Watch the news ticker at the bottom, starting at 45 seconds in:
Thousands Of Girls Match Description Of Missing Sorority Sister
I mean, who else could they be talking about?
Seriously though, I love the Onion. I about lost it at “I just kept thinking that could have been me, you know? Was it?”
Oh, that’s too funny! I mean, unless they actually are screaming back at you now.
“Jessica, we love you, bitch.”
Lololol!! Poor spiders. Stop screaming at them! =p
lmao! i think that is me too!!! (i mean the spiders… not the blondes…)
Coincidentally, I just had a mammogram.
Just at the moment, for me, the video will not play any further than 45 seconds…
i actually match a couple of those descriptors. um, namely the love of diet coke and “the food network.”
I’ve heard of barking spiders, but not screaming ones (unless you are talking about the ones from Harry Potter, but we all know that is just bunk!)
So now I’m interested in a paper somewhere between genetics and anthropology entitled something like “The Origins of the Modern Bimbo”
I’m ashamed to admit that I actually JOINED a sorority back in the day (no idea why I went through that whole process in the first place). I’m glad I escaped that bullshit after a couple months of cynical observation. Anyway, I’d just like to mention that although the sorority stereotype does exist, bimbos do come in all shapes and sizes; stupidity is equal opportunity.
Maybe the spider is screaming because it is missing a leg? http://www.27bslash6.com/overd…
No, the spider is attempting to debate evolution with her. The spider has perfect faith that its leg will grow back if it prays to Spider Jesus…
“I mean, who else could they be talking about?” – JenOh noes, it’s started! Fame is going to our favorite feminist atheist nerd’s head!Jen, Jen, Jen…it’s not always about you. Get a grip! This is how it starts! On behalf of all your friends here…we don’t want to wake up one day to see paparazzi pics of you in Skeptic Magazine drunkenly stumbling out of a limo without your panties!!But you’re right, the vid and the crawler coincidence were hilarious. Viva Onion!
Hey! Speak for yourself! I’m sure a lot of the readers here who are hetero males, bi males, bi females, gay females, or hermaphrodites that are sexually attracted to females would love to see Jen without her panties…And if it happened, every one of us would support her defense that it was part of some human behaviorial experiment… which it probably would turn out to be anyway!-Though I do agree that The Onion is America’s finest news source. I know this to be true because it says so right on the web page. Not only that, but this claim is further supported by the print version of the newspaper which says exactly the same thing immediately below the masthead. Before someone challenges my reasoning here, keep in mind that the odds of two random strings of 28 characters that are either letters, spaces, or apostrophes, matching up so precisely is one in one less than 28 to the 27th power times 2, which is a really, really, humongously huge number.The perfect agreement between these two sources cannot possibly be coincidence, so the claim must be true!
Actually, I’m more of a boob man myself.
That’s no excuse! Seeing a woman without her panties doesn’t necessarily preclude seeing her boobs. In fact, I think it’s a fair assumption that, all other things being equal, given the existence of paparazzi pics displaying an absence of panties, the probability of a boob exhibition is more likely- not less.I would continue by severely scolding you for your poor grasp of probability if I didn’t just realize that I’ve made an awful mistake here, even worse than yours- the odds of two random strings of 28 characters that are either letters, spaces, or apostrophes matching up precisely is actually one in 28 to the 28th power. This means I was off by a factor of more than 28!