You may have noticed that Tommy Tuberville was holding up military appointments. We now learn what kind of thing he thinks justifies his dilatoriness.
Tuberville responds to the Navy Secretary by saying the Secretary has to get wokeness out of the Navy because “we’ve got people doing poems on aircraft carriers” pic.twitter.com/JiTgCrFb2q
— Acyn (@Acyn) September 6, 2023
Tuberville attempted to defend his monthslong blockade by fighting the culture war on “wokeness.”
“Right now we are so woke in the military, we are losing recruits right and left,” he said. “Secretary [Carlos] Del Toro of the Navy he needs to get to building ships; he needs to get to recruiting; and he needs to get wokeness out of our Navy. We’ve got people doing poems on aircraft carriers over the loudspeaker. It is absolutely insane the direction that we’re headed in our military.”
OH MY GOD. Sailors might hear poetry. Real men don’t read or listen to poetry, or pay any attention to song lyrics. It is not surprising at all that a moron like Tuberville lacks all music or prosody in his brain. Poor man.
anthrosciguy says
Sailors and poetry? I think they’ve heard some. “There once was a lass from Nantucket…”
chigau (違う) says
It is an ancient mariner …
robro says
Would Tommy Tupperware feel the same if the poetry was from the Bible? Some stoic admonitions from Ecclesiastes? Some saucy verses from Song of Solomons? I bet he would have a different take on that poetry being read on an aircraft carrier?
nomdeplume says
Should they have been broadcasting “Ride of the Valkyries” over the loud speaker?
Another example of Trump brain rot.
Anne, Cranky Cat Lady says
Does little Tommy Tuberville object to our stalwart men of the Navy reciting poems while on aircraft carriers, writing poems while on aircraft carriers, or writing poems on the subject of aircraft carriers? All of the above? What a nitwit, and why do I have “In The Navy” by the Village People stuck in my head?
garydargan says
Among my father’s library I found two books of poetry. Both were written in WW2 for the troops fighting against Japan. They were light-hearted looks at the war accompanied by cartoon illustrations. More than a few of the poems mentioned thoughts of home. The woke man who owned those books served in the Royal Australian Air Force in world war 2. His first squadron was thrown into the desperate defense of Darwin in the early days of the war against Japan. His squadron flew lumbering twin-engine bombers on raids against Japanese bases defended by Zero fighters which outgunned and outflew them. Nearly 80% of the squadron was killed and they were reduced to two serviceable planes before they were moved south to assemble and deliver more bombers to other squadrons in Northern Australia. I inherited my love of reading and literature from my father. For their heroism and service in that early desperate battle the woke heroes of his squadron were the first foreign military unit to be awarded the US Presidential Unit Citation. Tommy Tumourville should wake up and stop denigrating the servicemen and women who put their lives on the line to defend his worthless hide.
drsteve says
If this all leads to the filthiest limericks our nation’s sailors can devise getting read in sad, solemn tones on the Senate floor it will all be worth it.
hemidactylus says
@2- chigau (違う)
Iron Maiden version!
Reginald Selkirk says
Ironically, Tommy Potatao-head claims that attempts to make recruits feel valued and appreciated will somehow hurt recruiting. I guess he is worried about offending the bigoted thugs he would like the military to be populated with.
gijoel says
He would if you’d have pulled your finger out, jackass. Obviously Tommy is stonewalling in order to get something else, anyone know what it is, or is he this stupid?*
*If you have to ask you already know.
fredbrehm says
I wonder what he thinks of composing song lyrics on a navy vessel. Would he have complained about Francis Scott Key?
WMDKitty -- Survivor says
https://youtu.be/T1P3HDSVogg
wzrd1 says
fredbrehm @ 11, I suspect he’d only want poetry written in Russian, like all of his fellow far right brethren.
wereatheist says
How cute. An American Taliban. OK, the real Taliban were more preoccupied with music and dancing (but did destroy poetry books as well).
I guess his version of Jesus loves what he does.
Akira MacKenzie says
Patton was notorious for publishing maudlin poetry. Is this backwoods jock questioning the manliness of one of the right’s favorite military psychopaths?
Tethys says
I really need the SE states to stop electing utter idiots to public office. I am not at all shocked that this fool thinks poetry is “woke”, and probably thinks the military is 100% manly male menz with women recruits allowed to be clerical staff.
Maybe someone should tell him that the category of poetry includes music and The Pledge of Allegiance?
Alternatively, maybe he would be satisfied that our military isn’t too woke by reading some 1000 year old Norse poetry over the loudspeaker? Old Norse is a rather harsh and guttural language, and conveniently has many poems about blood and battle in its corpus.
There is a rather good one which is about Valkyries deciding fate and weaving a victory banner using human skulls for weights and guts for warp.
“Cast is the warp for the fortunes of war.
Rows wrought on the beam in a rain of blood. “. DAR
ardipithecus says
John McCrae, 1915
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
Yeah, soldiers and poetry . . .
Why is Tuberville still in that position? Surely there is someone who could remove him short of shooting the bastard!
chrislawson says
Has anyone let Tatertown know that the national anthem has rhyming and meter?
robro says
wzrd @ #13 — “I suspect he’d only want poetry written in Russian…” I think Potatoville is one of the members of congress pushing to get the US to stop supporting Ukraine…for you-know-who’s benefit. So, the question has come up about whether he has any off-the-record associations with Russian operatives. He wouldn’t be the only one in US politics with suspicious connections to Russians. Of course, screwing up the US military would fit in with that hidden agenda as well.
Marcus Ranum says
Tuberville: Proving Socrates was right about Democracy.
Marcus Ranum says
Wilfred Owen
raven says
This is an assertion without proof or data and may be dismissed without proof or data.
No, the Navy isn’t “woke”.
No, we (who is we anyway, stupid rednecks from Alabama?) aren’t losing recruits right and left.
Even my right wingnut gibberish to English Google translator can’t make sense out of what this guy really means.
I don’t know much about Tuberville but it is possible he has the same problem as Sarah Palin and MT Greene. That is, he is just very stupid.
bcw bcw says
@11 The star spangled banner was originally only a poem. It was later to be put to the melody of an English drinking song, “To Anacreon in Heaven.” lyrics:
“To ANACREON in Heav’n, where he sat in full Glee,
A few Sons of Harmony sent a Petition,
That He their Inspirer and Patron wou’d be;
When this Answer arriv’d from the JOLLY OLD GRECIAN
“Voice, Fiddle, and Flute,
“No longer be mute,
“I’ll lend you my Name and inspire you to boot,
“And, besides, I’ll instruct you like me, to intwine
“The Myrtle of VENUS with BACCHUS’s Vine.
etc.
“The white cracker who wrote the National Anthem knew what he was doing. He set the word “free” to a note so high nobody could reach it. That was deliberate.”
― Tony Kushner, Perestroika
microraptor says
ardipithecus @17: Well, he lives in Florida despite having run for office in Alabama, which is not supposed to be allowed. He used a home owned by his son, who has the same first name as him, as his address when he registered as an Alabama voter two weeks before he entered the race for his seat in Congress. That ought to be enough to get him kicked out of office, but of course in the US’s completely dysfunctional political climate it’s considered a good thing.
raven says
Well, OK, I now know more about Tuberville than I wish I did.
He is both stupid and a racist.
He means that the navy doesn’t have enough white racists or Nazis.
Tuberville doesn’t realize that is a feature, not a bug these days.
StevoR says
I wonder if knows or cares that the warship fromthe days of sail the USS Constitution was saved by a poem :
Source and full poem here : https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/46547/old-ironsides
Oh and people back in those olden (“manly manly man MAN!!!1thy!”) days* cared about statutes – technically figureheads and took action against them too – something I didn’t realise till reading this :
Source : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Constitution#Old_Ironsides
I wonder if he knows the ancient Samurai were famously also poets and considers them “woke” and thus somehow “weak” or something?
Source : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samurai#Arts
A tradition that continued with the Kamikaze wearing special belts sewn by their mothers and composing and reading death poems before departing on their missions :
Source : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kamikaze#Cultural_background
Sheesh, I guess that made the kamikaze all “woke” and thus weak and ineffective and feminised and all huh? FFS.
Even the ancient Spartans from what I recall hearing or reading somewhere were apparently famously concerned about getting their long hair nicely groomed before battle.. (Not something depicted in thr kinda period peice 300 oddly enough!**)
But no, fhe mighty USA must be fre of all poetry, all art and it seems all education lest its sailors and marines actually think for themselves because who wants a military that’s cpaable of art and intellect not just the bluntest of cannon fodder huh?
.* Where navies and sailors were famous for experiencing “rum, sodomy and the lash!”
.** Is a Sarc tag really required there?
StevoR says
@21. Marcus Ranum : Love that poem. Incredibly powerful and thought-provoking. There’s also so many others of Wilfred Owen like this one – – The Parable of the Old Man and the Young (1917) which, in fairness, probly could get military people thinking a bit too much for the “leaders” liking.
Then there’s the other war poets (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_poetry ) like Seigfried Sassoon (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siegfried_Sassoon) all the way back to Homer although whether he actually took part in any fighting is unclear and probly unlikely.
But no, let’s not have any military that’s educated, artistic, thoughtful or more than barely literate brutes and, oh yeah, *(thanks #25 raven) also let’s have amilitary full of racists and committed to a racist white suprmacist agenda becuase that will sure win hearts and minds overseas and not lead to war crimes and atrocities like the ones comitted by, say, Aussie SAS pyschopath and beloved “hero” of multi-millionaire Kerry Stokes, Ben Roberts-Smith who does not seem to have written any decent poetry..
StevoR says
^ See :
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Roberts-Smith#Defamation_suit
Plus on Aussie SAS forces flying the nazi flag : https://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-06-14/photo-shows-nazi-flag-flown-over-australian-army-vehicle/9859618
As well as the Confederate one :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-22/australian-soldiers-signal-with-confederate-flag-in-afghanistan/12476530
Unsurprisingly a lot of war crimes allegations – many found to be true during BRSés defamiation case – have since come to light. Our media, of course, has been attacked for, y’know, exposing the truth by the reichwing of politics too..
raven says
The ancient Greeks also combined poetry with warriors and warfare.
Two of the great seminal works of Western literature were by Homer, the Iliad and the Odyssey, both about war and warriors, the Trojan war and Odysseus.
The Norse Vikings were also famous for their Sagas, stories is poem and prose dealing with important subjects of their day.
I see Tuberville’s error here, at least the latest of a lifetime.
He is assuming military soldiers and sailors are stupid, illiterate thugs whose spare time is spent gambling, chasing women, drinking, and beating each other up.
This was never necessarily true.
In times past, military people could be literate and cultured as well as competent at warfare.
In our High Tech era, where our military deals with expensive, highly computerized weapons systems, we need smart, educated people to run everything.
StevoR says
@25. raven : “The Democrats are attacking our military, saying we need to get out the white extremists, the white nationalists, people that don’t believe in our agenda,” Tuberville lamented.
Isn’t that an implicit admission that Tommy Tuberville is, himself, a white nationalist extremist who has that as his – “..our..” – agenda? Has there been any follow up on that and well deserved pushback and note taken of it? Hmm..
Source : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tommy_Tuberville#Comments_on_white_nationalists
John Morales says
Differently framed pushback:
https://www.military.com/daily-news/opinions/2023/08/22/american-military-too-woke.html
Pierce R. Butler says
StevoR @ # 30, quoting raven @ # 25 quoting Alabama’s senior senator: “The Democrats are attacking our military, saying we need to get out the white extremists, the white nationalists, people that don’t believe in our agenda,” …
Since TT clearly made that up, we can’t compare it to any original, but I think he meant to impute that last phrase to the Democratic Party: “… saying, ‘we need to get out the … people that don’t believe in our agenda.’”
Every accusation a confession, again. [insert roll-eyes emoji]
Does the right wing in other nations do this even half so much?
whywhywhy says
Isn’t the Star Spangled Banner poetry?
Akira MacKenzie says
@26
I also recall that another art that the samurai practiced was flower arrangement.
Akira MacKenzie says
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
“Forward, the Light Brigade!
Charge for the guns!” he said.
Into the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
—Alfred, Lord Tennyson
wzrd1 says
Marcus Ranum @ 20, as I recall, the Athenians refused to allow the idios the right to vote. Idios being uneducated and yes, idiot is a modern derivative of that original term. No education, no land, no vote.
Of course, there’s the Heinlein school of political thought. Only those who served could run for office or vote.
That’d get Tommy out instantly, as well as most of the majority of other idiots in misleadership positions, leaving a controllable number still in office that did serve.
Nah, that school of politics resulted in an outright fascist government.
Erp says
He went without fears, went gaily, since go he must,
And drilled and sweated and sang, and rode in the heat and dust
Of the summer; his fellows were round him, as eager as he,
While over the world the gloomy days of the war dragged heavily.
He fell without a murmur in the noise of battle; found rest
‘Midst the roar of hooves on the grass, a bullet struck through his breast.
Perhaps he drowsily lay; for him alone it was still,
And the blood ran out of his body, it had taken so little to kill.
…
To know that he was not a unit, a pawn whose place can be filled;
Not blood, but the beautiful years of his coming life have been spilled,
The days that should have followed, a house and a home, maybe,
For a thousand may love and marry and nest, but so shall not he.
…
Ferenc Békássy 1914
killed 22 June 1915
imback says
There once was a moron named Tommy
Who said that our Navy’s turned Commie
Cuz the sailors delight
In a Red sky at night
A signal to make the day “bomby”
Brony, Social Justice Cenobite says
I want to call Tuberville “Lord DARVO”.
gijoel says
Oh, he was a football coach. If that ain’t gonna get you a ticket on the B ark, then I don’t know what would.
hemidactylus says
@35- Akira MacKenzie
Iron Maiden version!
submoron says
From Wikipedia’s article on Gray’s Elegy.
“There is a story that the British General James Wolfe read the poem before his troops arrived at the Plains of Abraham in September 1759 as part of the Seven Years’ War. After reading the poem, he is reported to have said: “Gentlemen, I would rather have written those lines than take Quebec tomorrow.”[“
dbinmn says
The Death of the Ball Turret Gunner by Randall Jarrell
From my mother’s sleep I fell into the State,
And I hunched in its belly till my wet fur froze.
Six miles from earth, loosed from its dream of life,
I woke to black flak and the nightmare fighters.
When I died they washed me out of the turret with a hose.
F.O. says
Well, reality is woke now.
I don’t think this guy here spends a lot of time thinking about the rationality, consistency and goodness of his positions.
He just listens to people, what words are flying around, and rearranges them in sound bites that flow along his perception of what other bigoted morons will respond to.
Calling out him or his followers on their hypocrisy and ignorance won’t affect them, because that’s now how their minds work.
I wonder if calling them out on their refusal to grow up and then just avoid engaging with them seriously would work better.
chesapeake says
Thank you for the poetry. Very moving.
birgerjohansson says
Tethys @ 16
Fä dör
Fränder dör
Själv dör du likaledes
Ett vet jag som aldrig dör
Dom över död man.
(Translation to modern Swedish by Åke Ohlmarks, who also translated Tolkien’s works)
birgerjohansson says
Akira MacKenzie @ 34
Flower arrangemang was considered a military art, as it required precision.
birgerjohansson says
He may live in Florida, but Alabama is a state of mind.
Tethys says
@Birger
I know that verse, and it is apropos.
Cattle die
Friends die
You will likewise die
The only thing that never dies
The reputation of dead men.
~Odin
Autobot Silverwynde says
Dude’s broken the world’s record for days lived without a functional brain. He should be “proud”.
Tethys says
Ashes to ashes, funk to funky
We know Sen. Tom’s a flunky
Strung out in heaven’s high
Hitting an all-time low
~Ziggy Stardust
Marcus Ranum says
I also recall that another art that the samurai practiced was flower arrangement.
Musashi did brush and ink paintings, when he wasn’t fighting duels with oars or katana. He was decidedly “woke” and wrote a very thoughtful book on strategy, which remains a classic. Japan named one of its mega-battleships after him. Tuberville will never leave such a mark in history.
christoph says
@fredbrehm, # 11: He’d approve of Francis Scott Key. The man was a raging bigot.
christoph says
In Tuberville’s defense, reading poetry does turn you gay. Kind of like listening to Judy Collins.
timgueguen says
Wait until Tommy Turnip finds out they allow Negros to serve in the US Army these days.
whheydt says
I wonder how he’ll react when he finds out that there are SCA branches on some of the US aircraft carriers?
Re: Anne, Cranky Cat Lady @ #5…
I like the Muppet Show version.
muttpupdad says
Seems that this would be more to his liking,
astringer says
muttpupdad @57
men… and no dames
<couldn’t resist>
Raging Bee says
Sailors also write letters to their families while they’re on ships. Does this dime-store Jesse Helms have a problem with that too?
llyris says
@54 christoph
@5 Anne crazy cat lady
See!!!! The Village People sang poetry about being in the navy and it made them all gay.
rietpluim says
Thanks everyone for introducing some fine poems.
@PZ Can we have something like an infinite thread dedicated to poetry?
wzrd1 says
…never saw a purple cow, but I’d rather see than be one”.
Probably, the reason I’ve never appreciated most poetry is due to my dyslexia.
But, the Star Spangled Banner did resonate, as did similar poems.
Context and dyslexia are important and unaddressed in such primitive training of my youth, during the ice age.
Which I do miss ice. Used to be able to ice skate on Pennsylvania in winter, now, one can only ice skate in a refrigerated arena or one needs rollers.
Not that I ever mastered even level skating…
whheydt says
Re: wzrd1 @ #62…
Longer time line… As a child, my father would ice skate on the East River in Manhattan in winter.
Mark Dowd says
You give these idiots too much credit when you accept that whatever they say happened is what actually happened. I give a better than 95% chance that whatever “poems broadcast on an aircraft carrier loudspeaker” event he’s talking about just didn’t happen. These people invent their own persecution pretty much every time.