Bluefield College is looking for someone to teach general biology. They have a few requirements before hiring you, though. It always amazes me how they can get away with this.

The individual must be a committed Christian and have ability to integrate faith and learning, ability to foster critical and creative thinking, ability to work cooperatively within the campus community to advance the mission of the college and demonstrated excellence in undergraduate teaching.

Bluefield College is a private, four-year liberal arts college located in the scenic Virginia highlands. The college is Christ-centered in its mission, global in its outlook, and is in covenant with the Baptist General Association of Virginia. The institution does not discriminate on the basis of national or ethnic origin, gender, or race.

Imagine if we godless folk could set equivalent requirements — it would freak the fanatics out.

The individual must be a committed atheist and have ability to integrate reason and learning, ability to foster critical and creative thinking, ability to work cooperatively within the campus community to advance the mission of the college and demonstrated excellence in undergraduate teaching.

My Imaginary Secular University is a private, four-year liberal arts college located in the scenic Arctic wastelands, in an underground bunker beneath a skull-shaped mountain. The college is science-centered in its mission, global in its outlook, and is in covenant with the National Academy of Sciences. The institution does not discriminate on the basis of national or ethnic origin, gender, sexual orientation, or race.

Hey, wait, I’d sign up for that in a heartbeat! Why don’t we have any godless universities anywhere? (And don’t try to tell me they all are — even my secular state university goes tippy-toes around religion.)