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Jim Bakker. Now whining and wailing about how he cannot, cannot I say, preach the gospel, no! I cannot, because if I do, they will kill me! Now I’m going to whine and moan and cry about not being able to talk or preach, because that makes all manner of sense!

The people who hate God, Bakker said, “have beat back all opposition, they have changed America” but have so far been unable to destroy the word of God.

“The warfare is against the God of heaven,” he said. “The God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob.The God whose son is Jesus Christ. I’m serious. You have no idea. I can’t even talk about it because they will kill me. And I don’t care what you say, I know what I’m talking about. They’ve already threatened my life because they disagree with the Bible.”

There are self-proclaimed shitlords all over the ‘net who delight in threatening all kinds of people. I’ll admit, it’s difficult for me to imagine anyone taking you so seriously, but I guess you never know. I don’t disagree with the bible, it does a fine job of disagreeing with itself. I dismiss it as irrelevant. I don’t care if you have intense bible spanking sessions or whatnot, just keep it private, please. Of course you don’t care what anyone says, you know it all, and the nebulous “they” are out to get you. Right. I would think if someone was threatened, they might go dark for a while, but not Jim! He’s gonna go right on preaching about how he can’t preach!

Bakker said that the God-haters had just about gained total control of America until the election of President Trump, so now “they are trying to bring in millions of illegals … to build a new voting group” in order to seize control of government. Christians must therefore unite behind Trump, Bakker added, because his opponents “want to kill, they want to march, they want to burn, they want to break windows, they want to burn up cars.”

Oh, constant plaint of the white male: X is coming to get you! They’ll march, loot, burn, go after your white women…the white people reasoning to commit and justify horrific acts. I’ll cop to the wanting to march business, nothing wrong with protesting, which should not be a crime, and isn’t, in spite of all the old white men attempts to make it so. We would also dearly like for the political system to work correctly for once, and oust the Idiot King and his Henchasskisser. You? I don’t care about you at all, Jim. Well, your constant whinging does provide opportunities for delicious mockery now and then. I do think all you evangelical assholes need to kicked out of the current regime, as you never should have been allowed in in the first place.

I can’t be arsed to hate your psychogod, but I certainly don’t harbour any love for all its ugly followers, whose inner lives are fantasies about being the world inquisition. That’s why you’re always maundering on about how non-theists want to kill and persecute you, because you can’t imagine doing anything else yourselves, if you get the power you crave. You’re the ones who hate this life, because you’re preoccupied with your supposed pie-in-the-sky when you die belief.

“I think the biggest miracle is President Trump has lived almost a year as president of the United States,” Bakker said, which prompted his guest, Tom Horn, to declare that Trump “has accomplished more in one year than in the last 20 combined.”

Oh please. Yes, the Tiny Tyrant has set a record for most golf ever played by a prez in the first year ever. Yes, the Idiot King has set a record for the most fuckwitted and WTF moments, ever. He’s fucked up one thing after another. He’s embraced Nazis. He’s paving the way for a theocracy. Now outside of those things, please, point me to a concrete list of all his “accomplishments”.  I’ll wait.

Via RWW, where there’s playable video.