Have some bad advice.
It’s given by someone called Penelope Trunk, who is the founder of something called Brazen Careerist, which is “a social network for young professionals.” She gives “career advice” at her website, penelopetrunk.com. I wouldn’t look to her for advice if I were you.
CBS News disagrees with me though, and offers her advice to a trusting world.
Of course, sexual harassment is ubiquitous. It is so prevalent on the job that girls can expect to encounter workplace harassment the first summer they work during high school. And it continues for a long time.
But don’t report it. That would be most unwise.
In fact, smart women don’t file formal complaints against ordinary harassment. They either ignore it or handle it on their own.
Because that’s how progress is made – by individuals either doing nothing, or doing something on their own, covertly and with shame.
The bottom line for a woman, though, is that if you want to have a career of increasing power, you are going to have to keep quiet about the harassment.
So suck it up laydeez. Maybe things will get better some other century.
Once you become aware of the widespread tolerance for harassment throughout the world, it becomes clear that you will have to put up with it as a form of cultural diversity. If you want to be good at working with a wide range of people, you need to be good at brushing off harassment.
It’s the liberal thing to do.
H/t Jen Phillips
Because hey, the world, and business culture, are just fine as they are. Which is why the world population is about one million, we farm with sticks, keep small herds of animals, and trade with distant communities once a year.
Don’t change anything now.
Sniper fire is normal. Some of your friends will fall, kicking and bleeding from snipers bullets. But don’t you retyrn fire, because sniper fire is the proper order of things.
Disgusting. If it weren’t for people making noise and complaints about sexual harassment, things would be a lot worse than they are, not that they’re already particularly good.
The usual reactionary drivel that ‘smart people’ focus on getting ahead as INDIVIDUALS without opposing the status quo, as if that’s even possible.
I thought this was the libertarian thing to do.
. . . a form of cultural diversity?? Penelope Trunk isn’t very good thinker.
I suspect Penelope Trunk is a middle-aged white man who propositions younger women in elevators at conferences and can’t believe it when they get offended.
Just putting up with it might work to advance a particular woman’s career– to a certain point, at which doors will begin to shut in her face because that’s as far as women are allowed to go. It’s not, however, going to bust through glass ceilings or make things any better for anyone else.
I understand going along to get along as a survival mechanism. I don’t understand recommending it like it’s a good thing.
And if it grinds you down, if it leads to mental illness, if you drop out, you were simply not leadership material. Because that’s more of a guy thing.
It’s not false to say that reporting harassment can hurt your career. Maybe it’s not even wrong to include that fact in advice to someone who is dealing with harassment, because, in my opinion, it’s fine to take that into account when choosing what to do about a situation where you’ve been harassed. What is wrong, is talking as if this state of affairs is just fine and dandy.
This defeatism is indeed seems to be very prevalent, and I fail to understand it. I don’t know how you go from “harassment is a very serious problem at work and online” to “so we shouldn’t fight it”. It’s like saying “your cold has really gotten worse, your throat is infected, so avoid doctor at all costs”. It’s not that they deny that there is a problem, not that the problem is not serious, you just avoid the very serious problem. I don’t get it. People trying to magically turn their apathy and lack of courage and comfort seeking into arguments.
I wonder if CBS News would endorse the following:
Of course, racial discrimination is ubiquitous. It is so prevalent on the job that African-Americans can expect to encounter workplace discrimination the first summer they work during high school. And it continues for a long time.
In fact, smart people of colour don’t file formal complaints against ordinary discrimination They either ignore it or handle it on their own.
The bottom line for a person of colour, though, is that if you want to have a career of increasing power, you are going to have to keep quiet about the discrimination.
Once you become aware of the widespread tolerance for racism throughout the world, it becomes clear that you will have to put up with it as a form of cultural diversity. If you want to be good at working with a wide range of people, you need to be good at brushing off bigotry.
What bothers me about sentiments like this is that they treat harassment as part of the environment instead of actions consciously made by real people.
And that “cultural diversity” line is a new low that makes me ill. I must be held to such a high standard of acceptance of others, but they are held to none? Why must I be tolerant of their beliefs if they can’t even be tolerant of my presence? No. My tolerance ends where your bigotry begins.
Real cultural diversity doesn’t just go one way. They have to realize they live in a culturally diverse society, too, or the whole thing falls apart. That’s what people like this are forgetting. They don’t hold harassers to any standard. So we must accept it or avoid it or else the consequences are our fault.
This is where victim blaming comes from.
As a woman who has worked in a male-dominated profession for the last three decades, I have to say I think her advice is spot on – at least for the 80’s and 90’s. Things are a bit better now.
Learn to ignore the harassment or deal with it is better advice for someone who wants to build a career. It’s not fair and it’s not right, but good advice takes into account how the world actually is and the expected consequences of various actions.
If a woman files a formal complaint, she had better be prepared to kiss her career there good-bye. And, depending on the industry, it may well end her career in that field. While the odds are better today than in that last century, it’s still an outcome with a high probably. For women who care about the work they do and want to continue it, it can be a tough call. Add in the fact that filing a complaint may well result in even more harassment, it’s a step that should only be taken if and when a woman decides she’s rather stop working there than live with the harassment.
Beth @13:
Not just sexual harassment complaints. Anything that shows you aren’t going along with the local culture will do the same. Whistle-blowing, even internally, can do the same. E.g., if you discover your company is doing something illegal (=that could get employees arrested) or unethical, your best bet is to find a job elsewhere and not say anything unless subpoenaed.
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Even if your potential next employer agrees that what you objected to is objectionable, they’ll be reluctant to hire someone who makes a fuss about objectionable things — you might find something objectionable at their place.
Sadly, in many real world situations, women do have to put up with it, not just in order to advance, but in order to keep their jobs in the first place.
I had a gig where the boss liked to hire pretty young women as account managers. Mid-level people; every one of them bright and capable, so the issue wasn’t necessarily that of hiring a bag of hammers over a less-attractive more-competent alternative. But there were never less-attractive women in the office…period.
This boss liked to have meetings with these mid-level managers. One-on-one, door closed. Hour-long. Where — it was reported to me — he pretty much did nothing but stare at their chests and review in minute detail status that had been reviewed in minute detail the day before and the day before that and the day before that.
And what was their recourse? Either put up with it or change jobs (out of the company). That’s it. One was a single mom.
Sometimes, the world just does suck that badly.
I wish this could be framed on the wall.
‘… put up with it as a form of cultural diversity’
‘Cultural’ diversity, ‘epistemic’ diversity, ‘moral’ diversity.
Can anyone think of these ideas without cringing?
Penelope Trunk is huge in the homeschooling world, where her message is that any woman who wants a career is just a big ole’ ugly loser. A mother who works is just a traitor to the human race, and the only true happiness comes from homeschooling your children because no child has ever had a good education in public or private school.
Really??! That didn’t even occur to me.
Yes, she “had it all” by having “it” in succession–work first, then family. How nice for her that she has the option of being a stay at home mom/homeschooler and doesn’t need to earn a paycheck herself in order to put food on the table, except by writing horrible advice (from her home office) for people navigating careers that she no longer has to worry about.
She also has two boys, and zero girls. I wonder how her narrative would change, if at all, if she were faced with the task of preparing her daughters for a life of quietly enduring sexual harassment.
I keep trying to find a silver lining in this article and I just can’t. Phyllis Schlafly could have written it.