I planted a few bamboo by the forging shed, last fall. There were a few days of -4F weather in the winter and the bamboo (supposedly fairly cold hardy) died.
This spring I got some even more cold hardy bamboo, and planted it last week. All 3 of them appear to be doing fine, so they’ll have a whole summer and fall to grow before winter. I shouldn’t have planted the other ones in the fall. But, as I was planting the new bamboos, I noticed that last fall’s weren’t actually dead, either. Small green leaves were appearing on one. The other two, the stalks looked dead enough that I trimmed them down to ground height and nearly pulled them out, entirely. I’m very glad I did not do that.
survivor
But, all three plants were alive under the ground, and have put up shoots. This is a breed of bamboo that grows up to 60′ high and makes dense forests, and – wow! – does it grow fast!
That is 3 weeks’ growth. I cut the old stalk off in order to encourage it to make more stalks. I don’t know if that was the right thing to do but it doesn’t appear to matter – the bamboo has its own ideas.
Apparently these are a nasty, invasive version and some jurisdictions ban people from planting it. In my case, it would take decades for the stuff to grow far enough to reach the borders of my propertly, so it’s just a question of suppressing it within my boundaries. It would be a not-unexpected irony if the state of Pennsylvania tried to prosecute me for planting bamboo, while refusing to do a damn thing to defend my property rights from trespassers.
One of the things I absolutely hate are the many ATV’ers who maraud wherever they want to go. Pennsylvania has lots of rules for how you can mark private property, no hunting, or not ATVs but everyone goes everywhere. The only property lines most Pennsylvanians will enforce are their own. I still occasionally wind up discussing this with some asshat on an ATV who has been tearing up my property, “hey, how would you feel if I come do some loops around your place in my 4×4?” they get all huffy and say they’d shoot anyone who did that. Which is my cue to point to the L1A1 leaning in the passengers’ seat – “So you approve of shooting trespassers, huh? You strike me as a rather stupid person.” Yes, I take a rifle with me when I go to confront hunters and ATV’ers because I have been offered threats on multiple occasions. I don’t like having people threaten me so I want to give them something to think about.
Before you say “call the police” I have, and I do. This is Pennsylvania. The police frequently don’t come. You call and they say “we’ll try to send someone by.” But when they do come they always say “nothing we can do, unless they attack you.” Yeah, that’s great. Out here in Clearfield county there are more ATVs than there are people; no kidding. The hunters are equally bad. Hunting is such a thing out here that some schools let the kids out on the first day of deer season so they can go to Marcus’ property and try to blast a deer. Usually the hunters learn not to come back, once they realize that you are going to ruin their hunt. But there have been times where I’ve had to turn my back and walk to my truck with 3 angry beerful jackasses holding deer rifles at the ready; I’m scared of angry beerful jackasses with guns, who have just had their first day of hunting season ruined.
Sometimes I launch a drone and do a patrol from the air, which completely terrifies all the deer and ruins the hunt for the day. One time an angry hunter started to try to draw a bead on the drone so I took it low and fast and started zigzagging right for him. A drone with carbon fiber propellers sounds like a flying table-saw. Because it is a flying table-saw. The hunters leave pretty quick, once they see the gimballed camera tracking them – they know that they’re on film. I’ve taken pictures of ATV’ers and hunters to the state police barracks and asked them to charge some of these people with trespassing but they basically refuse to do it. One time a cop suggested that if I really cared I should “get to know one of the local DAs and donate to his election campaign because that might get their attention.”
One way I tried to deal with ATVs, a few years ago, was by planting lines of bamboo at the places where they enter and exit the property, and some of the slopes that they particularly like to shred on. Unfortunately, the bamboo was crushed pretty quickly with only a few survivors. One of my plans, if the 60-foot stuff takes off, is to begin transplanting shoots from that. I’ve seen what the big tall bamboo patches are like, and I almost pity the jerk who tries to take a dirtbike through one of those – especially after I trim some at a 45-degree angle with a katana.
It’s tempting to put up wire fences, or nail-strips or things like that, but I’ve been advised (by the state police, no less) to not do things like that because ATV’ers who get a nail in a tire have been known to vandalize properties, in return. Nice, huh? It’s how folks “appreciate nature” out here. In Maryland, nobody would ever ATV on a property marked “No Trespassing” because there would be a lawsuit and damages. I know a guy in New Jersey who owns a farm and some woods and called the police on some ATV’ers and the SWAT team showed up. I have no idea what they do in Texas, but I suspect it’s stupid. But Pennsylvania basically does nothing. Pennsylvania is a typical messed-up US state: you can’t buy beer on sunday (thanks, christians!) but you can buy a gun and the state requires an instant background check – basically, you can’t drink beer but you can buy murder weapons in about the same amount of time it would have taken to buy a beer, if you wanted to.
The fences around the bamboo are to keep the neighbor’s cows (who I allow to graze in the field next to the shop) from eating them like they did the first round I planted. I guess when they get tall enough I’ll put a solar-powered electric fence around them.
So barbed wire is out. How about ditches?
Nothing kills bamboo. Athough as you have discovered cows will totally eat-murder a meal of them, I’m not sure it’s all that good for them. The only sources I have seen supporting this are pro-bamboo.
You are *already* being vandalized, so I am puzzled by that description that they would revenge themselves. They are already bullies damaging your peaceful and private enjoyment of your property.
There are some thorny plants that will ruin them some tires real good, although I know about most of these because California is desert-adjacent. I’ve seen on Amazing Race some African plants that look totally harmless that will mess your tires up real good. If you find any that will grow in the cold and the wet, plant them beside the routes the vandals take instead of directly in their way. The path they take will become narrower and narrower as they learn their lesson or don’t and lose tires.
Himalayan Blackberry.
Invasive, nigh indestructible, grows in temperate climates, and provides delicious fruit in the summer.
Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden@#3:
Himalayan Blackberry
OMG I have had run-ins with those before! (on horseback, no less) They are from hell.
Turns out that legitimate sources don’t seem to sell them, though of course there is one seller on ebay. I think that a few berry patches at the places they transition through will be great. I wonder if I can eventually plant some bamboo in there as well. But mostly I want the bastards to shred themselves.
seachange@#2:
You are *already* being vandalized, so I am puzzled by that description that they would revenge themselves. They are already bullies damaging your peaceful and private enjoyment of your property.
They see it as “the old trail we have been riding on forever” and an attempt to change that is a reduction of their privileges.So, yeah, I have to worry about windows getting smashed or shots being fired through my house, or fires, or stuff like that. I’ve had hunters ask me “do you want a hunting accident?” It’s a pretty typical manifestation of how white privilege reacts to being balked.
I’d be tempted to start collecting license plates, names, addresses, etc. Just to have that information around in case an opportunity comes along. There’s nothing illegal about collecting security footage of trespassers, nor to try to track and identify them. After all, you might just be preparing for a law suit. You need to know who to sue.
The fact that it also means you can keep an eye out for chances to fuck them over is entirely incidental.
Hooray for the bamboo making it! That’s great, and wow, look how tall that is already!
You could try black locust. https://smallfarms.cornell.edu/2018/01/black-locust/ We have this all over the place and “robust” is certainly one way to describe the thorns. If you get stabbed by one – pretty much inevitable if you try and go through a stand of them – it will *always* get infected. I have yet to find the boot sole they will not penetrate. One year some people stopped by the side of the road to gather some when they were in flower (actually a beautiful sight) and when I went to warn them, it was too late – they were already thoroughly stabbed. No doubt they spent an unpleasant week with festering sores.
The thing of it is, they are actually a beautiful tree and very useful. You should be careful; you might accidentally get seeds in something, some day.
LykeX@#6:
The fact that it also means you can keep an eye out for chances to fuck them over is entirely incidental.
Another suggestion that has been made is to collect evidence, then sue for damage to my property in small claims court. The cap on that is $12,000 but that’s actually pretty reasonable, IMO.
The land we’re talking about is old strip-mine tailings that I am trying to let grow back to be forest. So when the ATV’ers come through, they are destroying saplings and kicking dirt down the slopes, causing erosion, etc – and they also go down into my hay fields. Damage would be easy to establish, I could put a drone up and collect video of the kind of wreckage the ATVs cause to the slopes. They really do mess things up. After a few kids bankrupt their parents word of it will get around.
I always wondered how in the heck it became my problem that the idiot parents bought expensive toys for their kids — without also having enough land for them to use them. “But where are they supposed to ride?” Maybe think about that before you buy the things?
In my case a tornado came through and knocked down enough large trees to completely block the access they would use to trespass, it will be impassible for the rest of my lifetime — peace at last.
… it would take decades for the stuff to grow far enough to reach the borders of my propertly…
Either you have a very large spread or a small grasp of geometrical growth rates.
I picture you in your elder years, struggling with the choice between herds of goats or bulldozer-mounted flamethrowers. But by then Pennsylvania may have warmed enough that you can plant kudzu, and enjoy your own backyard botanical Kong-vs-Godzilla battle.
First off I would look up what the rules are for NO TRESPASS signs is around here every 50′ is required. Mark the property line and a second line in a bit. Second I would set up a shooting range, all legal and such, on their favored slopes. Round here any property more than two acres is legal to shoot on. Mark it with danger signs and mention live ammunition in use. Odds are lots of those boys favor camouflage clothing so shooting near them is simply explained that you didn’t see them and, because you’re getting old, didn’t hear the engines. Spend some time setting up targets and shooting. The noise messes with their hunt and even ATV riders can see the inconsistency in casually motoring past shot up targets.
Just a thought. Good luck.
Paint up some “Achtung Minen” signs and plant them along the property line, then have a loud conversation with your friend at the local store (where everyone can hear) about how you got a great deal on Ebay on a case load of Bouncing Betties.
For extra effect go into great detail on what a Bouncing Betty does to a young mans lower extremities…
Seriously though, Lorn’s idea of a shooting range is a good one.
Now I’m thinking about low-key, plausible-deniability vehicle obstacles/traps that would hopefully tread that fine-line twixt making your property undesireable for ATVrs, but not incite further property damage or acts of violence.
When I was enlisted, we had to spend a lot of time cleaning up various live-fire ranges in the desert, and a big thing was for us to clean up old com wire. I’m not even sure I would recognize it now, but it was just cheap insulated wire, that you could run a spool twixt two different positions, and use for communications equipment. or something. I dunno, I was a machine gunner, I didn’t deal with that stuff. But, apparently, there were claims that it would get tangled up in the axels of vehicles, enough that it could supposedly slow the vehicle down, or even damage the engine/mechanical stuff. Also, we were told that this is supposedly where the term “wrapped around the axle” came from. Then again, we were told a lot of bullshit, and I never spoke to a vehicle driver who had this actually happen to them.
Maybe fill some of the low-lying areas in there paths/routes with some sort of really sticky mud? (kaolinite? drilling mud?) maybe that would only work for bigger vehicles.
start dumping all your waste glass containers at certain points?
do some strategic tree felling?
I imagine your small-claims court idea probably has the most potential, but it’s going to take time, both for the suits to get settled, and for word to get around and the idea to sink in.
Drunk hunters… I know it’s a thing, I grew up in rural PA, but if anything should be illegal, it should be carrying and using a firearm under the influence…
Long ago I did some summer work for a rancher, including repairing a section of barb wire fence. He had a lot of trouble with trespassers, especially hunters and poachers. They would cut fence wires to drive through, which could cause serious losses if his cattle escaped.
He came up with a defensive tactic which I helped install. At the points where they usually entered his land we buried boards with projecting nails in shallow trenches, directly beneath the fenceline. We disguised the nail points with grass and leaves. A trespasser stood a good chance of ruining all four tires if they cut that fence.
Did it work? I never checked back with the rancher, and he is long gone now. Another story about the same rancher: once a couple of yahoos got seriously bogged in the mud on his land. He very kindly used his tractor to extricate their truck and then invited them into his house to warm up and dry off. While they did so, he called the sheriff who came and arrested them for trespassing and damaging his land.
Marcus, can you mount a sound system on the drones?
Ride of the Valkyries played at 11 might be fun.
Rewilding: Four tips to let nature thrive
This may not be relevant, since bamboo in Pennsylvania is arguably not “natural”.
Tip #4: “Don’t alienate rural communities”
Nope. This is not the article you are looking for.
I have Himalayan blackberry clippings and black locust seeds on the way, courtesy of ebay. I’ll be reporting on how those things fare. It occurs to me that if I do a planting then I am justified in putting up an electric fence around it to keep the deer away. One of the things that terrifies sensible ATV’ers is steel wire fencing. But a property owner is taking their life in their hand, out here, if they string up wire with the appearance of trying to, you know, cause neck-height intersections with a dirt biker. I’m pretty reluctant to go there because one of the guys I hung out with in college was a dirt rider who used to beat the crap out of anyone he saw putting up fences. I do not want any Hatfields and McCoys Appalacian Death Grudge(tm) going on around my property.
As I said earlier – I have had experience with Himalayan blackberry (did not know what it’s called) and I’d possibly rather run into an electric fence than that stuff. An electric fence won’t shred you, and the canes of the blackberries are, when fresh, much much less breakable than an ATV’er. I don’t know if I’ll be able to close paths but if I can grow incredibly spiky natural barrier on either side of the path, they’ll encroach and anyone who doesn’t realize what they’re riding into will have a really nasty experience. And I love blackberries!
Black locust is gorgeous wood when turned on a lathe, blackberries make good jam, and if I find any ATV’ers caught in the brambles, I believe I am allowed to keep them for medical experiments, under Pennsylvania law. So I’m feeling optimistic about this. I also could plant some bamboo and put steel wire hooked to a battery-solar electric fence and as long as I mark the wire clearly with flags, they can run into that if they want to.
I am imagining that if the blackberries take off, I can let them grow up on either side of the trail and then put a sign up right in the middle of the trail, saying “NO ATVS” – the ATV’ers would then probably keep their speed up and run around the sign by riding into the blackberries. Then I will harvest the corpses and dispose of them, and sell the ATVs.
chigau@#15:
Marcus, can you mount a sound system on the drones?
It’d probably work better if I just had a sound system hanging from the trees. That way I could also get on the mic and tell them there’s an artillery strike inbound. “Please place your wallets and your weapons on the ground, they are forfeit.”
I had already commented but later, while walking the dogs, I remembered a friend down here in Florida had a similar issue with trespassers. After talking to the sheriff’s department numerous times with no success he shifted gears and got better results working with the local conservation people and forest service.
He had about ten acres designated a wildlife refuge area. Had the land redistricted and put up signs. Strictly no hunting or fishing, and no motor vehicles. An exception is made for land management. The forest service was far more responsive and was more respected. Being a wildlife refuge also drastically lowed his property taxes.
If I had been online last week I’d have sent you blackberry shoots for free. They are coming up in my yard and being weeded out on the daily right now.
The house across the street from me used to have an end-stage blackberry forest in the back yard. The elderly folks who had owned the place for decades had not gone into it for … a long time. Years. It turns out the berry vines form a closed canopy with greenery 6-9 feet up and relatively sparse canes. It’s possible to walk through the interior if you have heavy canvas on. It’s the edges of the patch that have far more canes (and also all the berries, especially on the southern exposures).
Numenaster, whose eyes are up here@#20:
The house across the street from me used to have an end-stage blackberry forest in the back yard. The elderly folks who had owned the place for decades had not gone into it for … a long time. Years. It turns out the berry vines form a closed canopy with greenery 6-9 feet up and relatively sparse canes. It’s possible to walk through the interior if you have heavy canvas on. It’s the edges of the patch that have far more canes (and also all the berries, especially on the southern exposures).
Wow!
When I was a kid in the summers in France I had a “fort” that was entirely made of plum trees and brambles. I cut a path into the middle of this huge path, like a maze, then hauled in a reclining beach chair and a bunch of water. I used to sit back there and feed mosquitoes. It’d be cool to go back and see if anything is left of the maze. Left, hook back, right, right, zigzag and then you’re in the middle!
If I had been online last week I’d have sent you blackberry shoots for free. They are coming up in my yard and being weeded out on the daily right now.
Wow, so they do sound pretty invasive. Great!
I have a small hydroponic garden and all the cloning liquids and stuff, so I think I can do this pretty well. If it doesn’t work out I may poke you. From what I have read, it sounds like the bamboo is a little bit harder.