Touchdown Jesus is on fire!

A lot of storms have been moving through the Midwest today, and apparently the infamous Touchdown Jesus in Ohio hasn’t been spared God’s wrath.

The “King of Kings” statue in Monroe was struck by lightning on Monday and engulfed in flames, according to various reports. The statue of Jesus in Monroe, dubbed the King of Kings by the Solid Rock Church where it resides, was struck by lightning during the severe storms on Monday.

It was engulfed in flames.

Fire crews are on the scene now, and are attempting to put out the fire. The is made out of wood and Styrofoam, covered over a steel framework anchored in concrete. This is covered with a fiberglass mat and resin exterior. It is 62 feet high and weighs 16,000 pounds.

Part of me feels bad – I mean, I wouldn’t want my $500,000 property to be destroyed. On the other hand, there’s a certain amount of schadenfreude when a giant Jesus gets struck by lightning and destroyed. I mean, how many times have atheists suggested that God strike them with lightning if he was real, but he’s never delivered? I guess he’s annoyed by gaudy Christian art more than godless heathens.

…That being said, the first person to find a photo wins a million internet points. EDIT: Found!

(Hat tip to Mike)

Relationship advice from Pat Robertson

What do you get when you ask Pat Robertson for relationship advice? Misogynistic bullshit, of course!

TERRY MEEUWSEN (co-host): Pat, this is from Anne who says, “My husband has always been a flirt and loves to talk with other women he finds attractive. He says he would never cheat on me but his actions are starting to get to me. What should I do?

ROBERTSON: Anne, first thing is you need to make yourself as attractive as possible and don’t hassle him about it. And why is he doing this? Well, he’s doing it because he wants affirmation that he is still a man, that he is attractive — and he gets an affirmation of himself. That means he’s got an inferiority complex that’s coming out. And he’s not gonna cheat on you. He’s just playing.

But you need to not drive him away or start hassling and hounding on him, but make yourself as beautiful as you can, as fun as you can, and say let’s go out here, let’s go there, let’s go to the other thing. So — and Terry disagrees.

MEEUWSEN: That’s a lot more grace than I do, Anne. Let me just say we’d be having a serious conversation.

ROBERTSON: Affirmation. Affirmation, dear heart.

Why do husbands flirt and cheat? Because you’re fugly. Go put on some makeup, already.

I would love to see Pat’s reaction if this was a man writing about his flirting wife. I have a feeling he wouldn’t be promoting “affirmation.”

(Via Slog)

Female scientists: They’re super effective!

Exciting breaking news, everybody! This is a monumental step for female scientists everywhere. I just found out that we have the first female professor in a scientific field long dominated by men. I’d like to introduce Professor Araragi……the new Pokemon Professor!

Yes, I’m excited for Pokemon Black & White to be released. Don’t judge me for hanging on to a piece of my childhood – the games are addictive and fun! I did geek out about the Professor being a woman, though. Hey, when popular culture starts recognizing that scientists can be female – especially an attractive female instead of a frumpy stereotype – that’s a step in the right direction.

Boobs may not cause earthquakes, but abortions cause oil leaks

Just to remind everyone that middle-eastern Muslim clerics don’t have a monopoly on crazy wackjobbery, here’s a new supernatural hypothesis from an American Christian minister:

It has been widely broadcast that the largest Planned Parenthood abortion clinic in the nation has been built in Houston, TX. This six story tall (six is the number of the flesh man*) abortion supercenter was opened in May, just a short time before the Deepwater Horizon oil disaster began.

And because Houston has other places that provide abortion services, that’s obviously the cause of the oil leak. Yep, air-tight reasoning, right there. And while I’m pro-choice, I think testing this hypothesis scientifically may have some ethical ramifications, sooooo…yeah, let’s just skip right to calling this guy a loon, okay?

He also rambles a bit about how “nice” Christians like Joel Osteen are ruining Christianity, and something about hurricanes and babies, but hell if I can figure it out. I just like this graphic he uses of a hurricane baby:Aha! Proof of…um…something. Maybe an overactive imagination?

(Via Jezebel)

*WTF?

You guys are amazing – TAM goal reached!

It was brought to my attention that the ChipIn widget wasn’t updating, but it doesn’t matter – you guys obliterated my goal! I went to bed soon after making the fundraising post at 2:30am, and upon waking up at 10:30am you all had donated $1,562.

Holy fuckballs.

I’m seriously tearing up. I put a low goal for fundraising since I felt guilty enough asking, and thought maybe I could raise a couple hundred bucks, hoping that any little bit would help. Now I feel bad for underestimating the generosity of effectively strangers. It’s moderately terrifying to imagine what would happen if that post went up now, instead of in the middle of the night.

I took the ChipIn widget down since I now have plenty of money for TAM. Like I said, anyone who donated $50 or more will get an autographed copy of The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas once the American version (with me!) comes out in November. I’ll use some of this extra money to defray the cost of buying and shipping books. And any money that’s remaining after that I’ll donate to the Secular Student Alliance to start off my Blogathon charity fundraiser in July.

If you still want to donate out of the goodness of your heart and to support this blog, I’ve added a PayPal button in the right column. But more importantly, THANK YOU! I seriously can’t express how appreciative I am. Maybe size 60 font and animated sparkles would get the point across, but I’ll spare you. Seriously, you all have only confirmed that I have the most wonderful readers ever! I love you guys .

Now if you excuse me, I’m going to go dance around naked. Weeeeeee!

I’ll be speaking at TAM8, but I need your help!

EDIT: Holy crap! You guys absolutely destroyed my fundraising goal! More information here. I love you all. Seriously, free fucking hugs at TAM.

I just found out that I’ll be speaking at The Amaz!ng Meeting 8, the annual skeptical conference (or more accurately, the epic skeptical extravaganza) organized by the James Randi Educational Foundation! My talk will be during the Sunday session on “Skepticism, Humor, and Going Viral: What we can learn from Boobquake.”

Needless to say, I’m super excited. This my first time speaking at a skeptical conference, and I can easily say it’s the biggest skeptical conference out there. Setting the bar high, I guess.

But it’s not just about people hearing my talk – TAM is an amazing networking opportunity for skeptics. I’ve been repeatedly told it’s one of the few places where you can comfortably talk and mingle with all sorts of big name people. The list of speakers this year includes James Randi (of course), Richard Dawkins, Adam Savage, Penn & Teller, Rebecca Watson, Phil Plait, Michael Shermer, D. J. Grothe, Jennifer Michael Hecht, Simon Singh, Karen Stollznow… Yeah, wow. For someone who’s just starting their skeptical career, and hopefully has many productive years ahead of her, this will be an amazing opportunity for me. There’s just one tiny problem.

I’m kind of a poor college student.

My scholarships from Purdue have ended because I just graduated, and my first paycheck from the University of Washington doesn’t come until mid October (and we all know how rich that grad student salary will make me). On top of that, TAM isn’t cheap. Student registration is $350, a plane ticket is around $400, then there’s hotel, airport parking, that awesome looking optional workshop on feminism… Yeah. I may be able to pitch in a couple hundred, especially if I eat nothing but ramen for a month, but I still need help.

So, faithful readers, I’m asking you to help a blogger out. I know the economy is tough, but it would mean so much to me if you could chip in even a dollar. Or if you don’t have the cash, spread the word. I’m the kind of person who hates asking anyone, even my parents, for money, but some of my twitter followers said they really wanted to help me out. If I’m still short I’ll beg mom and dad, but I’m not sure how two retired teachers outside the skeptical movement will react to me asking for money to go to Vegas.

If you can help, you can do so through PayPal using the ChipIn widget bellow:

EDIT: Widget removed because my goal was more than met. If you’re really dying to donate more out of the goodness of your heart, I’ve added a PayPal button in the rightmost column.

What’s in it for you? Well, for one, I’ll definitely be blogging and tweeting about TAM! And if this opens doors for me (which it hopefully will), that only means more exciting blogging in the future. And if you’re going to TAM, well, then you’ll get to meet me!

But for those of you who need more tangible motivation… If you donate $50 or more, I will send you a personally autographed copy of the American edition of The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas after it’s release on Nov 2. Paypal will give me your email, and we can discuss shipping later.

And if that’s not enough, if I reach my goal of $850, I will dance around my apartment naked! You won’t be able to see it, but won’t the world be a better place simply knowing it happened?

So if you can, please help out! I’d really rather not rely on hitchhiking to Las Vegas or selling myself into Hemant‘s harem for cash (he’s supposed to be in my harem, goddammit!). Anyway, thanks in advance for your help! Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some presentations to work on – TAM, Secular Student Alliance conference, Evolution 2010*… busy summer!

*In case you’re wondering, the SSA conference is cheap and only a couple hours away, and I’m getting reimbursed for Evolution 2010 through my research lab…so, no, not just spending all of my money on those!

Mario Marathon 3 is approaching!

From their website:

Mario Marathon is an annual fan run fundraiser for Child’s Play Charity. Child’s Play provides toys, games and books to patients of children’s hospitals worldwide.

The multi day internet event, broadcast live online, attracts an audience from around the world to watch as the team plays through twenty five years of Super Mario Brothers video games.

Now in its third year, the event has attracted over 300,000 viewers, and raised nearly $45,000 for Child’s Play.

This is a fantastic, fun way to raise money for charity. Plus, they’re based in Lafayette, IN! I actually met one of the players when they came out to our Boobquake rally to show their support. Check out their site to donate, and make sure to tune in on the 25th!

Spit, Swallow, or Soufflé?

Friends send me strange sex-related articles all the time. I probably should be concerned what this says about my interests and personality, but I’m more intrigued by the articles themselves. I always think to myself, “Wow, nothing can be stranger than this.” I’m usually wrong.

Latest example: The cutting edge in cookbooks, Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes.

“Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients – you will love this cook book!”

Uhhh…what a delicious looking…glaze?

…I think I suddenly became a vegetarian.

(Via Living the Scientific Life)

Man, binomial nomenclature is naughty!

What happens when biologists try to get nerdy license plates? They get rejected for being potentially inappropriate:

A forest ecologist’s application for a personalized license plate in the state of Michigan has been denied on the grounds that “PINUS” looks and sounds too much like “PENIS.” Marvin Roberson, who works for the Sierra Club in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, says he applied for the specialized plate out of arborous love for the white pine (pinus strobus in Latin). However, officials denied his request on the grounds that the plate “might carry a connotation offensive to good taste and decency as judged by the Department of State.”

For the sake of appreciating the juvenile humor, I’m going to ignore the fact that the name of a body part is considered offensive in our society. But really, Pinus isn’t the worst genus you could come up with. Arses, Colon, Bugeranus, Enema, Fartulum, Labia, Orgia, Turdus… Hmmm, us biologists haven’t progressed very far past potty humor, have we?*

I’d love it if scientists could successfully sneak in real “dirty” terms if we’re nerdy enough that the DMV doesn’t recognize them. I think a lot of mammalogists would kill for a BACULUM** license plate!

*If you want to see other silly binomial nomenclature, this site has a great database.
**A baculum is the penis bone found in most mammals (but interestingly, not humans). Mammalogists have a strange and amusing fascination with it, partly for scientific reasons, but partly because it’s funny. Seriously, when I went to the Mammal meetings last year, the most popular merchandise at the auction was carved baculum stuff. Scientists, so weird.