I finally did as I have seen many people urge everyone to do, and took a look at When Women Refuse on tumblr. It’s not fun or placid reading. Be warned.
Arthur Morgan III gets a life sentence for killing his 2-year-old daughter
Arthur Morgan III killed his 2-year-old daughter by throwing her into a creek while strapped into a car seat weighed down with a tire jack. He did it to get back at his ex for breaking off her relationship with him.
“It was because he wanted Imani and he couldn’t have her,” prosecutor Marc LeMieux said. “So he took away the one precious thing in her life.”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/28/arthur-morgan-iii-life-sentence_n_5403246.html
Principal murdered by husband
Two weeks after my son started kindergarten, the dynamic, amazing principal of his school was murdered by her husband after she told him that she wanted a divorce: http://www.post-gazette.com/local/city/2005/11/19/Flewellen-guilty-of-wife-s-murder/stories/200511190136.
Move ahead to the next page.
19-year-old woman murdered after turning down a 31-year-old man for sex
Seth Mazzaglia, 31, is charged with first-degree murder in the death of Elizabeth “Lizzi” Marriott. Marriott, of Westborough, Massachusetts, was a 19-year-old student at the University of New Hampshire who was lured to Mazzaglia’s apartment by his girlfriend.
Marriott’s body was thrown into the Piscataqua River and has not been recovered.
INDIANA, Pa. —State police said an Indiana County man accused of a triple homicide used a hunting knife to kill his two young daughters before following his estranged wife home from work, where he also killed her and set fire to both of their houses.
The next page.
Mother-of-three murdered by her husband for “establishing an independent life”
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-27224496
“A mother of three from Manchester was murdered by her husband for becoming “too westernised” and “establishing an independent life”, a court has heard.
Rania Alayed, 25, went missing last June but her body has never been found.
Her husband admits causing her death, claiming he was “possessed of a spirit” when he pushed her, causing her to stumble, fall and bang her head.”
(Image and text from BBC article).
That’s a selection, and it’s only 12 hours back.
But don’t mention the misogyny.
Yes, there is a cost to women refusing men’s attentions. So why won’t that reality figure at all into certain people’s calculus?
Sorry if that was derailing. This tumblr is just fucking devastating.
Oh my god. Pages and pages into that blog’s posts, and they’re still fresh from the last 24 hours. I don’t know what to do but cry. It’s really overwhelming.
Yes. I was too chickenshit to read a lot of it.
Reading that blog, I’ve begun to honestly think that the only safe thing to do when you or someone you love is leaving an abusive relationship — the kind where the victim says “I’m leaving him — I just need to make sure he can’t find me” — is to make sure he’s dead. I’m sitting here trying to think of something else that would work, some alternative that’s good enough that I’d say it to a friend, and I’m failing.
That’s a terrible and needed tumblr. Thanks for posting about it.
I did a short post last fall after CBS aired a story about a girl killed by her ex-boyfriend and titled it “Loved to Death.” What I didn’t discuss, to my regret, was the problem with presenting “breakup violence” as gender neutral.
When a female friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend, one who had never been violent while they were together, he came to her house and asked if they could just talk about their break-up. When she agreed and let him in her home, he then assaulted and raped her. I would have never thought him capable of that. No warning signs.
This same friend committed suicide a few years later.
There are so many, many cases like this.
In Montréal a man, a cardiologist killed his two young children, aged 3 and 5 with a knife after his wife announced she was divorcing him.
In another case, also in Montréal, a 74 year old father was given 60 days community service as punishment for having slapped his 13 year old daughter to death for failing to do her “chores”.
However his sentence was reduced to 41 days as he’d already spent nineteen days in jail during the trial, and he was also allowed to choose which days of the week ( he opted for Mondays and Tuesdays) he would do his community service.
The other members of the family were ‘pleased’ with the sentence…
Years ago, when I was in college, a friend from work asked me to come over and stay with her one night. A guy she’d been on one date with had become enraged when he learned she’d slept with a black man in the past, and after she made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him he began stalking her. While I was at her apartment, he drove slowly down her street in his ridiculously large truck.
He was planning to become a police officer.
Whenever y’all notice there’s a lack of women in certain fields, or speaking publicly, or starting businesses and kickstarters… this is part of why. It’s not just the sexist selection bias, gendered family care demands, or even the ongoing bullying and sexual harassment that drives women underground. Women who cross paths with abusers may have to leave their former careers and contacts behind just to survive.
The horrible crime of terrorism on or using airplanes has a vanishingly small probability of happening to anyone, but there’s no sense that it’s pathetic to worry about it or foolish to spend billions of dollars trying to prevent the next occurrence.
On the other hand, horrible crimes against women are an everyday, every minute, every second occurrence. Women live in a war zone, and have the fatality numbers, emergency room treatments, and PTSD to prove it. Yet if women show fear or try to avoid danger, it’s pathetic and frilly and silly. Women are supposed to sail through life as if the wind is always at their backs and nothing worries them.
The amazing thing is that even in the war zone where they live, so many women do exactly that.