I tried on a new piece of clothing
It was fuzzy and silken and red
It looked quite a lot like a sweater
But there wasn’t a hole for my head.
I struggled to put it on anyway,
But no matter what angle I tried
My arms found their sleeves without problem,
But my head stayed completely inside.
There’s something that’s wrong with this picture
And I’m quite at a loss, what to do—
So I talked to the guy at the counter…
He suggested I try it in blue.
It may be the style, or the fashion
But it keeps me from using my head
So instead of just wishing it fit me
I’ll try something different instead.
*sustained applause*
Perhaps said person was trying on a pair of pants by mistake. Those would be appropriate for someone whose head was up his ass. :)
But seriously folks.. your subsequent mini-essay about the mischaracterization of Atheists is a gem. I have lifted it for further reference.
Bravo! Er… I mean, Ramen!
Absolutely brilliant! I know quite a few people who are wearing this “sweater”, and they haven’t even noticed that there is no hole for the head!
Thank you so much!
You know that everyone ought to wear a sweater. And everyone would look better in a sweater. And that secretly everyone WANTS to wear a sweater even if they publicly maintain that they are not a sweater-wearer. They just have to find one that fits them and everything will by hunky-dory.
And finally, those of us who are radical asweaterists should just go live in a cave and let people enjoy their comfortable sweaters (even if there’s no hole for their head).