Samuel L. Mitchill.
It’s getting beyond embarrassing to identify as an American. I think I’ll go with Fredish. Why not?
In Vol. VI, Part IV, of the Medical Repository, 1803, pp. 449–50, Dr. Samuel Mitchill, wrote the following under the heading of “Medical and Philosophical News”:
Proposal to the American literati, and to all the citizens of the United States, to employ the following names and epithets for the country and nation to which they belong; which, at the distance of 27 years from the declaration and of 20 years from the acknowledgment of their independence, are to this day destitute of proper geographical and political denominations, whereby they may be aptly distinguished from the other regions and peoples of the earth:
Fredon, the aggregate noun for the whole territory of the United States.
Fredonia, a noun of same import, for rhetorical and poetical use.
Fredonian, a sonorous name for ‘a citizen of the United States’.
Frede, a short and colloquial name for ‘a citizen of the United States’.
Fredish, an adjective to denote the relations and concerns of the United States
Example. Fredon is probably better supplied with the materials of her own history than Britain, France, or any country in the world, and the reason is obvious, for the attention of the Fredonians was much sooner directed, after their settlement, to the collection and preservations of their facts and records than that of the Dutch and Irish. Hence it will happen that the events of Fredish history will be more minutely known and better understood than those of Russian, Turkish, or Arabic. And thereby the time will be noted carefully when a native of this land, on being asked who he is and whence he came, began to answer in one word that he is a Frede, instead of using the tedious circumlocution that he was “a citizen of the United States of America.” And in the like manner notice will be taken of the association of Fredonia and Macedonia and Caledonia as a word equally potent and melodious in sound.
I’m not altogether clear on the preferred pronunciation, but that could be decided by mood, and allow for switches now and then.
Via Wikipedia.
I wanna be … anarchist,
get pissed.
Destroy.
Fredanarchist!
I wonder why this never caught on.
As an alternative solution you can always call yourself a sovereign citizen. It’s probably less embarrassing if only because I imagine most people, at least those outside the US, have no idea what that is. Plus you don’t have to pay taxes and are immune to US law and judgement unless the court has a flag will golden frills. That last part might be a myth, but … worth a shot?
Oh, that reminds me, I think you need guns to qualify as a sovereign citizen. Lots of them. You’ll have to field your own army, after all.
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It just occurred to me: sovereign citizens are just one half-assed executive order away from becoming lawful reality. All it takes is for one of them to get their act together long enough to get a job as a white house staffer. Once the order is signed Trump won’t care if he had no idea what was in it, whether it’s legal, feasible or even if he was wearing his reading glasses at the time. He signed it and he doesn’t make mistakes!
Interesting times…
Hail, Hail, Fre(e)donia, land of the free and brave!
“The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret”