I’ve noticed a trend that lately food commercials are becoming super sexual. Now, I don’t watch a ton of TV, so maybe this has always been going on… But some of these commercials have shot way past Funny and landed in Moderately Disturbing. I know they always say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but is the way to his stomach through his junk?
For example, Padma Lakshmi’s Hardee’s commercial:
Mmmm, yeah former vegetarian, put that big hunk of Western meat into your mouth. Oh yeah, lick it up. Because you know Western meat is better than that puny Indiana cock…er, I mean meat. Meat. Yeaaah.
Ok, Padma is smoking hot, but is it really attractive to see a gal dribble barbeque sauce all over herself and then lick it off? Actually, don’t answer that. Anyway, this commercial is nothing compared to ones with more overt sexuality:
Oh god, Arby’s hat boner, really? I’m open to a lot of kinks and fetishes, but I think I draw the line at Fast Food Worker Selling Food. But at least that one involved two human beings.
This White Castle commercial is yet more proof that there Is No God.
Really, what the hell? Every time this comes on I die a little inside as I stare at my television set, mortified. I think the worst part is I know there are probably furries out there somewhere masturbating over this thing. And again with the sexy barbeque sauce. Do you know how sticky that would be? Yuck.
I have to admit I think this is the funniest one in the bunch, only because it’s so wrong that it has to be good. Anything involving a gay sub-dom relationship with a toaster oven and a power bottom sandwich making boy gets an A+ in my book. But does it make me want to stick Quizno’s Toasty Torpedo in my mouth? Nooooo.
Why do I even bring this up? Because my friend just linked me to the most disturbing video of all. Honeslty, this is probably NSFW.
Thank you, Sprite, for forever making me associate the flavor of Sprite with that of jizz.
Now, if I was a good feminist, I would write up some diatribe about how all of these commercials are examples of the objectification of women and sexist and yadda yadda. But I have a bigger issue with the commercials – do these really make people buy the food? I get that they’re humorous, but do you really want to go grab a Sprite and a Toasty Torpedo right about now? I’d prefer not to think about a soda money shot while eating my dinner, but maybe that’s just me.
Yuck.
Yes, those commercials do make people buy the food. Ads are very important for a business to generate sales.
Yes, those commercials do make people buy the food. Ads are very important for a business to generate sales.
Advertising is uncreative on TV anymore…every "good" ad anymore is sexual innuendo (even if it's a bad joke).
Advertising is uncreative on TV anymore…every “good” ad anymore is sexual innuendo (even if it’s a bad joke).
Hmm. The last commercial I saw that actually made me interested in buying the product advertised, or at least learn more about it, was …
…
I'll get back to you.
Hmm. The last commercial I saw that actually made me interested in buying the product advertised, or at least learn more about it, was ……I’ll get back to you.
Don't forget, the objective of Pepsi and Coke ads aren't to make you buy Pepsi and Coke, respectively, it's to make it so when you feel like a drink you're choosing between Pepsi and Coke, rather than the brand you've never heard of.
Don’t forget, the objective of Pepsi and Coke ads aren’t to make you buy Pepsi and Coke, respectively, it’s to make it so when you feel like a drink you’re choosing between Pepsi and Coke, rather than the brand you’ve never heard of.
What are you talking about? This is awesome. It's great for cheap romance novel writers. Imagine the lines….
"Prince Valiant turned to Princess Belle-Flowers. It was time to take what was rightfully his. Kissing turned more heated, and soon she felt like her soft White Castle Pork Strips in BBQ Sauce™ were aflame. Soon she was peeling back his Arby's™ hat and revealing his Quiznos' Foot Long™. Passionate lovemaking ensued, followed by the heated splash of Sprite™."
It's a goldmine!
What are you talking about? This is awesome. It’s great for cheap romance novel writers. Imagine the lines….”Prince Valiant turned to Princess Belle-Flowers. It was time to take what was rightfully his. Kissing turned more heated, and soon she felt like her soft White Castle Pork Strips in BBQ Sauce™ were aflame. Soon she was peeling back his Arby’s™ hat and revealing his Quiznos’ Foot Long™. Passionate lovemaking ensued, followed by the heated splash of Sprite™.”It’s a goldmine!
I saw the Sprite commercial before it was taken off of collegehumor, but I had no idea about the other ones. Just another advantage/thing that keeps me out of the loop here.
What gets me about all of this is how people freak the fuck out about sexuality, drug references, violence and (heaven forbid) swear words in music, video games and on TV… but everyone knows that SEX SELLS, and as unappealing as these commercials are, there is a reason that they're made. Just don't try to have an honest discussion about the truth of any of these issues, because THAT would be out of bounds.
Hmph.
I saw the Sprite commercial before it was taken off of collegehumor, but I had no idea about the other ones. Just another advantage/thing that keeps me out of the loop here. What gets me about all of this is how people freak the fuck out about sexuality, drug references, violence and (heaven forbid) swear words in music, video games and on TV… but everyone knows that SEX SELLS, and as unappealing as these commercials are, there is a reason that they’re made. Just don’t try to have an honest discussion about the truth of any of these issues, because THAT would be out of bounds. Hmph.
Actually, no. These commercials do not make anybody eat or buy this food. I should know. Embarrassingly enough, this is what I’m supposed to be an expert on. See, seeing something sexualized, while it does tap into a certain urge, does little else to sell a product. In order to properly sell something, you have to tell a person WHY they want it. And trust me when I say most people do not associate food and sex that way. The appeal of sexualized ads is that it is a cheap gimmick that “works”, in the sense that it will occasionally catch someone’s attention long enough for them to recognize a product. But in the end, a real powerful ad will do more. It will show you the product, show you exactly why this product is superior to others, be it taste, health, or simply being unique, and then it will tell you to buy the product. This is actually important to the ad process; simply showing a product off is not enough. People will be more willing to buy something if they are actually told what they need to do with it. “Just Do It” is an old standby, as you don’t actually have to tell them what to “do”. Just knowing that they’ve been instructed is good enough. But giving the viewer a reason is also good. Re-enforcing the positive aspects of the product helps to sell the product, and THAT is what sexualized ads do. They, when done properly, have the viewer associate the product with something they enjoy, and that puts them in a positive place when they think of the ad. There’s a problem with sexualized ads though. While they are good for catching attention and putting the viewer in a positive place, they’re also very, very distracting. Once you’ve utilized the sex card, viewers aren’t going to care about anything else in the ad,and this is an absolute shame. There are so many more levels upon which you could entice the viewer; but since this has started to become a rant on proper ad writing, I think I’ll stop here and just say that while sex CAN sell, you have to do it well, do it right, and once you’ve done it, you can’t really do anything else.
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