I admit to having trouble with the long bow, so I’m old too.
Eric Clapton is King.
shadowsays
Shouldn’t the weapon of Horde choice be the crossbow? Poop Innocent II declared it the weapon of Satan, after all….
barnestormersays
If I were an actual person living in Europe in the Middle Ages, I doubt I’d be able to read Chaucer by any kind of light. Who would have bothered to teach me? Where would they get the time or a book to teach me out of? Maybe, if I were lucky, one of those traveling-performer guys would recite some poetry at the manor, and I could hang around the door until someone noticed me and whacked me on the head. Then, back to the field / kitchen / hay / whatever, maybe with a couple of songy words clattering around in my head.
barnestormersays
On the other hand, I would know enough to see that strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
Supreme executive power derves from a manadate from the masses, not some farcical acquatic ceremony!
kings are weird, eh? weird and clean.
Pensays
Well at least you can flatter yourself that you’re an extremely privileged middle-ager if you were ever in a position to read Chaucer at all. One of the 0.5%, eh… Quit whining about your little problems then. Besides you’re probably doing it in French, the language of the oppressors, so we’re choosing not to understand you either.
Signed – cheeky young peasant.
jrfdeux, mode d'emploisays
#oldworldproblems
playonwordssays
Damn it lost the e-mail you gave
Google UK is celebrating the birth of Mary Anning, thought you might like to know
Trebuchetsays
Google UK is celebrating the birth of Mary Anning, thought you might like to know
As is Google here in the USofA.
robertfostersays
Chaucer: artifice or verisimilitude? That was the topic for a term paper in English at my university. And we had to read the Canterbury Tales in Middle English. It haunts me still.
felidaesays
I remember:
when “a fate worse than death” was not your hard drive crashing
a “tranny” was a part of a car
CocaCola could be used to remove rust from chrome bumpers and as a contraceptive
A McDonalds hamburger was 15 cents
The Republican Party believed in fiscal responsibility
Vicki, duly vaccinated tool of the feminist conspiracysays
“The king is gone but he’s not forgotten.”
Kimpatsusays
Yes, it’s originally from Private Eye.
—
@PZ: I’m the King, so send me a chest full of gold and rubies, and your first-born, as tribute. In return I shall knight thee, so thou mayst take the bishops (to the cleaners).
Ray, rude-ass yankeesays
King eh? Very nice. And how’d you get that? By exploiting the workers! By ‘angin on to outdated imperialist dogma, in which the working classes…
mrmisconception says
You don’t know who the king is?
It’s simple, he hasn’t got shit all over him.
Scr... Archivist says
If there is a Middle English version of this, I’d like to see it. I wonder how difficult it would be to read.
georgelocke says
Isn’t knowing who The King is a sign that you’re getting old?
richardelguru says
ic ne cunne wat thaere cnichtes spreche… (thaetes ynogh of thaet, Ed)
Is that originally from Private Eye?
Kevin Kehres says
I agree with #3. Elvis is still the King.
Unless you’re talking about BB King.
Konradius says
Since last year the Netherlands have Willem-Alexander as king. Does that help?
jrfdeux, mode d'emploi says
Bloody peasants.
Tony! The Fucking Queer Shoop! says
Everyone knows
Jesus ChristMohammedL Ron Hubbard, our lord and savior, is King.blf says
You survived your 30th birthday.
What a Maroon, el papa ateo says
Kevin Kehres, #5
Definitely Elvis.
Trebuchet says
Siege engines. Needs something about siege engines. New-fangled trebuchets, or something.
ambassadorfromverdammt says
Hey You Kings! Get those siege engines off my lawn!
steve78b says
In my day we didn’t have no siege engines….. we got together and thowed rocks…. big ones….. uphill …… both ways….
…..siege engines…… kings these days have it so easy……
…harumph…….
Al Dente says
Don’t you remember who you voted for to be king?
Oh wait, you don’t vote for kings. Instead, they’re chosen by watery women tossing swords at the candidate.
abusedbypenguins says
There is no king on this planet who can play better than BB King. Elvis is second fiddle.
cgm3 says
But I thought we were a narco-syndicalist commune!
shadow says
Does he (the king) know the average velocity, in wing beats per second, of an unladen swallow?
Lynna, OM says
I admit to having trouble with the long bow, so I’m old too.
Eric Clapton is King.
shadow says
Shouldn’t the weapon of Horde choice be the crossbow? Poop Innocent II declared it the weapon of Satan, after all….
barnestormer says
If I were an actual person living in Europe in the Middle Ages, I doubt I’d be able to read Chaucer by any kind of light. Who would have bothered to teach me? Where would they get the time or a book to teach me out of? Maybe, if I were lucky, one of those traveling-performer guys would recite some poetry at the manor, and I could hang around the door until someone noticed me and whacked me on the head. Then, back to the field / kitchen / hay / whatever, maybe with a couple of songy words clattering around in my head.
barnestormer says
On the other hand, I would know enough to see that strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
Supreme executive power derves from a manadate from the masses, not some farcical acquatic ceremony!
kings are weird, eh? weird and clean.
Pen says
Well at least you can flatter yourself that you’re an extremely privileged middle-ager if you were ever in a position to read Chaucer at all. One of the 0.5%, eh… Quit whining about your little problems then. Besides you’re probably doing it in French, the language of the oppressors, so we’re choosing not to understand you either.
Signed – cheeky young peasant.
jrfdeux, mode d'emploi says
#oldworldproblems
playonwords says
Damn it lost the e-mail you gave
Google UK is celebrating the birth of Mary Anning, thought you might like to know
Trebuchet says
As is Google here in the USofA.
robertfoster says
Chaucer: artifice or verisimilitude? That was the topic for a term paper in English at my university. And we had to read the Canterbury Tales in Middle English. It haunts me still.
felidae says
I remember:
when “a fate worse than death” was not your hard drive crashing
a “tranny” was a part of a car
CocaCola could be used to remove rust from chrome bumpers and as a contraceptive
A McDonalds hamburger was 15 cents
The Republican Party believed in fiscal responsibility
Vicki, duly vaccinated tool of the feminist conspiracy says
“The king is gone but he’s not forgotten.”
Kimpatsu says
Yes, it’s originally from Private Eye.
—
@PZ: I’m the King, so send me a chest full of gold and rubies, and your first-born, as tribute. In return I shall knight thee, so thou mayst take the bishops (to the cleaners).
Ray, rude-ass yankee says
King eh? Very nice. And how’d you get that? By exploiting the workers! By ‘angin on to outdated imperialist dogma, in which the working classes…