If you’re feeling some frustration
With the leaders of this nation
Do your part to help them muddle through the mess
Politicians think it’s funny
Cos they really need your money
But it looks as though they’re getting rather less
Since Obama needs defeating,
Let’s help Romney, by not eating
As a show of faith, so God will take our side
Mitt needs help, without delay,
So let’s pray pray pray pray pray!
And, God willing, that must surely turn the tide
I’ll be fasting; I’ll be praying; I’ll be leading with my heart
Though I’ve done precisely nothing, still I feel I’ve done my part
I hear cynics sometimes saying
That they don’t believe in praying—
That it cannot make a difference, which we must!
All the pundits and the scholars
Say what matters more is dollars
But the bills remind us all “In God We Trust”
So I’m praying and I’m fasting—
My support is everlasting
Money’s worth is artificial–this is real!
That’s the sort of aid I’m choosing
So if Romney is still losing
Well, I’ve done my best; at least, that’s how I feel
Via CNN’s Belief Blog, the story of a Mormon email gone viral, urging Mormons everywhere to fast and pray for Mitt.
“A lot of my frustration is because I feel I don’t know what to do to really make a change. Well, this time I do,” she wrote. “I am asking you to join me and my family on Sunday Sept. 30 by fasting and praying for Mitt Romney. That he will be blessed in the debates,” the first of which is next Wednesday.
“I know that seems like such a small thing, but I believe ‘from small things, great things can come about,’” she continued. “I know that fasting and praying brings about miracles.”
The article implies that she does not give money to support Romney’s campaign, just her prayers and fasting. The fact that she has not contributed in any mundane, earthly manner doesn’t seem to matter; what matters is that she feels she has contributed:
“Whatever happens in this country,” she says, “at least I’ve done my part.”
May more people follow her example, and donate their prayers instead of their dollars.
I will meet them half way.
I will fast until breakfast.
Dammit, I started a new diet yesterday. Am I supporting Romney now?
I don’t mean to be mean,
but have you tried Mormon cuisine?
Utah’s vistas sure are grand,
but the food is awfully bland.
There is no white bread whiter,
(though their undies might be brighter)
It can not be much temptation,
when Sandra Lee’s the inspiration,
so they can fast and not get moody,
unlike us sinful coastal foodies.
I shall feast and blaspheme, then.
The lady is right.
For a Mitt Romney to come anywhere close to a Barack Obama in a one-on-one debate would indeed require a miracle.
Fortunately, there will be other Mormons (like Harry Reid) praying for him to fail, so Mormon God will be sitting this one out.
My wife didn’t know about the Mormon Magic Underwear so I just showed her a picture on Wikipedia. Great, she says, now every time I see Mitt Romney I’ll imagine him in those. That’s actually a pretty good idea! Who, other than Mormons, would vote for him after picturing that?
I’ll be sure to have a glass or three of wine in this lady’s honor come Sunday.
Since it’s my birthday, my special birthday wish after dinner and cake will be for mitt to be a complete success at showing us what his kinder vision of America would be.
Sounds good…Romney supporters should fast until election day. Any that are still able to make it to the polls deserve to have their vote counted.
I hear that fasting and praying actually does help you lose weight. Unfortunately, it tends to bounce back when you stop and reality sets it.
I got a dose of politically charged testimony when I went to a fast and testimony a few months ago, but it was only the one guy saying stuff about how this election would prove who is on the side of good or evil, etc etc. I bet that its reaching a fever pitch right about now. I’ve heard similar things about facebook.
For people who don’t know fasting and praying can also mean getting up at the fast and testimony meeting to share an “inspirational” story. The story has some really creepy key lines (“I know the church is true”, “I know the prophet is true”) and often includes sappy nonsense and crying. Ex-mormon groups are full of awesome f&t stories.