My faithful friends were wondering,
And I was wondering, too,
When atheists get together—
Just what all do they do?
They have no common purpose,
And so I find it odd,
To think they join together
And talk about “no god”.

My faithful friends were arguing,
I made my case as well,
Which people went to Heaven
And which ones went to Hell.
Which version of our Holy Book
Is better than the rest,
And, ultimately, which of our
Religions was the best.

My faithful friends were fighting
And I, too, joined the fight
God’s Holy Word demanded it
And so we felt it right.
The heretics and infidels
All needed to be taught;
God will not stand for people
Not believing what they ought!

My faithful friends were killing
As we have throughout the years
An internecine battle with
Our brothers and our peers
With countless souls in suffering
And countless hearts in grief
To show that there is nothing
More important than belief

My faithful friends were dying
By the dozens, by the scores
In random city bombings
And in major bloody wars
We lose our lives as instruments
Of God’s own rightful wrath;
And when we’ve gone, our children too
Will follow in our path.

My faithful friends were wondering,
And I was wondering, too,
When atheists get together—
Just what all do they do?
They have no common purpose,
And so I find it odd,
To think they join together
And talk about “no god”.

I had forgotten that the Reason Rally was this weekend. I had a previous engagement, so I wouldn’t have been able to go anyway, but it would have been a nice chance to visit my nieces. Who would gladly have gone, too.

But I did see Penn Jillette’s piece at CNN on the rally. And for some reason, CNN decided that this would be one of the pieces they still allow comments on, cos what could possibly be contentious about a gathering of atheists? And all the usual suspects were there–the “if atheists don’t believe in God, how come they spend all their time trying to convince other people yadda yadda yadda”, the “what would or could an atheist say to a dying person?”, the “there are no atheists once the bullets start flying”–as if internet comments are a hermetically sealed environment

Oh, yeah, the verse itself was originally written in 2010, for the first Global Atheist Convention, but it has not been posted here since a requested reprise about 5 years ago. So it might be new to some of you.