The beans have been spilled. I lied. I am not the Digital Cuttlefish, I am not leaving Scienceblogs, I have no talent for poetry, and I am not a nice person.

I am highly untrustworthy, though. I had people asking all day if I was really in Elmhurst and if I was really going to the local pub last night. I’m a little worried that I’ll get home to find the wife has changed the locks on me.