Headline Muse, 11/15

From their gilded and silk-cushioned heights
Where their privilege has suffered some slights
The bishops are whining
“The laws are confining!”
They’ve vowing to fight for their rights

Headline: Bishops Renew Fight on Abortion and Gay Marriage

Heh. This headline has two daddies names–the “fight on abortion and gay marriage” one, and the far more catholic-friendly “Bishops Open ‘Religious Liberty’ Drive”. Same article, two headlines. The bishops are trying to reframe bigotry as “religious liberty”. The commenters are having none of it, which is nice. Yeah there are the occasional “the church is doing the right thing, fighting immorality”, but these are few and far between. In the New York Times comments, at least, the church has lost the high ground.

Headline Muse, 11/9

It’s the smallest one ever—by far!
And its structure (to me) looks bizarre
There was nowhere to park
And so, just as a lark,
They made a molecular car!

Headline: Single-molecule ‘electric car’ taken for test drive

(Very cool illustration at link)

Ok, nanotechnology may be the key to fitting more cars into the same parking lot, but a single-molecule car is not going to be helpful for carpooling. I think I’ll stick to my bike.

Headline Muse, 11/6

Though the thought, I am sure, left them weary
Google answered the government’s query
Though they couldn’t tell yet,
There’s a very real threat
In the form of the audible “Siri”

Headline: Schmidt sees Siri as a ‘threat’ to Google’s search business

My dumb phone is already smarter than I am; I doubt I will have a smart phone until the cool kids are getting an even newer model implanted into the bones of their skulls.

Headline Muse, 11/4

Though her story remains just the same
There’s a candidate shirking the blame
He’ll dismiss it because,
Though she’s breaking no laws,
His accuser will not tell her name

Headline: Herman Cain accuser stands by complaint, won’t go public

Why should we listen to someone who won’t even admit her identity? Hmm… why do we insist that a woman open herself up to public excoriation before we take her seriously? Cain’s accuser is already on record; there is no reason to think that knowing her identity adds anything to the accusations.

Headline Muse, 11/3

This is not something simple, that passes
While we all sit around on our asses
It’s a “monster” increase—
We’re refusing to cease
Our production of more greenhouse gases

Headline: “Monster” greenhouse gas levels seen

The opening says it all:

The global output of heat-trapping carbon dioxide jumped by the biggest amount on record, the U.S. Department of Energy calculated, a sign of how feeble the world’s efforts are at slowing man-made global warming.
The new figures for 2010 mean that levels of greenhouse gases are higher than the worst case scenario outlined by climate experts just four years ago.

This is terribly disappointing news. We are all so screwed.

Headline Muse, 10/31

Tom Keith was a master of sound
What he did with his voice would astound
Now I’m empty inside
Cos I hear that he’s died
And his equal may never be found.

Headline: Tom Keith, ‘A Prairie Home Companion’s’ Sound Guy, Has Died

Tom Keith was amazing. I listened to PHC just to hear what he could do. See, the thing is, I do that too. In my classes. I provide all the sound effects to my stories–I thought everybody did, but in observing other teachers, I find this not to be the case.

Some people have their little dreams of playing catch with their sports hero, or acting with their favorite star, or hanging out with Stephen Hawking. Me, I wanted a guest gig on PHC, dueling sound effects with Tom Keith.

Gotta scratch that one off the list, unaccomplished.

Headline Muse, 10/28

For the Greeks, after weeks, we can say
There are reasons to party today
Which they will, even though
It’s a day to say “NO!”
On this «ΟΧΙ» day, time to say «ναι»

Headline: Ή με τους ήρωες του «ΟΧΙ» ή με τους φαύλους του «ναι σε όλα»

Today is the 71st anniversary of ΟΧΙ day–the day the Greeks refused to surrender to Mussolini. The dictator’s demands were responded to with a single word–ΟΧΙ, or “no”–and “no” has been a part of the national character ever since.

Of course, the sacrifice of those who backed up that “no” is honored mostly by lip service. Just as in the US, sacrifice isn’t what it used to be. Part of the current financial crisis, here and there, comes from being too willing to say “yes”.

Headline Muse, 10/27

See, I don’t want my prices to rise
But it’s worthless if nobody buys
As I calculate cost,
I’m admitting—I’m lost!
What’s the right rate to charge to tell lies?

Headline: This Way to the Séance

A strange story in the Wall Street Journal. Just another profile of a small business owner… in this case, though, the business is talking to the dead lying to people for money. A weekly group, Séance in the City, meets for fun, to test their psychic abilities, to mingle with one another, and to have Jesse Bravo give them a reading.

“I have a gift and I want to share that with as many people as possible without overcharging them. For two hours, it’s less than a movie ticket and popcorn,” Mr. Bravo said.

Which, of course, brings up the question in the limerick: What exactly is overcharging, when your service consists of lying to people?

In real life, he is a money manager and stock picker; he claims not to use his psychic powers to help him on the job. I believe that, of course. I also believe that if they were actually real, that’s pretty much all he’d use them for, and he wouldn’t advertise the fact for less than six figures. After all, he could make a cool million with Randi if he were really out for money. Convenient, then, that he’s so altruistic, meeting these dozen or so people for only $20 a head for the 2 hour session.

Aside from these meetings, life as a psychic can be a lonely gig. Mr. Bravo’s 88,000 Twitter followers and nearly 3,000 Facebook friends are relentless with their questions, but the friendships are one-sided.

“I get a friend invite and then I get a message with a question,” said Mr. Bravo. “I’m a human being, too. I like to chat and be friendly, and not just be used for my abilities.”

Some advice, then; if you want to make real friends, stop lying to them.