OmniMyth of Kentucky Theme Park Proposal

Answers in Genesis has led the way with its brand new, soon to be opened, multimillion dollar extravaganza in Kentucky, called the “Creation Museum.” This delightful diversion into fantasy could be but the first in a major undertaking to expand the area into a world class amusement theme park complex in rural Kentucky. Permit me to propose that this pooling of the preposterous be known collectively as “OmniMyth of Kentucky.”

This suggested grouping of sites, featuring magical explanations for everything, is an idea whose time has come. OmniMyth could provide genuine creative comedy relief in a world all too weary with the mess created by failed attempts to solve real problems with make believe. The theme parks could also make their owners a decent profit.

The possible recreational facilities that could be constructed are limited only by the creative imagination of potential designers. The Creation Museum, after all, posits the proposition, which no educated person would hold as true, that the Earth is only a few thousand years old and that it and all life on it were created by magic. The lushly exhibited creationist fantasy rejects, as its central premise, the fact that humans developed from less complex life forms in the process of change over time known as evolution. Instead, the visitor is treated to the myth, presented as true, that humans were magically made from dirt. One can be transported to a time before computers, space stations, and wireless telephones when people wrote on rocks, set broken bones without x-rays, and answered tough questions, like where did people come from, by saying a god did it.

Similar delightful ideas could be represented by similar theme parks grouped in OmniMyth of Kentucky, making the attraction truly international in scope. The diversity of the project might contribute to a lessening of tensions among the world’s peoples, who could come to visit and to see and to laugh at our commonality of recognition that we all share primitive pasts in which our ancestors created make believe stories to explain things not understood. Ancient Greek stories of gods living on a mountain and hurling thunderbolts of lightening. Egyptian stories of preparing the dead for an afterlife by removing the brain. Indian stories of a god who was crucified and arose from the dead. Eskimo stories of a raven who made the sun, moon, stars, the earth, people, and animals.

OmniMyth of Kentucky can put Disney to shame. Thanks to Answers in Genesis, without which this project would not have been birthed, for such creative leadership in education.

Here is a possible advertisement:

“Antidotes to thought. Magical reasons for everything. Fantasy is made real and Myths become true. Pretend it is so and it will be so. See models of humans and dinosaurs together—and you can believe they lived at the same time. See a model of a god pulling the sun across the sky in a chariot—and you can believe it is true. Forget reality for a few hours at OmniMyth of Kentucky where Reality is Fantasy and Fantasy is Reality.”

Edwin Kagin
January 6, 2005