Though it seems, to most pundits, misguided,
Some scenarios have been provided
It may take all your cunning
To see: is she running?
But Palin says “still undecided”
Headline: Palin still undecided on White House run.
She makes Hamlet look positively brash, in comparison.
The in-house Fox psychiatrist
Has seen his share of crazy
Surrounded by his talking points
His frontal lobe’s gone lazy
He claims he has compassion for
“Transsexual” Chaz Bono
But watching “Dancing with the Stars”
While Chaz is on? A no-no!
If children see Chaz dancing, why,
That glorifies her change!
And children might see sex as something
They can re-arrange!
The siren song of surgery
Must surely be entrancing
If children want to nip and tuck
From merely watching dancing
I guess when Fox was looking for
A television shrink
Ability to bullshit trumped
Ability to think
If children are in danger when
They watch the idiot-box
There’s far, far greater damage if
They watch the news on Fox.
More, after the jump:
[Read more…]
In a cop-based “reality” show
Starring Steven Seagal as a pro
If he thinks a cool prank
Involves driving a tank
I suspect the right answer is “NO!”
Headline: Steven Seagal denies role in dog’s death
Actually, there are quite a few stories out, with conflicting claims. Apparently, Seagal took part in a sheriff’s raid, as part of his reality show, and at one point commandeered a tank. Sources disagree as to whether the suspect’s dog was killed in the raid. Sources also disagree as to how much money the suspect is suing for.
No sources disagree that this is precisely the sort of thing that anyone who would watch a Steven Seagal-based reality show is tuning in to see.
Ed has a post up on the predictable online reactions to the new Atheist billboard in Grand Rapids. In the comments, there was a prediction of billboard vandalism, and the (surprising, to me at least) revelation that such “vandalism is actually pretty rare”. Count me among those who expects vandalism, but very willing to be proven wrong.
The story reminds me of a previous billboard campaign by an outgroup that had the temerity to remind us that they exist. Story below the jump:
So today or yesterday, I saw a letter to the editor in a local paper, chastising the editor for something mean said about Rick Perry. The writer was planning on voting for Perry, because “He tells us the truth as he sees it.”
The following is written in the West Texas song tradition, and may be sung with guitar, small band, or just a harmonica by the fireside. Yodeling, however, is a must. It’s a sweet 3/4 time, just a little bit faster than “Waltz Across Texas With You”.
“He tells us the truth as he sees it”
That surely deserves our respect
His view is not sullied by knowledge, or facts,
Or intelligence we can detect.
He’s a church-going, god-fearing Christian
And he’s honest as Sunday is long
There’s nothing that tempts him to change his beliefs
Like the fact that they’re utterly wrong
(yodeling part)
He’s suspicious of climate-change science
Evolution, and the age of the earth
But he’s steadfast and true in his ignorant stance
His resistance to change shows his worth
In hundreds of life-and-death matters
His was always the right choice to make
Though it’s better to execute innocent men
Than admit he could make a mistake
(more yodeling)
See, it just doesn’t pay to be truthful
When consistency makes you look right
If correcting mistakes made you rise in the polls
Then he would. Or he should. Or he might.
But it’s me, and the rest of us voters;
If we checked, then we likely could tell
Still we vote for the one with the prettiest lies
And together, we waltz off to Hell.
(A bit more yodeling)
And together, we waltz off to Hell.
I really like the candidate
I really like his views
His positions on the issues are the ones that I would choose!
I really like the candidate
I’m thinking it’s a sign
Her slogans at the rally were identical to mine!
I really like the candidate
I’m following the bus!
We’re going to take the nation back for those who think like us!
I really like the candidate
I can’t believe my luck
What a miracle I came across another stupid fuck.
So… when Irene dumped rain on ground that had already been saturated, the result was calamity. I’m thinking that A) the primary states have already been saturated with political bullshit, and B) it’s just the beginning of political shitstorm season.
Expect calamity.
The Republican candidates have, of late, put me in mind of “ceremonial deism“.
Atheists are sometimes accused of making mountains out of molehills, of making a big deal out of the pledge of allegiance or “in god we trust” when there are bigger fish to fry. Really, though, it seems to me that it is the handful of god-bothering republican candidates who are keeping a trivial god in the public eye.
I am reminded of the following, from the old blog:
The motto is “In God We Trust”;
Display it everywhere, we must!
In doing so, recall, it’s just
A hollow little phrase.
It’s on our money, even though
It lost religion long ago—
Rote repetition made it so
It’s meaningless these days.
If you’re like me, you find it odd
That those who claim to love their god
Would fight to keep this cheap façade,
Especially on money!
But now, in congress, start the fight
To grow the phrase in public sight—
Replacing God with new “God lite”
You must admit, it’s funny
Remember Teddy Roosevelt
Opposed the motto, cos he felt
It sacrilege to put on gelt,
Insulting the creator
But that was then, and this is now;
We’ll push our god; we don’t care how,
With every method we allow.
And jobs? Well, maybe later.
According to CNN, the crazy season is upon us the House Judiciary Committee has scheduled a vote this thursday, reaffirming “In God We Trust” as our national motto. The Supreme Court has held that ceremonial use of religious language does not constitute a violation of the establishment clause, in cases where rote repetition has rendered the language meaningless.
That is, the phrase is legal if it is meaningless. If lawmakers wish to argue that “In God We Trust” actually refers to their particular choice of god, their usage would apparently violate the First Amendment.
Of course, the real motivation is likely to be considerably more secular; the brilliant legal mind of Michele Bachmann, with the tenacity and quickness of a barnacle, has latched onto President Obama’s use of E Pluribus Unum as more representative of our nation. It is, of course, more inclusive, and less pandering toward any particular religious view. Which makes it utterly unacceptable to Bachmann.
Plus, of course, it’s much easier to score points with one’s constituents this way, than to tackle the important issues.
What is it with the GOP and pledges? The Pledge to America, the No-Tax Pledge, abstinence-only “virginity pledges“, “under god” in the pledge of allegiance… and now, an anti gay marriage pledge. Erm, I mean a pro-traditional marriage pledge.
The nice thing about pledges is, pledging is easier than thinking. Perry, Bachman, Romney, and Santorum no longer have to consider the merits of the idea. They have pledged. They are honor-bound. For Perry, this represents a change from his earlier states’ rights stance. States’ rights is a dog-whistle, but the baggers missed it and accused him of being soft on gay marriage. So…
When he said that it might
Be a state-by-state right
The teabags accused him of hedging
In a matter of days
He was ditching the gays
And to make it official, was pledging
The republican plan
Is one woman, one man,
In the view that’s supported by Perry
Keep the government small
Till eventually, all
It can do is say who you may marry
Cos in matters of love
When a push comes to shove
It’s the government’s job to determine
That there’s one group—the straights—
Who deserve to have mates,
While another, the gays, are mere vermin
There’s no need to decide,
For a groom or a bride,
Cos the pledge means the choice is preempted
The decision’s been made
And it must be obeyed…
On the off chance the governor’s tempted.
Jealously, Zealously,
Oregon Terrorist
Cody Seth Crawford, was
Talking with God;
Whether religion, or
Psychopathology,
Torched up a mosque, in his
Christian Jihad
Crawford, a self-described Christian warrior, told an officer on his Dec. 14 arrest (for unrelated charges), “You look like Obama. You are a Muslim like him. Jihad goes both ways. Christians can jihad too.”
source
He’s being held for psych evaluation, and prosecutors argue he is a flight risk.
I feel sorriest for his 5-yr-old son.
Though the pen is mightier than the sword, the sword speaks louder and stronger at any given moment—The Mouse That Roared
Image: Washington Post/Facebook
Making fun of politicians
Is a noble, grand tradition;
In the freest of societies, it’s cherished as a right
Elsewhere, though, if you’re outspoken
You can get your fingers broken
As this Syrian cartoonist, in the hospital tonight.
The photo above is of cartoonist Ali Ferzat, Syria’s best-known political cartoonist. He is in hospital tonight with broken hands, as a warning not to continue lampooning Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.
Ink is powerful stuff. In the long run, Ferzat and other critics may find they had the power to help topple a government. In the short run, he’s in the hospital with two broken hands.