Comments

  2. jfatz says

    I wish I were related to George Carlin… Family reunions would be SO goddam entertaining! ;-)

  3. fardels bear says

    This reminds me of routines he did decades ago about his Catholic education, and questions he’d ask the priest. “Suppose, Father you go to Confession, but you are on a cruise ship? And then the ship crosses the international dateline, and then you die? Do you go Hell because the last time you went to Confession was the DAY BEFORE? Huh? What then Father?”

    Anyone who had a brush with Catholic education can appreciate that.

  8. Aris says

    Sadly, I don’t think it’s merely age. He’s been abusing all sorts of substances and has been in and out of rehab — even recently. And he’s had heart trouble. That could explain why he seems much older than 70. Sharp as ever though. I’d love being related to him too. I’d have an eloquent ally during family dinner debates with benighted relatives.
    ____________________________________________

  9. Charles Minus says

    Excuse me, but could I point out that one of the “signs of age” is increased wisdom?

  11. Holbach says

    I only hope there were a lot of religious retards there
    and they were bullshit over Carlin saying all those nasty
    and truthful things about their freaking religion. The one
    about the freaking bible being all made up was the one that
    I hope put a lot of them over the edge. Keep at it George,
    and don’t let up on the morons, and get even nastier.

  13. Bill the Cat says

    Does this mean a one-armed man could not become the US president, a state governor, a city mayor, a chief of police, or a witness in court?

    What if the ‘bible’ is a dictionary recovered with a bible cover?

    He’s onto the contradiction of legal oaths. If the oath is binding via divine retribution, then why outlaw perjury?

  14. says

    I only hope there were a lot of religious retards there and they were bullshit over Carlin saying all those nasty and truthful things about their freaking religion.

    I only hope there were a lot of libertarians there who got offended when he pointed out that the “rights” they keep going on about are imaginary.

  15. MandyDax says

    I love George. I find it amusing how some of the funniest and most rational atheists are those who were raised Catholic and gave it up. What is it that George says? “Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.” If you ever want a good reason not to believe in God, read the Bible.

    Thanks for posting this, PZ. I needed a few good laughs today.

  16. marcia says

    His timing and emphasis remain impeccable. He appears physically old, but he spoke fluidly like that, with but one mistake of the tongue, for 70 minutes.

    Maybe I’ll go outside and light up a fatty and see if I can be that friggin’ articulate for even 5 minutes.

    “When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front row seat.”
    …..Carlin

  17. says

    I’ve always been a fan of Carlin, whether he attacks the Catholic church, corporate interests, government, etc. I find myself laughing less and shaking my fist more when I watch him though because he’s telling the absolute truth.

    And yes, 12 years of Catholic schools. Ask me about my confirmation sometime. It was my first experiment in capitalism.

  18. Jennifer says

    He’s spot on about the rights. I’ve been told since forever, have read it myself many many times, that I have the right to bear arms. But I was born with human arms. And in going on 40 years now, I’ve never been able to find out where I go to get the bear arms that God promised to me. Which, let’s face it, is pretty damn weak on God’s part. You’d think they’d have an office or something for handing out bear arms, since he promised them to everyone in America.

    BTW, PZ, I’m thinking you might really enjoy hearing Chumbawamba’s Jesus H. Christ, and in particular the song Get Off My Cloud, which is premised on an American housewife who claims to have taken mid-air photographs of Jesus Christ in the skies over Indiana. The chorus is “have your fun whilst you’re alive, You won’t get nothing when you die, Have a good time all the time, Because you won’t get nothing when you die.”

    Plus, it’s a very catchy tune.

  19. LisaJ says

    That was fantastic! He so eloquently expresses what I’ve always felt my whole life, even as a good little catholic child.

  21. craig says

    Saw him live in Oct. 2006, he was trying this material out for the first time. He looked bad, and he said he had been in the hospital.

    The last few years he has gone downhill drastically health-wise. Look at his ’98 (or was it ’96?) special, and he looks about 25 years younger.

  22. Ivan says

    Jennifer: thanks for the recommendation. I’ll second it. (gotta love bittorr… I mean, the Library of Internet)

  24. sheep! says

    Number 11: I saw Carlin years ago (98/99?) when he played at a casino in Louisiana. He got the “Invisible Man”/God portion of his bit and suddenly a sea of people got up and left. It was highly entertaining to watch some of those who stayed squirm for a second.

  25. Ichthyic says

    “Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.”

    which, IIRC, he said was about 2 years old.

    :p

  26. Jennifer says

    Ivan – sorry to say but you can’t find Jesus H. Christ anywhere for sale or download (or can you? did you find it at bittorrent? I never was able to locate a digital copy anywhere)…the band did a LOT of sampling, including some instrumental bits from Sgt. Pepper…and Sir Paul had a problem with that, slapped them with a lawsuit, and as a result, only the initial pressing of 7500 LPs ever was released.

    I, however, happen to own one of them:) And would be willing to rip a copy for you now that I have it recorded to my hard drive. That is, if you can’t find it at bittorent.

  29. craig says

    “I’m really glad i had the chance to see him live a couple years back.”

    Me too. Kinda felt like I had to when I had the chance, before it was too late.

    Later that month Lewis Black was in town, but it was impossible to get tickets.

  33. says

    Yeah, it doesn’t look too good. I worry about what will happen when he does pass on. Editorial cartoons always show celebrities getting into Heaven when they die (remember kiddies, fame = good). So either they will make him a deathbed Christian or show in him Hell. I shudder to think what those christards who do pre-death obits have in store for Carlin. Carlin may not care what people say about him after he dies. Me, I see people viewing it as “lets bash Atheists” fest.

  34. Ichthyic says

    good seed, too.

    actually, I should say that it’s good speed, but there appears to be one song from just one album missing, according the commentary and from the peer list:

    Missing file:
    “All mixed up” from Swinging with Raymond.

    other than that, appears to be complete.

  35. kid bitzer says

    physically, he’s not young for his age–probably a little better than the median physical condition for a 70 y.o., but you’d never mistake him for 60.

    but cognitively? that was an *astounding* performance. even if he only did this 8-minute clip, he just passed 34 memory tests with flying colors. plus diction, timing, sequential thought, etc. he just put himself in in the 99th percentile for cognitive functioning at that age. you just watched a mental jack lalane.

    also: funny as shit. but that has always been true about him.

  36. Ivan says

    Jennifer- very kind of you to offer. But you’ll be surprised sometimes what you can find on bittorrent… I really was seconding the recommendation because I’d just listened to it. :^)

  37. Rey Fox says

    Articulate, yes, but I notice that he’s slowed down and is not yelling as much. I kind of like it, really. It imparts a sense of confidence and authority* in his words.

    * Kind of ironic, seeing how he views authority.

  38. Jennifer says

    Great find, guys! Although they’re showing a lot of tracks that were not on the album, and Chumbawamba re-recorded most of the tracks minus the samples as SHHHH!, so hard to tell which version they’ve posted without downloading all of it… I’m not gonna download it because, well, I already have all that stuff, so can’t tell you fer sure…but the Get Off My Cloud song I’m sure kicks ass whichever version you’re listening to. They’re big time atheists. There’s a line in “Stairway to Heaven” that goes “Georgie got the needle and Georgie got a hit, Georgie got religion and a savior on a stick, there’s a thousand Georgies all posing in a field, which are false and which are real”…they’re pretty unconcerned about offending anyone, which may be why this album has been one of my favorites ever.

  40. Jennifer says

    Oooo – and one more thing…be sure to check out “Misbehavor” (esp. the “brittle mix”) – it will totally crack your shit up. Consists of reciting the names of various of the “cultural elite” over some serious acid house mix; in the chorus they sing “and now we’ve come for your children, we’re gonna kidnap your children, we’re gonna brainwash your children, and sell them to the devil.” Even after literally hundreds of listenings, it still makes me smile.

  41. Jennifer says

    Thanks for the tip, tonyk. Except I think I’d like to change the text on the shirt.

    I want mine to say:

    “God promised me the right to bear arms, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.”

  42. Ichthyic says

    Although they’re showing a lot of tracks that were not on the album

    hmm, are you sure you aren’t looking at the list of tracks from the rest of the albums? Because it’s actually a collection of 12 albums, JHC being just one of them.

    Anarchy
    English Rebel Songs 1381-1914
    First 2
    Jesus H Christ
    Readymades
    Shhh (so you get the original AND the re-recorded version)
    Showbusiness
    Slap
    Swingin With Raymond
    Tubthumper
    Un
    Wysiwyg

    I’m not gonna download it because, well, I already have all that stuff,

    you have all 12 albums?? man, these guys must be good.

  43. Ichthyic says

    “God promised me the right to bear arms, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.”

    actually, I want a shirt that shows someone being mauled by a bear, and underneath it says:

    “God promised me the right to bear arms, but I couldn’t convince the bear to give up his.”

  44. Jennifer says

    Ichthyic – Yeah, I saw it was a whole slew of their albums, but I do have ’em already – what can I say, I’m a sucker for militant atheist/anarchist bands. Plus, I worked in a used record store when I was in grad school and got really great deals on music. Their playlist showed a lot of tracks they’ve tagged with Jesus H Christ that aren’t on that album.

  45. Ichthyic says

    Their playlist showed a lot of tracks they’ve tagged with Jesus H Christ that aren’t on that album.

    hmm, can you email me the correct track list, along with any others you noticed? I’m sure since that seed has been maintained for so long, that there are a lot of people that would appreciate it.

    fisheyephotosAThotmailDOTcom

    cheers

    p.s. already listened to the first two albums, and had a “oh! so THAT’S who those guys are!” moment.

  47. Jennifer says

    Ichthyic – sure, no problem. I looked at the playlist again, and really can’t quite figure out what’s up with it. There’s actually quite a few song titles from the album that are missing and quite a few misattributed. The misattributed titles don’t match up with the samples on the album either, so that’s not it…hmmm. Anyway I’ll send ya what I have.

  48. Ichthyic says

    thanks.

    I hate adding stuff to my collection that has errors in it.

    …and this stuff belongs in my collection.

    :)

  49. Jennifer says

    yeah, it’s good stuff, hard to believe they’ve only gotten airplay here with that “I get knocked down” song when there’s so much more, and better, there. Glad you like it, means we’ve both been able to do a favor:) (Just emailed the song titles).

  50. Rey Fox says

    “yeah, it’s good stuff, hard to believe they’ve only gotten airplay here with that “I get knocked down” song when there’s so much more, and better, there.”

    Not hard at all to believe. Do they have any other songs that dozens of frat boys can belt out in unison? If not, then of course they’ll stay underground.

  51. says

    I wouldn’t be too surprised if the “errors” in the list are deliberate. This is Chumbawamba after all!

  52. Ivan says

    looks like “Misbehave” isn’t in the torrent, but oh well. Lots of good stuff there anyhow. I liked the backwards bit at the end of “Get Off My Cloud”/”Look! No Strings!”

  53. cm says

    His modern man bit is further proof that just about 70 he could singlehandedly skew the entire world distribution in terms of verbal fluidity, memory, and any other metrics to assess so-called “normal cognitive decline”.

  54. bernarda says

    Here is an encouraging video statement by a youngster, maybe 50 years younger than George. “I am an atheist”.

  55. says

    In the late 80s, I saw him at UND. Fucking hilarious, because he caused a complete shitstorm with his bit about rape:

    “People say some things aren’t funny. They say ‘there are some things that just are not funny’. I say “Bullshit, I can make anything funny”. I ask them, “What’s something that’s not funny?” and of course, they say rape. My response? ‘Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd!’ That’s some funny fuckin’ rape there.”

    For WEEKS the OMG crowd was shitting itself over this. I of course, kept poking them, because, hey, watching overly righteous morons cry is funny.

    Oh, and I saw one of the kids heckle him. Well, they tried to.

    Yes. That’s right. I saw a college student, presumably someone with some basic level of intelligence try to *heckle George Carlin*.

    He gave us a bonus showing of all the profanity he knows…directed at one person. I’ve never in my life seen anything like it. A *stream* of profanity, used perfectly, and quite imaginatively, (At the time, I worked on airplanes, outdoors, at night, *in North Dakota*. I know profanity), directed at one person…whose sense of self disintegrated. Beautiful, just…beautiful.

  56. Yossarian says

    My 2-year-old daughter is a big fan of George. Of course, right now it’s limited to his narration of some episodes of “Thomas the Tank Engine”. She actually does seem to prefer his his voice over the others.

  58. windy says

    He’s spot on about the rights. I’ve been told since forever, have read it myself many many times, that I have the right to bear arms. But I was born with human arms.

    McCain’s criticism of bear DNA studies is very short-sighted, since how else are we going to realize this goal?

  59. Graculus says

    “God promised me the right to bear arms, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.”

    Up here there’s a rather popular one:

    “In the US you have the right to bear arms, in Ontario you have the right to bare breasts. Where would you rather live?”

  60. Peter Ashby says

    It’s the same in many parts of the world. Here in the UK it is not obscene or offensive for a woman to bare her breasts in public. May not be advisable, but that is a different issue.

  61. Heather says

    @ Craig (#29)

    I saw Lewis Black when he was in town last year. He had me nearly in tears from laughing so hard. But really, when I think about it, he’s just vocalizing many of the things I was already thinking.

    I’m glad I wasn’t sitting front row though, I’d be too preoccupied about where to hide when his head exploded, because one of these days…it will.

    But Carlin, man I wish I could see him live. Not many more chances for that, I’m thinking.

  62. Interrobang says

    “My response? ‘Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd!’ That’s some funny fuckin’ rape there.”

    Weirdly, I can’t get to “funny” from there. (I musta took a wrong toin at Albequoique.) More like, “Uh, ew.”

  63. davery says

    Carlin is great. I just saw that special last week. Strangely enough, when I went to get my 2-year-old a passport on Saturday they asked my wife and I to raise our right hands and swear that the information we had provided was true. No bible though. I had to restrain myself to keep from laughing the whole time however, remembering that bit.

  64. Sven DiMilo says

    Love it.
    Old-timer report: 1975, Stanley Theater, Pittsburgh.
    My buddy Tom had a Tic-Tac box full of “Colombian” shake…my first time. I have not laughed so much so hard before or in the 33 years since as I did that night at with George Carlin.
    And he’s still got it. His style, all this time, of memorized-word-for-word deadpan schtick is antithetical to my usual taste in (improvisational) art, but he’s just so damn right all the time that I don’t care.

  65. says

    George Carlin? George Carlin? I vaguely thought George had kicked the bucket, then gone and kicked The Great Sky Fairy’s arse, some years ago. It’s great to see (and watch!) him.

  66. Inky says

    #18: “And in going on 40 years now, I’ve never been able to find out where I go to get the bear arms that God promised to me.”

    That was the best. I’m using that from now on.

  67. Ray says

    Good timing! George Carlin is supposed to be coming to Roanoke, VA later this month and I was just planning to see if the wife & I could get tickets and a baby sitter. I’ve always wanted to see him live & in person.

    Cheers,
    Ray

  69. Deepsix says

    This is pretty damn good too. Carlin on religion:

    Sound quality kinda sucks, though.