserk;
Let’s say a prayer for everything–
It sure beats doing work.

Understanding Fail

Via the Digital International Atheists Group (@DIAGroup on twitter), a letter from Don Boys. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time until PZ posts it in comic sans, but I’m going to use it here as a reason to post an old favorite.

First, the letter:

Tell us that you do or do not believe the unsupportable, even outrageous teaching that nothing created everything. I promise not to laugh out loud–maybe only a snicker or two. And don’t try to flimflam us common people with scientific jargon, but make your points in clear English.

Tell us how all the scientific laws evolved such as gravity, inertia, the First and Second Laws, laws of planetary motion, etc. How does a scientific law evolve? If they did not evolve, where did they come from?

Did the evolution of those laws precede or follow the Big Bang?

Can you provide any example of an explosion resulting in order?

Tell us how life first formed on this planet made up entirely of rock? All atheists want to sit down beside

Darwin’s warm little pond and watch the first forms of life, but I demand to know much more than that if I’m expected to consider the idea has any possibility.

Do you, or do you not, believe in spontaneous generation? No honest scientist will agree to that fable.

Where are the ancestors of insects?

Why are meteorites not found in ancient rocks? Could it be that the rocks are not ancient?

Tell us how men and women evolved at the same time in history at the same location? What if “early man” had been all male!

Which evolved first, the mouth, the stomach, the digestive system or the elimination system? What good is a mouth if there is no stomach or a digestive system and what good are the three without an elimination system?

Tell us why we are here and where we go when death finally comes for us? Why have people all over the Earth since the beginning of time been concerned with that concept?

What happens if you are wrong and I am right? After all, any real scholar will admit that possibility.

Since the God of the Bible is real and eternity is in everyone’s future, don’t you think it might be wise and safe to consider this issue more carefully? If it is only possible that there is a sovereign, all-powerful God out there, then that is the most staggering truth ever faced by any mortal, and that truth will affect every person on the face of the Earth.

Is atheism really worth the risk? Eternity is a long time to be wrong. If I am wrong about eternity then it costs me nothing, but if atheists are wrong, they have lost everything, including their souls.

If you think there is not a word there that hasn’t been tried before and found wanting, you’d be right. Ignorance, more ignorance, and yet more ignorance, with Pascal’s Wager as the cherry on top.

My favorite, though, is the bit about men and women evolving separately. It gives me such a warm feeling inside to know that there are people out there so intent on not understanding. Oh, and it gives me the chance to tell you the story of Lonely Percy.

Percy would wander for years at a time;
He was terribly sad and incredibly lonely—
Percy was looking for love, but too bad;
The world had, so far, evolved male creatures only.

Percy was restless, and anxiously watching,
He knew what he wanted; he wanted a wife.
(Although, since the female had not yet evolved,
He had never seen women in all of his life!)

For long generations, his forefathers sought
For some womanly tenderness, softness, and mercy,
But cold evolution denied them their wish;
Now the burden was borne by poor, motherless Percy.

From Grand-dad to Father, from Father to Son,
Generations would pass, without calling for sex.
I haven’t a clue how they managed to do it;
The method, it seems, is a little complex.

Percy has walked tens of thousands of miles
In search of a hopeful mutation or two.
You see, he has parts that he thinks may be useful,
Which haven’t, as yet, had a damned thing to do.

Far away, on the shores of a vast, distant ocean,
A small population is camped by the water,
Where all by themselves, they just sit there evolving,
Granny to Mother, and Mother to Daughter.

Someday, perhaps, as he wanders and wanders,
Percy could find, with a great deal of luck,
He may stumble upon this remote population,
And finally end up with someone to love.

Headline Muse, 8/22

They had gone to Hawaii to marry
Cos the laws, among states, tend to vary
By death they’re now parted
So lawyers get started—
Without equal rights, it gets scary.

Headline: Indiana stage collapse lawsuits could challenge state’s rules on gay marriage

It’s hard enough to sue for damages after an event like the Indiana stage collapse. An earlier story drew comments about vulture lawyers, greedy survivors, and cold-hearted people all around. But for Beth Urschel, there is insult added to injury; Indiana does not recognize her Hawaiian civil union. What would be a frustrating situation for anyone (the Indiana State Fair has a liability limitation such that their total payouts are capped at a fraction of what victims are currently seeking) will likely turn into a legal nightmare, ending at the Indiana supreme court, at minimum.

Turns Out, Rick Perry Loves Science After All

Governor Perry’s reliance on science
Seems counter-intuitive, don’t you agree?
He’s oftener known for denying, or lying,
To hold the positions his base wants to see
His stances on, say, evolution, pollution,
Or greenhouse effects of traditional fuels,
He quickly, as soon as he spies them, denies them,
So “science is wrong” appears one of his rules

But now he has “eggheads” controlling his polling
And visits to rallies that might make the news
His skeptical take on campaigning is gaining
Advantages over traditional views
With randomized campaign conditions, their mission’s
To optimize use of his money and time
It’s science that gives the most power per hour
It’s science that gives the most impact per dime.

From the New York Times’ “The Caucus” blog, a preview of an upcoming book: The Victory Lab. Turns out Rick Perry loves science–experimental social psychology, though, not evolutionary biology or climate science. The “soft” sciences are where he can see the power of the scientific method, and his opponents need to pay attention now.

The good news (from my perspective): Obama has been on board with scientific approaches to campaigning for some time now. His advisors include behavioral economists, including some big names from within experimental social psychology (Robert Cialdini’s book, “Influence“, is a classic in the psychology of attitude change and persuasion, for instance).

The bad news (again, my perspective): Perry’s team appears to be the only one actually applying experimental control to his on-the-ground campaign events. It is one thing to know that the literature predicts X, Y, and Z, and to make campaign recommendations based on that literature; it is quite another to test your own campaign (through random assignment and control of variables) to be certain that the literature (often experiments on undergrads) applies to your own populations (less likely to be undergrads).

So, yeah, Rick Perry loves science. He knows it works. He has seen its power, and has put it to his own uses. And he is applying it directly, not abstractly, which makes a very real difference–I can’t emphasize enough, general findings may not apply to any given subset of the population. It is important to test the actual operations on actual populations. Rick Perry (or his people) know this, and the rest of us ignore it at our peril.

Headline Muse, 8/21

He’s captured; he’s cornered; he’s fled
He’s packing, surrendered, or dead
I’m skipping the headlines—
No journalist deadlines—
I’ll read it on Twitter instead

Headline: Rebels Close In On Libyan Capital

The real story is that news organizations are, as they were with the death of Bin Laden, clearly a second or third in the race to report. Of course, Twitter is more of a rumor-storm than a news outlet; CNN half an hour behind, but are they using that time to be more certain?

Just Another Case Study

As an appropriate accompaniment to my earlier post today, I thought I’d reach way back in the archives–so far back that this verse actually predates my old blog. Indeed, it was the reaction to this one that led me to start collecting them at the old place. It refers to the unfortunate demise of Gary Aldridge, example number kajillion-and-one of repressed sexuality. If you don’t recall the case, take a moment to look at the link; the verse presupposes some knowledge of the particulars.

We gather here to eulogize
The Pastor and the Man
Old Gary Aldridge, often wise,
Though not his latest plan.

A member of the Christian nation,
Friend of Jerry Falwell,
His last attempt at masturbation
Didn’t go at all well.

For fifteen years, he’d preached the word
A Southern Baptist minister
His death–now, is it just absurd
Or something rather sinister?

How does a person come to wear
Not one wetsuit, but two?
(Although, I know, I should not care
I’m curious–aren’t you?)

I tend to think that, years ago,
He spied a rubber glove,
And wondered “Should I–well, you know–
When God and I make love?”

He tried it on, and found a tube,
Half hidden on his shelf,
Of KY–smiled, and murmered “Lube
Thy neighbor as thy self.”

And minutes later, hard at work,
He felt a little odd
Was this a sin, or just a quirk?
He talked it out with God.

“Is what I’m doing here a sin?
Or is my pleasure Thine?
Is this as bad as skin on skin?
Lord, please, give me a sign!”

So God produced a pamphlet: “Your
Vacation in Aruba!”
And pointed out–right there, page four–
The wetsuits used for SCUBA

See, God’s not really how you think
A deity might be
He’s got a wicked bondage kink
(Just ask His son, J. C.)

So Gary died, not steeped in sin
But following God’s plan;
So straight to Heaven–come on in!
And bring the wetsuits, man!

A story, sure, but it may yet
Explain what happened then.
The moral is, please don’t forget:
Your safeword is “Amen”.

And On The Eighth Day, God Created Porn

God made sex and God made pleasure
God made love, and God made lust
These are God’s most precious treasures—
These fill God with pure disgust.

God made tongues, and God made fingers
God made hair, and God made skin
If by chance your touch should linger
You’ve just committed mortal sin.

God made our imagination
And may have made it all too well
God made man love masturbation
Then used it as a path to hell

It must be Sunday; CNN’s Belief Blog has a long article up. This one is on christian counseling programs to overcome pornography addiction.

Though controversial in secular circles, much of the evangelical Christian world has been cheering this relatively new kind of therapy. Many believers, including many Christian leaders, consider it a powerful tool for fighting what they say is one of the modern church’s biggest problems: porn addiction.

It is, as I said, a long article, covering new approaches, criticisms, the online “xxxchurch” mission, and more.

It’s interesting; while [some, fundamentalist] christians [like, say, most of the GOP presidential candidates] love to give god, and not evolution, credit for human nature, when that human nature includes lust, porn-viewing and masturbation, that can’t possibly be god’s work. Whether Satan or evolution, turns out omnipotence isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.

Headline Muse, 8/20

Through a highly unusual plea
A new world, for the West Memphis Three
The deal that was built
Meant admitting to guilt—
Would you say that you killed, to go free?

Headline: Deal Frees ‘West Memphis Three’ in Arkansas

The more I read about this, the more interesting it gets. Though officially all three have now confessed, they very publicly maintain their innocence, noting that confession was necessary in order to gain release. In the case of one of the men, release means from death row. And many writers make the case that the evidence against them was slim and disappearing, that their case was likely to be reviewed and probably overturned.

I don’t claim omniscience. I don’t know their guilt or innocence for a fact, and cannot. But it is an interesting exercise to put myself in the position of the various players in this. Could I confess to a crime I did not do, to save myself? To save a friend? Could I, knowing they might soon be proven innocent, offer a plea bargain wherein inmates must confess to murder in order to save a friend?