Headline Muse, 11/3

This is not something simple, that passes
While we all sit around on our asses
It’s a “monster” increase—
We’re refusing to cease
Our production of more greenhouse gases

Headline: “Monster” greenhouse gas levels seen

The opening says it all:

The global output of heat-trapping carbon dioxide jumped by the biggest amount on record, the U.S. Department of Energy calculated, a sign of how feeble the world’s efforts are at slowing man-made global warming.
The new figures for 2010 mean that levels of greenhouse gases are higher than the worst case scenario outlined by climate experts just four years ago.

This is terribly disappointing news. We are all so screwed.

Let The Finger-Pointing Begin!

Cain blames Perry
Perry Blames Mitt
Mitt gets cautious–
Don’t say shit.
Who told stories?
Cain don’t know.
Bring the popcorn;
Start the show!

Whenever two or more of you are gathered in His name
The odds will rise, the exercise is one of laying blame.

Cain backed off from initial claims that Perry was behind the accusations of sexual harassment. Perry’s people now hint strongly that Romney’s people are behind it.

Just in time; with All My Children off the air, I needed my daily stories.

How To Combat Atheism On Campus.

I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around a page I just found, on a site called “busted halo” (it’s for “spiritual seekers”). See, Cuttlefish University has, I think, 6 Christian student groups, two Jewish student groups, and an interfaith group. No atheist groups, freethinkers, secularists… So the question at the page puzzled me: “What’s the best way to combat atheism on a college campus?” (more after jump:) [Read more…]

To Phrase A Coin

The motto is “In God We Trust”;
Display it everywhere, we must!
In doing so, recall, it’s just
A hollow little phrase.
It’s on our money, even though
It lost religion long ago—
Rote repetition made it so
It’s meaningless these days.

If you’re like me, you find it odd
That those who claim to love their god
Would fight to keep this cheap façade,
Especially on money!
But now, in congress, start the fight
To grow the phrase in public sight—
Replacing God with new “God lite”
You must admit, it’s funny

Remember Teddy Roosevelt
Opposed the motto, cos he felt
It sacrilege to put on gelt,
Insulting the creator
But that was then, and this is now;
We’ll push our god; we don’t care how,
With every method we allow.
And jobs? Well, maybe later.

Rant, after jump: [Read more…]

Edible? Wearable?

An octopus, in all its glory,
Draped about a dress of nori,
Decorates a model in a German fashion show
Chocolate wraps, and masks of fishes
Are these clothes, or are they dishes?
Edible aesthetics for the woman on the go?

From the drawing-board and kettle
Of the Michelin chef Trettl
It was mostly eaten afterwards (not all of it, I note)
Now this fashion-slash-nutrition
Is a photo exhibition
As couture or as cuisine, though, I’m left wondering… is it haute?

More after jump: [Read more…]

I’m Offended!

I’m offended! Yes, offended! And I want this practice ended!
But it’s not because I simply took offense!
Your pretense is, my offense is what’s been bothering my senses
And the truth is, your confusion is immense!
I’ve detected, you’ve neglected to reveal my view’s protected
By the first amendment of our constitution!
In conclusion, your illusion of my motives is delusion!
But I’m sure it fits your sense of persecution.

Rant, after jump: [Read more…]

The Mermaid In The Hudson

This beautiful site linked to my “eating mermaid” verse today. As a result, I’ve just spent an indeterminable amount of time reading the whole thing–well, up to the present. It updates three times a week, and I can tell I will be wearing out a path to its door. The link up there goes to the first page; follow it. You will find a literal mermaid and one or more figurative cuttlefish, hiding in their ink.

It also looks like they have an entire community commenting, but if I dive in there, I’ll likely never be seen again.

Do me a favor. Don’t sing for me. Don’t tell me you all already knew about this gem, but didn’t tell me. Let me think it was my own discovery. A year or so after I might have.

The Church’s Last Taboo

We’ll talk about race and we’ll talk about sex,
Execution, abortion, divorce
Share power with women, admit open gays,
Make political choices, of course
We’re toppling taboos; we’re changing our ways
The choices we make, though, are funny—
The issue that none of us dare speak its name…
The final taboo… why, it’s money

Goodies, after the jump:
[Read more…]

Headline Muse, 10/31

Tom Keith was a master of sound
What he did with his voice would astound
Now I’m empty inside
Cos I hear that he’s died
And his equal may never be found.

Headline: Tom Keith, ‘A Prairie Home Companion’s’ Sound Guy, Has Died

Tom Keith was amazing. I listened to PHC just to hear what he could do. See, the thing is, I do that too. In my classes. I provide all the sound effects to my stories–I thought everybody did, but in observing other teachers, I find this not to be the case.

Some people have their little dreams of playing catch with their sports hero, or acting with their favorite star, or hanging out with Stephen Hawking. Me, I wanted a guest gig on PHC, dueling sound effects with Tom Keith.

Gotta scratch that one off the list, unaccomplished.

Homeopathic Science

It’s a wholly different system–
There are data, but you missed ’em,
In the infinite dilution of our minds!
Modern medicine is bleaker
Cos our evidence is weaker,
Which is stronger, as our different system finds!

All those articles and studies
That you put out with your buddies,
Which you think will make your evidence more strong?
It is our determination
Through our less-is-more translation,
Each one proves that Western Medicine is wrong!

While you losers have fun losing
We’re diluting and succusing,
Gaining power modern science can’t assess–
And our strongest contribution
May be found in this solution:
Common sense (at just one molecule, or less)!

Strange. When I wrote this last year, PZ was complaining about homeopaths on his campus. Some things never change.